


Eyeglasses

by luna_autumn



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse of Khuzdul, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bilbo in glasses, Culture Shock, Erebor, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, Khuzdul, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Bilbo, Rugby, Self Confidence Issues, Slow Burn, Weight Issues, nerdy bilbo, thorin is so cute
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-23
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 14:04:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 56,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5499902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luna_autumn/pseuds/luna_autumn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin has the biggest crush on nerdy, glasses wearing, chubby Bilbo Baggins and Bilbo has the biggest crush on rugby athlete Thorin Durin. The problem is that none of them know that they like each other and poor low self-esteem Bilbo believes that he could never attract someone like Thorin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I really did my best with this chapter and I am planning on making it a multi-chapter, although I don't know how long this story will be though. I will let everyone know now that updates may be slow cause I am still dealing with my depression and I've been going through some stuff that has been affecting me lately, but rest assure that I will update!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

The move to a fresh new dorm with his best friend Dwalin was not a hassle to Thorin's surprise. He's been best friends with Dwalin since they were kids when they used to live in Erebor, which was a small country that still had a monarchy that ruled and a strange language that everyone assumed was dead. When they enter their room, they see that it already has two beds and two desks, one facing the window and the other close to the door. They unload their luggage's and started to decorate their side of the room. Dwalin had all of his heavy metal posters on his wall and shoved his extra snacks inside one of the drawers at his new desk by the door. Thorin had spread his new blue comforter on his bed and left his bag on his desk by the window; he placed his harp that his grandfather gave him when he was a teenager on his nightstand.

As they headed out their dorm they made it to the main square where there was an acre of grass with college students lying on their blankets and chatting about. Dwalin's eye caught a small college student with unruly honey blonde curls as he passed by them with his head casting down looking at his phone.

“Oh Mahal! Is that Bilbo?” asked Dwalin.

“Who?” But Thorin already knew who he was talking about. He looked towards where Dwalin was looking at and there he was, Bilbo Baggins in the flesh. Even though Dwalin is his closest friend he doesn't know everything about Thorin. Thorin has the biggest crush on small nerdy Bilbo Baggins since they went to high school together. Bilbo was usually picked on by other students and sometimes by his friends. He used to be picked on a lot now that Thorin thought about it. He was usually harassed cause of his size; he was shorter than the rest of the other boys in school, he wasn't athletic, he still had his baby cheeks, his fashion sense wasn't up to speed with the newest trends and he was kind of chubby. But the thing they picked on the most were his eyeglasses. Thorin knew that teens can be extremely cruel, but c'mon, his glasses? Seriously? It's not like Bilbo couldn't help his horrible eyesight. _Maybe he just didn't like wearing contacts_ , Thorin thought. Thorin liked Bilbo's glasses, he always thought that it gave an extra shine to his quirky personality. All and all, Bilbo was just a short, chubby, eyeglass wearing and average looking person to the high schoolers, but when Thorin saw him for the first time in his third period class, he couldn't stop gawking at him. His laughter was light and contagious whenever his friends were making jokes. His curly hair would bounce whenever he walked to his next class. Thorin noticed that whenever Bilbo got excited he flashes a toothy smile and he could swear to Mahal that he could've sworn that his eyes would sparkle. Thorin didn't care how his high school viewed Bilbo, all that mattered to him was that Bilbo was perfect in every way, chubby tummy and eyeglasses and all.

“You know! Bilbo! The one who got that scholarship for English?”

“Oh yeah! I remember now.” Thorin said. How could he not forget? He never saw Bilbo so happy in his entire life. He practically skipped with glee when he walked down the stage to receive his scholarship. His graduation gown's sleeves covered his small hands and he didn't think that he clapped that hard for anyone in his life now that he thought about it.

“C'mon! I'm starving!” Dwalin said. Thorin snapped out of his thoughts and followed his friend to the cafeteria to get some food. Inside the cafeteria, they grabbed their food and sat down. Dwalin got a greasy burger and fries and wolfed it down. Thorin barely touched his spaghetti. He hadn’t seen Bilbo since graduation and wondered where he was now. _Maybe he's in the library? Or getting settled in his dorm with his roommate?_ The thought of him being with someone else in a small room had Thorin halting his thoughts. _What if his roommate makes fun of his appearance just like the other kids did in high school? What if that roommate keeps him up at night from studying? What if he does something else_ \- oh Mahal he really needs to stop thinking about this right now.

“Dwalin! I just remembered that I forgot something at the dorm!”

“What? Tho-”

“I'll be back okay!” Thorin shouted. He left his food that was hardly eaten at the table and dashed off to where he last saw Bilbo. He thinks for a moment on where Bilbo could be at this hour. Eventually his feet take him to the library. It was huge, filled with books that probably still had a few old books that were there when the university was established. Thorin tried to be as casual as possible but his speed walking gave him away that he was in a hurry. He was frantically looking all over the library for Bilbo. He searched through the computer aisles where he could hear the students typing in great haste already creating essays that were due soon. He continued his search to find him and manages to go upstairs where they kept the literature novels. He goes through all the aisles not looking where he was going until he tripped on someone on the floor who had their nose in a book.

“Sorry. I wasn't looking where I was-”

“Thorin?”

Oh, sweet Mahal.

“Thorin Durin?” asked Bilbo. All Thorin could do was nod.

“Wow! I didn't know you were going to this university. How have you been?” he asked. He was wearing brown pants that reach down to his shins, a fading white shirt with an emerald green sweater vest. It took Thorin a moment to compose himself to get over how cute he looked and how much he wanted to ravish him...wait what?

“I've been doing fine. I never got to say congratulations on getting that scholarship, so congratulations!”

Bilbo's face flushed to the tip of his ears. He lets out a breathy giggle and mumbled his thanks. “So, what brings you to the library? As I recall you never really liked literature.”

Shit. He can't say that he was looking for him specifically, that would make him sound like a creep. He needed to think of an excuse quick! “Dwalin has a literature class this semester and I know how he is, he's going to find the book he needs to read for class at the last minute so I'm gonna have to find one for him.” Thorin said, hoping that it was a good enough excuse.

“Really? You're so nice. If it won't be too much trouble, I have a lot of recommendations for him.” said Bilbo. The thing was Dwalin doesn't even have a literature class this semester. His best friend was leaving all the harder courses for last. _“Don't want to stress myself in the beginning you know?”_ Dwalin said to him a week ago. Thorin told him that it would be a tremendous help and silently sent a thanks to Mahal for making the excuse work tremendously. So for about an hour and half Bilbo shows Thorin all the books that he really loved. _Pride and Prejudice, Oliver Twist, Emma, Great Expectations,_ honestly anything that was written by Jane Austen or Charles Dickens Bilbo gushed about them. Thorin could listen to Bilbo's voice for hours on end. His voice was soft spoken and he would slowly raise his voice when he got really excited about something. He remembered when someone in high school was making fun of one of his friends he shouted at him and started to curse at him. He never heard Bilbo shout much less curse; Bilbo looked too sweet and innocent to be cursing. Another thing that Thorin remembered was how sassy Bilbo was when someone really pushed his buttons. He was always so quick witted with everything that he said. His sarcastic tone of voice always made Thorin laugh, especially when it shuts someone up. It seemed that Bilbo caught his attention and said, “Sorry. I tend to babble on and on when it comes down to books.” He looked down sheepishly.

“I love hearing you talk.” Thorin said. He almost covered his mouth but he stopped midway when he saw Bilbo's doe eyes looking up at him with surprise; his eyes were shining and that meant that he was happy. Bilbo was about to say something until notification sounded off of Bilbo's phone.

“Oh crap! I'm sorry Thorin, but I have to go to my class now.” Maybe it was unconditional hope that he probably heard Bilbo's disappointment. Bilbo started to gather his messenger bag and his cup, which most likely had tea Thorin thinks. Bilbo whispered bye and sent a small short wave. Thorin started to head out to the cafeteria and shot a quick text to Dwalin.

_Where are you? -T_

_At the courtyard. Where were you? -D_

_I told you! I was at the dorm cause I forgot something!! -T_

_Suurree. It must've been something important if it took you almost an hour and half to find whatever it was. Did you find that thing you were looking for btw? -D_

_No. I must've forgot to bring it. -T_

Thorin's going to have to think of yet another excuse of what he “forgot” to bring with him when he meets with Dwalin.

~

The air was starting to become crisp as he was walking to his next class and most students started to wear their scarves and wrap their necks from the occasional cold breeze that passed through, but not Bilbo. He unwrapped his scarf because he didn't realize until now how hot he was. Talking with Thorin made his entire body flush and Bilbo silently cursed at his phone for interrupting him while talking to Thorin as he was walking to his next class. He hadn’t seen his crush since graduation and from the looks of it, summer has done Thorin some good. From the look of his muscles and nicely fitted jeans, rugby did a tremendous job on his body and it looked like he still played it a bit during the summer. Bilbo couldn't believe that Thorin Durin spoke to him! Bilbo always had a huge crush ever since Thorin came in his high school as a foreign exchange student.

He can still remember seeing Thorin walking to school and how everyone was intimidated by him with his long hair and braids and strange accent; it didn't help that his best friend Dwalin was equally as intimidating. Thorin was different from the rest of the kids in his high school; he never teased him about his weight or his fashion sense or dumb looking glasses. After school, Bilbo would hide behind the bleachers out in the field while he watched Thorin train for rugby. He usually scolded himself, telling himself that what he was doing was pretty creepy and stalkerish and that he was a Baggins and Baggins' would never be this inappropriate; but that damn Took side of his was always adventurous and mischievous so he couldn't help but stay a bit longer and see how Thorin's muscles twitched and gleamed with sweat with small blades of grass sticking on him like stickers.

Just by remembering about Thorin being sweaty, Bilbo rushed to his class faster and takes his jacket completely off cause sweet Yavanna when did it get this hot?

Panting heavily, he made it to his class and sat next to his friend Ori, whom he met at orientation.

"You look like you ran a mile! Are you okay?" asked Ori.

"Yeah! I'm completely fine, this uh coat that I used was too hot for this kind of weather." Bilbo said, hoping that the excuse was good enough and that Ori would drop the subject. Ori gave him a look knowing that Bilbo wasn't telling him something, but he would be nosy later because their professor walked into class.

Bilbo hardly paid any attention in class. All he could think about was Thorin's syrupy voice and how much of a good listener he was when he was rambling about his favorite literature books. Most of the time he wondered if he would ever run up to him again and his Took side definitely assures him that he most definitely will.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Chapter 2 is finally up! I'm terribly sorry if it's been so long, a lot of things have been in my way emotionally and mentally. I kind of don't like how this one went, but I'm hoping chapter 3 will be a lot better. Updates are still going to be slow since college has started now and I know for a fact that college algebra is going to kick my ass this semester (which is so dumb cause my major is Creative Writing, but you know how colleges work with wanting everyone to have their generals smh). So I hope you enjoy this chapter with these lovely oblivious blushing dorks. <3
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

It wasn’t an easy task to make up an excuse to convince Dwalin what Thorin was really up to, but Dwalin decided to let it go and accept whatever it was that Thorin was hiding from him. Every friend deserves their privacy and secrets. Throughout the entire day, Thorin kept himself busy with his classes and lectures and tried his best not to think of Bilbo, but how could he not? Bilbo's doe eyes and soft giggles kept ringing in his head. He thought to himself that he should see him again soon, but then again he doesn’t want to come off desperate, but his heart was telling him that he was desperate and that he should go for it! _What would be the harm? Oh, I don’t maybe the only thing would be if he wasn’t gay…yeah that sounds pretty harmful, doesn’t it?_  
  
Thorin's last class was Freshman Comp 1 which was the class he'd been dreading. He can still remember the day when he first came to his new high school. He was too shy to talk to anybody because of his heavy accent. He already knew English very well, thanks to his cultured grandmother, but it was the grammar that always gave him a headache. Why did there have to be so many rules? Commas? What the hell is a semicolon used for again? Preposition words, what? And who cares if that one sentence is a fragment! Thorin knew that he was not going to do well with this class especially when he knew his professor was one of the toughest in the entire university. He couldn’t catch a break, c’mon the toughest English professor in the university? Seriously? He barely understood what was going with his English developmental courses, how was he supposed to cope with this? Thorin couldn’t help himself but to hate this professor.

Professor Thranduil was the kind of professor that would look down on any student if they so much as didn't understand what a thesis statement was (and Thorin still had some troubles on writing a thesis statement trying not to make it sound too juvenile). Professor Thranduil was such a posh snob, with his sleek long blonde hair, that was always in a neat low ponytail, and crystalline blue eyes. He knew he was dashing and charming which made him think that he was the best of the best. This professor always ticked him off from the way he talks with a snobbish tone to the way he walks as if he were a king of some sorts.  
  
He was merciless to call out on a student who didn't understand what was going on in his lecture. Thorin, begrudgingly, always kept his head down and avoided eye contact from Professor Thranduil in fear of being called out. Thankfully, class was practically over and the students shoved their notebooks and textbooks into their bags and rushed to get the hell out of his class as soon as possible.  
  
"Students." Professor Thranduil said icily.  
  
Everyone was dead silent. So silent that you could’ve heard a pin drop if there ever was one. It was only one word but everyone could feel the bone chilling tone that he used to grab their attention.  
  
"Did I say that you could leave?”

Everyone was still quiet, giving each other a glance on whether to say something.

“Well from the sound of your silence it seems that I did not allow anyone to leave. The clock does not dismiss you, I dismiss you. So, everyone please stay seated and pay very close attention." he said in a soft yet venomous tone. The students stopped zipping their bags and their shuffling of papers being stuffed into their folders and binders. Thorin swears to Mahal that he saw Thranduil getting a kick out of his students fear.  
  
~  
  
Thorin couldn’t believe the amount of homework that his English professor gave him on the first week of school! Unbelievable! To read almost two chapters a day, which he would love to add that each chapter is fifty pages each, and his professor decided to give them a research paper to do that's due by next week! A research paper of all things! A bloody research paper that they should be doing by the end of their semester. He knew that he was going to struggle so bad in this class now.  
  
_There's no way that I can do all this homework and reading without sacrificing rugby practice!_ He needs help and fast! There was no way that he was going to skip out rugby to do a stupid ass research paper that would take hours and hours doing. He goes to the cafeteria to get something to calm down his stomach. He wasn't too sure what he ordered because his mind was completely somewhere else when he spotted a head of honey curls hunching over on the table. He recognized those curls anywhere; Bilbo Baggins who was enjoying his plateful of food.  
  
_Should I go up there and sit with him? Or should I just sit somewhere else. I don't want to seem desperate...but I am desperate. Oh fuck it!_  
  
"Is this seat taken?" asked Thorin while he blushed profusely. Bilbo choked on his pastry from being startled and quickly drank his tea.  
  
"Thorin! You scared me!"  
  
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." he said as he was already taking a seat next to Bilbo.  
  
"How was your class?"  
  
"Ugh! I have the worst professor in the whole university! He loves to humiliate his students and he's already given us a shit ton of homework." Thorin grumbled.  
  
"Wow! That sounds like it's going to be a stressful class," said Bilbo. Bilbo chewed on his overstuffed sandwich. Thorin couldn't help but to stare at him, he pictured him as a bunny happily eating his food with stuffed cheeks. He saw why Bilbo was so chubby, eating all these sweets and big sandwiches. Some people thought it would be gross to see a person eat so much, especially if they were chubby, but to Thorin it was endearing to see Bilbo so happy when he ate. He heard him happily munching on his sandwich and notices that his cheeks are big like a chipmunk. _Mahal, why does he have to be so cute?_  
  
"So what happened to Dwalin's literature class?" Bilbo asked. Oh shit! He completely forgot that he made up that excuse to talk to him, he had to think of something quick.  
  
"Uhm he decided to drop that class. He wants to leave all the harder subjects for last,” he said. _Well it’s not a lie…_  
  
"Oh. Well that's too bad cause my friend Ori actually had a really good book for him to read."  
  
They continued with their conversation talking about how Thorin gets a bit peeved on how loud Dwalin's music was while Bilbo told him that his roommate leaves yarn and threads on the floor. Bilbo told him how frustrated he was about taking developmental math courses in order to get over his general stuff, which was so ridiculous because he’s studying to be a writer so why the hell does he need to take math? Thorin told him more about his rude English professor and how worried he was that he'll have to skip out rugby this semester. They talk of a lot of things and found that even though that their interests were opposites, they continued to talk as if they’ve been the closest friends since childhood.  
  
Thorin's phone went off and opened up to see a text from Dwalin. Dwalin texted him something about a cute red hair that he saw in the library and Thorin couldn't help but roll his eyes and whispered something in his native tongue. Bilbo caught it when Thorin spoke in his language and couldn't help but to ask, "What did you say?"  
  
"Oh nothing. My friend is just being dumb."  
  
"But you said it in your language. What did you say?" Bilbo asked eagerly. Thorin had always known that Bilbo loved to learn new things and those were just one of the many reasons why Thorin was even more infatuated with him.  
  
"I just said he was an idiot."  
  
Bilbo giggled and told him that he admired his deep friendship with Dwalin. Thorin blushed all the way down to his neck and shrugged the compliment off, but really his heart was all mush inside.  
  
~  
  
Bilbo couldn't believe that Thorin decided to sit with him at lunch. He honestly couldn’t believe his luck, I mean c'mon he's seen his crush twice and decides to sit next to him?! Yes! Bilbo Baggins felt like the luckiest person in the world right now. He glanced over his plateful of food and suddenly blushed with shame. It was so embarrassing how much he eats, but he couldn’t help himself if he were to be honest. His mother and father always doted him and gave him as much food as he wanted cause it gave him comfort. Of course, it wasn't always junk food, but his mother always had a soft spot for him and gave him the occasional sweets which was most likely what developed his chubby belly. Bilbo didn’t want to think what Thorin might’ve thought of him by seeing how much food he'd already eaten. Like any other athlete that Bilbo had come across with, Thorin probably thought that Bilbo's belly was gross and what he was eating was gross too.  
  
"Bilbo?"  
  
"Hm? Yes?"  
  
"Are you okay? I kind of lost you there for a second."  
  
"Oh yes uhm... I'm sorry what did you say again?"  
  
"I was asking you if you could help me with my English course. You see...I was never good at any English cause I still have a bit of a language barrier, but I know how smart you are in English and I was wondering if you could possibly help me this semester?"  
  
_Stay calm Bilbo! He's just asking if you could help him tutor you; he's not asking you out on a date or anything...not like he would though, look at yourself! You're so gross and ugly._  
  
"Yes of course I would help. I would do anything for a friend....we are friends right?"  
  
Bilbo saw the hesitancy in his eyes and started to regret his question. Thorin saw his worried expression and immediately said of course we're friends with one of his charming smiles that had him melting.  
  
"I only have one condition though."  
  
"Name it."  
  
"During our lessons, in return, I would like for you to teach me your language." said Bilbo. Deep down the reason why he wanted to learn Khuzdul was because he wanted him and Thorin to talk a little more freely without anyone understanding a word of what they were saying or eavesdropping on them. Even though the reason for Bilbo is for him to become much closer to Thorin. He was paranoid that someone will eavesdrop on what they will be talking about. He'd dealt with his fair share of bully's who loved to gossip and pick up any information that Bilbo had said to his friends and twisted his words. And it didn’t help that most of Bilbo's family were nothing but a bunch of gossipers. They practically lived off each other’s drama especially Lobeila, who was so snooty and thought that she was some sort of grand duchess and thought that she should own Bag End. So, having been surrounded by nothing but parrots who squawk and fluff up their feathers when someone caused drama, it would ease Bilbo's mind if none of those people would know what he's talking about.  
  
Thorin looked at him with almost disbelief.  
  
"I find your language to be very interesting Thorin and as a person who loves languages I can't help but feel that I would love to start learning yours." Bilbo can feel himself blushing all the way to the tip of his ears. He does want to teach Thorin and help him with his English class in any way he can, but that damn Took side of his wants him to be selfish and thinks it would be a clever idea if he asked Thorin to teach him his native language just to be with him a little bit longer.  
  
"So do we have a deal then?" Bilbo asked sticking his hand out. Thorin grasped his hand with a firm squeeze. _Oh, Yavanna his hands are so big and warm and rough; merciful the things he can do to me with these hands... wait what? Damn Took side!_  
  
"We most certainly do." Thorin said with the biggest grin he has ever pulled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I hope you all are doing well. I present to you chapter 3 and I'm very happy that I'm releasing this chapter a lot quicker than last time (even though I should be doing my algebra homework, but bagginshield is a little more important at the moment). As always I hope you enjoy this story and wish luck to these blushing oblivious boys who have serious communication issues, I mean jfc just tell Bilbo that you like him! lol <3
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

Sweat was glistening on his skin. His lungs were burning, his heart was pumping, grass blades were sticking on his thighs and his eyes were focused on the ball from the opposing team. The opponent was coming close to the goal and it was Thorin's job to tackle him. He was approaching and his other players were trying to catch up but were not quite there yet. Thorin saw him and decided to make his move. He lunged at his opponent like a predator and landed on him. He took hold of his waist and slammed him on the ground then immediately let’s go of him.  

"Good job Thorin!" shouted Coach Bard. Thorin nodded and helped his fellow teammate to stand.   

"You're getting a lot better at tackling Thorin," his teammate said, "and tell Dwalin to stop glaring at us like that and to save it for the actual games, he's freaking us out."  

"Thanks," Thorin said shyly while looking away, "and uh I'll let him know." He looked over and saw most of his team slowly shuffling away from Dwalin. Thorin shook his head and chuckled a bit, sometimes his friend can be too intense. 

Thorin saw his English professor waiting in the shade of the big oak tree that stood out from the field. His white gold hair is no longer in a low ponytail and he was dressed like he was ready to go on a date. One of his teammates saw him and decided to ask the professor if he needed anything. It only took a moment until he came back to the field. He went to coach Bard and whispered something in his ear. Thorin had heard from his previous teammates that professor Thranduil and coach Bard have been dating for some time now. Coach Bard excused his team to take a 15-minute break from training so he could talk to Professor Thranduil. Thorin would never understand what his coach sees in his English professor who acts like the king of the world. He went over to his bag and grabbed his water bottle and took three big gulps of water feeling immensely better. He checked his phone and saw two text messages from Bilbo. He could feel his face flush again and this time it wasn’t from running around and tackling his teammates.   

 _Hello Thorin! It's Bilbo and I was just wondering when you'll be available for our tutoring lessons. I can do Fridays and weekends and a little bit on Wednesday. -B_  

 _Just let me know. Have a nice day. :) -B_   

Sweet Mahal was this really happening? He re-read the texts over and over again making sure that it was real. Reading those messages sent Thorin's imagination running wild. What would it be like to be Bilbo's boyfriend? If he ever had the opportunity he would spoil him rotten, giving him whatever he wanted or desired and would shower him gold and diamonds. He would save money and show him all the sites and his secret places in his small country. He would introduce him to his grandmother and he knew that she would adore him if she ever met him. He would give him all the love he deserved and give him hugs and comfort him whenever he needed it. He would kiss him and call him ghivashel and amrâlimê every day. He would let Bilbo braid his hair and have him pick out any beads to clasp his braid. He would hold his soft hands in public to show off to his people to let them know that yes this is my beautiful boyfriend and he is perfect in every way and he is mine and you can't have him. He would lean his forehead against his in public, he laughs thinking how if he did that act in his grandmother's time it would've been scandalous. He knew, oh so well, that Bilbo would have him wrapped around his finger if he looked at him ever so sweetly. 

"Thorin!" shouted Dwalin. Thorin snapped out of his fantasies. 

"Yeah?" 

"I've been calling you for a while and I kinda lost you there, you okay?" 

"Yeah I'm fine. I was just thinking."  _Thinking about how I could shower Bilbo with all my affection and make him as happy as possible._  

"Well stop thinking and get back out on the field; our break is over." Dwalin headed out to the field with the rest of his teammates. Thorin unlocked his phone and sent a quick text to Bilbo. He took one more swig of water and retied his hair into a tight bun.  

"Now that we're all here, I would like to make an announcement," said coach Bard "Since our last team captain graduated we obviously need a new one. I have been watching you play and we still need some polishing up to do before we can compete with our competitors. I will determine who will be the next team captain by observing how you play, how you act with your teammates and how you train. If I see any of these qualities I will make you team captain." 

Thorin's chest swelled and was ready more than ever to prove that he can be a good leader and be a good team captain. Also, he does want to show off his strength and leadership skills to Bilbo hoping that it would impress him. 

~  

Bilbo exhaled when he sent his text to Thorin. He couldn't believe that by just sending a message to Thorin was going to be this exhilarating and scary. Half of his mind says that he hoped he doesn't get it and wonders if he was too formal. The other half is super ecstatic that he sent it and hoped that he gets a reply as quickly as possible. He knows that Thorin was most likely at rugby practice. _He's probably sweaty by now. I wonder if his hair is tied up? Maybe it’s in a bun? I wonder how shorts those rugby shorts are?_   Just by thinking it sent shivers down his spine. He giggled and tossed his phone on his nightstand.  

His roommate Ori noticed that Bilbo had been acting different as soon as he saw his friend blushing like crazy from sending a text to someone and giggling like a schoolgirl. Yes, Bilbo was usually a generally happy person but there was something that was making him even more happier than usual. He noticed that he was humming cheerfully to himself, smiling more than usual and sweet merciful he was so cheery in the morning, which never happened because Bilbo Baggins had never been a morning person, and Ori saw more romance novels on his desk. By seeing the romance books on his desk Ori already had an idea that his roommate Bilbo had a crush on someone and not just a small middle school crush; this was a serious deep infatuation. This began to worry Ori, now that he had a good idea on why Bilbo had been so cheery as of late, because Bilbo had two conflicting personalities. One side was precisely logical and always on time and never late for dinner and always thinks first before taking any action; while his other personality was mischievous and adventurous and listened more to his feelings. Bilbo called his logical personality his Baggins side, which he always said he got it from his father, while his adventurous personality was what he called his Took side, where he got it from his mother. 

Ori had seen both personalities work together in harmony which made Bilbo… well Bilbo, but he got the feeling that both personalities won't work together in this situation that Bilbo seemed to be in. He worries for his friend because he obviously doesn't want to see him hurt and he definitely doesn't want Bilbo to blame himself for not listening to his Baggins side. But it seemed as of now his Took side had taken over and loved the feel of having a crush on someone.  

"So uhm Bilbo?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Oh, I was just wondering if you were okay...you know if there's anything on your mind." 

"Anything on my mind? What do you mean?"  _The only thing on my mind is Thorin's thick thighs and sweaty hair and wondering if my messages were casual enough..._  

"Oh nothing, I was just wondering is all." Ori said with a smile. He knows that he shouldn't pry and let Bilbo tell him in his own time. He told him that he was heading off to the library. Bilbo was alone in his dorm and continued reading his novel until he heard a text notification. He felt warm all over his face to the tip of his ears.  

 _At rugby practice now. Fridays and weekends are good for me. You have a good day too. -T_  

He couldn’t stop grinning. He clutched the phone to his chest, thinking about the text he got from Thorin and he could practically hear his deep smooth voice just by reading the text. _Should I reply back? Would that be too much? Damn! What should I wear on Friday?_ His thoughts immediately stopped when he thought about what he should wear to when he would go to tutoring. He got off his bed and went straight to the full body mirror that Ori had.  

It took him a moment to let everything sink in. It wasn’t something he hadn't seen before, but it was something he hated. He truly did hate how he looked. Why couldn't his hair be straight just like everyone else? He tugs at the hem of his shirt and wonders if he should buy an outfit. He was never the type to be trendy, but now that he was going to be with Thorin on Friday, he was starting to feel the weight of his self-esteem on his shoulders. But Bilbo knew that he would always get embarrassed when he would go clothes shopping. Every piece of clothing that was his taste just never seemed to fit him. They were never built for his body and it's just embarrassing. Everything always looked better on the racks or someone with a better body than his. Nothing ever looked good on him when he tried any outfits on. He hated his tummy, he hated his thighs, he hated his bum, he just hated everything about his body to the way his face looked to the way his curls will never be tamed. Ugh! And those glasses! Yavanna, how he hated his glasses! His glasses was the cherry on top to his low self-esteem.  

 _Maybe I should wear contacts._   

Bilbo felt the tears trying to break free, but he wasn't going to cry. No, not again. He was so tired of crying whenever he looked at himself in the mirror. He closed his novel and opened his drawer to grab a fresh new notebook and began to write notes for Thorin's lesson.  

 _I'll worry about what to wear later. Right now, taking notes is what's most important._  

~ 

Rugby practice was finally over and Thorin's teammates were heading straight for the showers or to their dorms. He grabbed his blue towel and wiped the sweat from his brow. He hoped that he did his best on impressing coach Bard. He truly does want to be a team captain and he thinks that he can make this team better.  

"Hey! So, on Friday I was thinking we could catch that movie we've been wanting to see."  

"Sorry Dwalin, I got plans that day." 

"What you? Seriously? On a Friday night? What you got a girlfriend or something?" 

"No. I just have to catch up on some homework and I asked someone to help me with them." 

"You? Asking for help? Are you okay?" Dwalin covered Thorin's head with his hand thinking he's gotten a fever of some sort because there's no way in hell that Thorin Durin ever asked for help; there were times that Dwalin offered to help but he believes that it was Thorin’s stubborn pride that doesn’t allow him to ask for help. Thorin chuckled and shoved his hand away from him. 

"Well okay then. I'll just go with one of my mates; you have fun on Friday. Mahal be with whoever is gonna be helping you." 

"Don't worry I'm going to have a lot of fun."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> PS: I wanted to add how dwarfs court since I've read so many fanfics of these two and I think it's so sweet how dwarfs display their affections for each other so that's where the whole braiding and forehead touching comes into play. <3
> 
> ghivashel- treasure of all treasures  
> amrâlimê- my love


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I hope you're all doing well in life. I'm so sorry that this chapter has taken almost three weeks to be uploaded. My math class has been draining me mentally and emotionally (math just really fucking sucks at the moment). But I am proud of myself that this chapter is almost 3k. If some of you haven't noticed each chapter is 2k so this chapter almost made it to 3k! :D Idk why that makes me happy, but it does lol. 
> 
> THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE KUDOS BY THE WAY! I seriously thought this story wasn't good enough and I thought it was only going to get at least 20, but it's almost at 130! Thank you so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
> 
> I hope you all enjoy reading about these two cute hopeless fools. Happy reading. <3

Bilbo had his bus ticket ready in his pocket and looked at himself in the mirror. He sighed and reassured himself that what he’s doing was the right thing. He'd always wanted to do this and back then he just never had the time. But he's in college so now he finally found the time to do so. He laced up his shoes and was about to head to the door when his roommate Ori stepped in.  

"Bilbo, where are you going?" Ori asked. 

"I have an eye doctor's appointment today." 

"Really? When did you find time to schedule an appointment when the semester just started?" 

"I find some time to squeeze an appointment in. It's not like I'm going to be late for class. Besides, it's just a short visit is all." 

"Oh. Are you getting new frames?" Ori asked while he settled into the dorm. _Yavanna why is he so nosy?_   

"No. I'm going to get contacts." And he left it at that and he was out the door in a flash.  

He arrived at his eye doctor with little trouble. The waiting room was quaint with only two hanging pictures of green fields and a small potted plant hidden in the corner. The nurse receptionist eyes looked dull as she was filing through papers and he could hear the light murmurs from the other nurses behind the receptionist.  

 _I should've brought a book with me._  

Bilbo was getting bored quick and it was only five minutes. The telly was on but the reception was horrible. It created strange hues on the screen and there were statics every so often. Bilbo and an elderly couple were the only ones in the waiting room. He could hear the slight snore from the woman's husband and wished that he could fall asleep that easily, maybe then he could kill time. The room made Bilbo a bit anxious. The sound of the statics from the telly hissed every five minutes. It seemed that it made everyone in the office tick, so the receptionist grabbed the remote and shut it off. She cursed not so quietly and continued with her paperwork. The nurses from the back were gone and the receptionist began scrolling through her phone. The room was now eerily quiet; the only noise in the room was the clock ticking. Bilbo checked his wristwatch and saw that he was probably going to be a bit late for his Advance English class. His Baggins side was a real stickler for being on time and so far this doctor was making him lose his patience.  

"Bilbo Baggins?" said the nurse that came out through the old creaky door. 

"Here." 

"The doctor will see you now." 

Bilbo sat on the chair and started to twiddle his fingers. Inside the room was cold and the hum of the lights made him even more anxious than the waiting room. Doctors and hospitals or just about anything that prodded or poked at his skin gave him the creeps. He'd always struggled going to the eye doctor since he was a child. He used to hate how they had to dilate his eyes with those nasty yellow eye drops; it just felt unnatural. Well, anything feels unnatural when someone is poking or shining bright lights on your eyes.

The doctor came in with a clipboard in hand and said without looking up, "Hello. I'm Dr. Wood. So, Mr. Baggins what can I do for you today?" Bilbo gave Dr. Wood a once over, he was lanky and had salt and pepper hair. His eyes looked tiresome and he had bags under his eyes. His dingy white lab coat looked wrinkled like he just rolled out of bed. 

Bilbo was so tempted to roll his eyes. _Well obviously, I came in to get contact lenses as you probably see on your clipboard which you probably skimmed through and not haven't been reading it properly._

"I'm here to get some contact lenses. My eyeglasses are becoming a bother and I want some contacts, I think they'll be easier." 

"Well I just have to measure your eyes and we'll see what we can do for you." He brought his biomicroscope close to Bilbo so that he can inspect the surface of his eyes. Bilbo could feel his eyes desperate to blink. He felt as if the light was drying out his eyes. He could feel his lashes touching the scope and the doctor told him repeatedly to keep them open. Bilbo almost told him off, but he figured that the doctor wouldn’t really give a rat’s ass of what he thought. _Yavanna, I just want this to be over with. I want to look so good for him on Friday._ The doctor was finally done with his inspection and scribbled down a few notes on his clipboard.  

"Well we're all done Mr. Baggins. You'll be getting your contacts on Friday morning, is that fine?" 

"Yes! That's perfectly fine! Are there any side effects that I need to worry about?" 

"The side effects would be listed on the box.”

"Oh? Erm...alright then?" Bilbo wasn't sure what else to say so he decided not to say anything else. Dr. Wood looked incredibly tired and he almost told him that he should go home and get some sleep, but his Baggins side told him it would be rude to tell a doctor what to do and left his mother henning to himself. The anxiousness of being inside the building made Bilbo get out of the doctor’s room as quickly and quietly as he could.

He made it to the bus stop and got bus ticket ready. Bilbo checked his watch and saw that he would be able to make it to his class. The bus arrived right on time, which Bilbo loved, and swiped his bus card and took his seat by the window that was close to door. He saw the people passing by going about their daily routines and allowed his mind to wander. _I hope I look a little better without my glasses. Maybe I should buy a new outfit?_  He reached into his pocket and looked through his wallet. There was only a few notes inside his wallet, so definitely not enough to buy a new outfit. He let out a disappointed sigh and slipped his wallet back into his pocket. _Well I guess I have to make use of what I have._  

~ 

Bilbo was out of his last class for the day and was tired to the bones. He opened his dorm and plopped unceremoniously on his bed. He sighed deeply and shut his eyes for a moment thinking that he should decide on what to wear for his tutoring lesson with Thorin.  

 _Shit. What's he going to wear? I hope it'll be casual. Yavanna what on earth am I going to do?_  He saw that Ori's closet was ajar and decided to take a slight peak inside. Most of Ori's outfits were knitted sweaters and he had so many fingerless gloves! But way in the back he could saw some nicer looking clothes and took them out. He went to the full-length mirror and checked to see if any of Ori's clothes will look good on him. Bilbo didn't even have to put them on, he could already tell that just by his unmanageable curls, thick thighs and his ugly plump belly that these clothes, no matter how aesthetically gorgeous they were, were not suited nor his style. He huffed and puts them away gently.  

He looked through his closet and grimaced when he sees his sweater vests. Ugh! _Don't I have any clothes that don't look like saying to the entire fucking world that I'm a big loser?!_ He searched through his hangers to his boxes, that were on the bottom, to even his laundry! He was desperate! He saw a box on top of the hangers and stood on his tippy toes to reach for it. He managed to grab it until all the books he'd stored up there, because he can't have a huge library case in his already small dorm, came tumbling down. Bilbo rubbed his sore head and looked to see if his books weren’t damaged. The box's lid came off and there were some clothes that spilled out. He unwrapped them and picked off the leftover lint that was clinging on to them. He gave them a good look and decided that it was better than nothing and a lot better than his sweater vests. Bilbo almost puts them back into the box when he spied a journal inside. He'd completely forgotten that he brought it along. He gently opened to the first page and saw the note that always makes him cry, 

 _To our darling Bilbo,_    
  
_Write as much as you can and know that we love you very much. Don't be afraid to face the world and to face your feelings. Don't listen to anyone telling you can't do anything because you can my darling. Dream big, love and write down your all of your wonderful adventure._  

 _Much love, Mum and Dad._  

He felt the tears streaming down his face. He immediately closed the journal, but instead of throwing it roughly into the box, like he used to do as a child, and shoving it somewhere deep and dark so he would hope to forget about it, he opened his drawer in his night table and placed it gently inside.   

~ 

Friday had finally arrived and Thorin couldn't be more nervous. He'd showered twice and couldn't decide which braid style he wanted. Yesterday, it took him all day to decide on what to wear for his tutoring day with Bilbo, even though he knew that it wasn't a date but he did want to dress to impress. He settled for fitted ripped jeans and a dark blue shirt hoping that it was casual enough. He tied up his hair into a Dutch braid bun and dabbed a bit of his fanciest cologne on his pulse points.  

His phone beeped and he unlocked to see a text message from Bilbo. _Hello Thorin, it's Bilbo. I just wanted to let you know that we're meeting in the library. I'm already here so there's no rush. See you soon. -B_  

Fuck! Fucking Mahal! He's already there? He looked at himself in the mirror. 

"Okay. Don't fuck this up Thorin. Remember! It's not a date! Don't make him feel uncomfortable and focus! Focus. Focus. Focus." 

Thorin wondered what Bilbo looks like today. _Did he dress nice like I did or did he dress casually? I wonder what sweater vest he wore today. I hope he didn't stress too much over my English notes. Mahal, I hope he was serious about learning my language. Sweet Mahal, I hope he doesn't think my language is stupid or weird sounding._ He rushed to the library hoping that Bilbo hasn't waited too long when he almost ran into Dwalin.  

"Whoa! You look like you're in a hurry." 

"It's probably cause I am." 

"Where're ya heading?" 

"To the library." 

"Why?" 

"I already told you yesterday." 

"Well yes you did, but you didn't say who was gonna help ya?" 

Thorin fought from rolling his eyes. "Why are you being so nosy?" 

"Cause I'm your best friend and I'm always nosy. Plus, you haven’t used that hairstyle since your previous partner. And from the way you're dressed it looks like you're going on a date more so than going to the library for a tutoring lesson." Dwalin said with a wolfish grin.  

"What, I can't dress nice for a day? And since when did you become so observant towards me? It’s fucking creepy." 

"No. You can't dress nice without telling me why you're dressing nice cause you never dress nice unless it's a special occasion or if it's Margelu id-Mehar. And Thorin…we’ve been best friends for a long fucking time, it’s not my fault that I notice these things about ya." 

"Ugh! Dwalin don't you have a movie to get to?" 

"Yeah but that's not until the evening. So, who are you dressing nice for?" 

"Dwalin! I'm already late for my tutoring lesson, so I'll tell you who it is later if you would just move!" Thorin growls. Dwalin puts his hands up and stood aside. He made it to the library and realized that he forgot to ask Bilbo where he was specifically. He shot him a quick text and looked around the library. He passed the computer aisles until his phone beeped.  

 _Sorry, I completely forgot to tell you where to go! I'm on the second floor in the corner. -B_  

Thorin trudged up the stairs and looked to the right and saw his favorite head of honey blonde curls. His heart was fluttering and felt a small tremor in his spine. Bilbo must have felt like he was being watched. He turned around and saw Thorin while giving him a small wave. Thorin noticed something big had changed about Bilbo and he wasn't sure how he felt about it.  

Bilbo wasn't wearing his eyeglasses!  

"Hey Thorin!" Bilbo said. 

"H-Hey. I almost didn't recognize you without your glasses. Where are they?" 

"Oh, they got busted and it'll be a while till I get my new ones. I'm blind as a bat so I decided to get some contacts." he said while rubbing his eyes a bit. Without his eyeglasses, Bilbo looked vastly different for some reason. Thorin noticed that Bilbo already looked frustrated with the contacts and sensed that he was lying to him. He remembered Bilbo was bullied for his eyeglasses and he already missed the quirky looking frames. He felt that Bilbo gave in to the years of mental abuse from high school and that made Thorin sad. But Thorin doesn't say anything to him aloud; they're just starting their friendship and he didn’t want to ruin it by telling him that would make him feel even worse about himself.  

"They look like they’re bothering you though. Do they hurt?" 

"A bit, but I just assume that it takes some getting used to is all," Bilbo gestured Thorin to take a seat next to him, "Please have a seat and we can get started." 

Thorin hoped that Bilbo didn't see his blush _. Mahal, to be so close to Bilbo is making me feel so fucking nervous!_  

~ 

Bilbo suddenly became nervous, but he didn't know why. Didn't Thorin like the way he looked without his eyeglasses? _But then again why should I care? It's not like he cares whether I wear them or not. I'm sure he likes them without them just like everyone else._ He'd changed his look. He wasn’t wearing his dumb looking sweater vests, instead he'd chosen to wear a cream-colored shirt with his dark yellow cardigan that he found in the box, and he'd gotten rid of those gross eyeglasses; the only thing that he tried to change but couldn't were his unruly curls. They both spent almost two hours working on Thorin's research paper and making reading 50 pages, that his anal English professor assigned him, a bit easier. Throughout most of Bilbo's tutoring he kept rubbing his eyes. The contacts felt like a heavy weight on his eyes; they were drying his eyes quicker than before when he first put them on. He hoped that by blinking would at least give his eyes the moisture that they needed, but it never worked and he forgot his contact solution in his dorm.  

"Well I think that about covers most of what we had to do today. I hoped it helped a bit." 

"You've been a tremendous help, I cannot thank you enough Bilbo." Thorin clasped his hand on the groove of Bilbo's shoulder giving a squeeze. Bilbo fought a shiver. _Sweet fucking Yavanna his hands are so big and warm._ Bilbo started to think of his strength and that this wasn't even the surface on how strong he was; Thorin was probably being gentle now but he wanted to see more of that strength in action or him being rough on him or make a straight mess out of him...wait, fucking Took side.  

"So uhm what do we do now?" Thorin asked. 

"Oh! Didn't you promise me to teach me your native language?" Bilbo saw Thorin flush a bit and cracked a smile. 

"U-Uhm okay. I have to warn you though, I'm not a good teacher." Thorin said while rubbing the back of his neck.  

 _He looks kinda nervous. That's so sweet. Hmmm maybe I can tease him just a bit._  

"Not a good teacher? With your smarts and stamina, I'm sure you're a good leader so in my opinion you're going to be a great teacher. And I'm a pretty good student so I think we'll be good." Bilbo gaves him a smirk. He had to hold in his laughter, seeing Thorin blushing all the way down to his neck. Oh, how Bilbo would love to lay light kisses on his thick hot neck.   

"U-U-Uhm... I don't really know where to start exactly." 

"Hmm. Let's start with a few vocabulary words." 

"Alright sounds fair. What would you like your first Khuzdul word to be?" 

 _Love._  
  
"How about friend?" he said feeling his own blush sprouting on his cheeks.

"Khuzsh."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul words:
> 
> Margelu id-Mehar- Celebration of the Creation  
> Khuzsh- friend


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! OH MY GOD IT HAS BEEN A REALLY LONG TIME SINCE I UPDATED HASN'T IT? College is slowly taking over and college algebra literally sucks the joy right out of me. My math professor is so fucking dumb and stupid and I'm gonna have to withdraw from her class, ughh!! T_T
> 
> I hope you all are doing well with your lives so without further ado here is chapter 5 that you have all patiently (thank you so much for your patience by the way) waited. Just so you know this one is kind of angsty which I've never ever written before so I hope I did well.
> 
> Happy reading. <3

It became another hour or so of learning small vocabulary words in Khuzdul. Throughout the tutoring session he'd been stumbling on his Khuzdul words. It took him almost 20 minutes to understand that the consonant of TH was seen as one consonant. In the beginning, it became so very confusing for Bilbo, but Thorin's soft voice of reassurance calmed him. The soft encouragements turned Bilbo into a puddle. He could listen Thorin talk for hours in his language and he wouldn't even care if he could understand him or not. All he wanted was for him to keep talking with his deep voice.  

"I must say that your language is quite a challenge Thorin." Bilbo said. His face was hot and he was sure that his face was as red as his prized tomatoes from back home. Khuzdul wasn't like any other language that Bilbo had faced. The language itself was challenging and the pronunciation of it all was a bit confusing but no less fun for Bilbo who was such a language nerd at heart. Bilbo became a bit infatuated with the Khuzdul language; it was rough and sounded what warriors from ancient times would speak. Bilbo looked at Thorin writing more Khuzdul phrases for him and imagined him as a warrior. He looked the part with his long hair and short beard. _Hmm. Maybe not full armor like a knight but more like a rogue warrior. A fur coat maybe? And-_  

"Bilbo? You alright? I kind of lost you there for a second." Bilbo snapped out of his fantasies and felt flushed. Suddenly his cardigan became too hot and he almost excused himself to ask anyone if they can crank up the A/C.  

"It can be a bit of a challenge for some people, but you're not most people." Thorin said with a wolfish grin on his face. Bilbo started to wonder if it was physically possible for a person to become so red. He wasn’t red as a tomato anymore he was the epitome of the color red.   

"Y-You think so?" 

Thorin looked into his eyes and said, "Yes. I really do." This honesty surprised Bilbo. He'd never heard anyone say anything like that so bluntly. He was, unfortunately, mostly raised from the Baggins side of his family. Nobody was blunt for it was too rude, which was why they stayed far away from the Tooks. His heart was beating so loud and the tips of his ears felt like they were on fire. He looked at Thorin and found himself that he couldn't look him in the eye. Those piercing blue eyes sent his pulse running fast and his legs shaking a bit. He couldn't comprehend how on this good earth that one man could make him feel like this.    

"Does that surprise you?" 

"Yeah it does a bit. No one has ever said that to me before." Bilbo looked down at his horrible Khuzdul handwriting. _Yavanna will someone please turn on the A/C for heaven sake!_  

"Really? I would think a lot of people would think you're different." 

"Different?" Thorin saw his confused face and thought of something quick. He knew he wasn’t good with words, he was no poet but he would become one if that would impress Bilbo. 

"I meant different in a good way. You're really smart and-" Bilbo's stomach interrupted.  _Dammit Bilbo! You should've eaten before you came! Yavanna that was so embarrassing!_ He saw Thorin hiding a smile and saw a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. _Oh, fuck why didn't I eat beforehand?_  

"It sounds like someone is hungry. Do you want to go to the-" 

"No!" Bilbo said quickly. _No! All I want is to go to the nearest exit and hide under my covers! Ugh! He was smiling...probably making fun of me just like everyone else._  

"Are you sure you don't want to get anything to eat?" 

"Yes, I'm sure. I just need to head out now." Bilbo started to stuff his notes into his messenger bag quickly. The hot shame of embarrassment ransacked throughout his body. He knew that he shouldn't feel this way; it was a normal biological reaction, if you're hungry your stomach lets you know.  He knew that Thorin wouldn’t care and not make fun of him because he was Thorin! And from Bilbo’s knowledge, Thorin was honorable and always stuck up for others who couldn’t defend themselves, but why risk it? Why risk getting made fun of again? It was too humiliating to even think of it. Getting bullied over petty high school shit in college? Oh, the embarrassment! He knew that Thorin had a lot more integrity than others and who knows he may not truly care about Bilbo's weight or his unusual style, but Bilbo would rather not know and have his, Mr. Perfect-With-Good-Morals-And Arse and Thighs-And-Not-Give-A-Shit-About-People’s-Weight known as Thorin, as a fantasy.

Bilbo was just tired from the teasing that his friends usually pulled, his relatives and past bullies. He knew this was college where everyone usually minded their own business and kept to themselves. Everyone was too busy worrying how they’re going to pass their college algebra test or wonder how many pages they'll have to do for their next essay or where to buy a dozen kegs for a cheap price for the next frat house party. But Bilbo's past still haunted him every single day. He could still hear the teasing from his friends from elementary school all the way through high school; their so called "light teasing" are still ringing in his ears. Like that one time in recess where Bilbo and his friends were playing. He doesn't remember what they were playing really, children somehow can make up any game and it could either be super fun or can get boring quick. All Bilbo could remember was that he and his friends were running around and Penelope Lincoln, a girl that always wore braids in her hair with different colors of ribbons and wore torn up jeans, slipped on a pile of leaves and landed on Bilbo. All of them came running towards them and asked if they were okay. Penelope told them that she was alright because Bilbo broke her fall and all Bilbo could unfortunately remember was when one of them saying, "Of course you’re alright. Bilbo broke your fall because he's so soft like a pillow and round like one." 

The laughter still echoed in his ears and he hated the fact that as a child he brushed it off, even though he knew that the comment was hurtful; he didn't want them to make fun of him even more if he began to cry, no… that would've made it worse and they would've called him a crybaby, so he laughed with them. 

He could remember his relatives giving him subliminal gifts of how to lose weight with a program that their friend of a friend did and asked him on his birthdays when he was eating cake and ice cream, "Haven't you eaten enough for the day? Try some of this nice hummus and celery that your cousin so and so brought huh?" Ugh! And those awful family reunions that he dreaded every year, his cousins and aunts and uncles telling him that they knew an excellent eye doctor that could help him with his horrible eye sight so he wouldn’t have to wear those glasses anymore. His past bullies shoving and pushing him to the ground. Spitting at his face, laughing at him when he began to run away from them and never getting far from their clutches, and taking away his glasses by putting their arms high into the sky making him jump for it just for a few good laughs.  

Yes, most certainly not worth knowing if Thorin was going to tease or laugh at chubby Bilbo for being hungry. 

"Are you sure though? Cause I know a cafeteria we could go to." Thorin said worryingly.  

"Nope! I'm completely fine. I just need to head back to my dorm and uhm study a bit more for my classes next week." _Oh, Yavanna I hope that was convincing enough. Just please, please let it go and don't make fun of me._  

Thorin's piercing blue eyes looked at his green ones and nodded. 

"Okay. I'll see you-" Bilbo didn't even let Thorin finish, he just wanted to leave as quickly as possible. He ran down the steps as quietly as possible which he failed immensely because he sounded like a horse galloping down the stairs. He pushed the doors open and took a breath full of air till his lungs started to hurt. He could feel the tears starting to break free from his eyes. Ah yes, sweet relief. Perhaps this will help keep a bit of moisture in his eyes from those awful contacts. He allowed his salty tears pour down his cheeks. His eyes start to sting and he kept his head down as he began to walk towards his dorm. He hoped to Yavanna that Ori wasn't there, he didn’t want him to be pestering him with a bunch of questions; especially now that he knows that his eyes were going to be red and puffy from crying. 

~ 

What. The. Fuck just happened? One moment ago, Thorin was having a good time with Bilbo. One moment ago, he was finally feeling relaxed and didn't stress about essays and wondering how he'll impress Coach Bard to be a good captain for his rugby team. One moment ago, he was happy that someone else wanted to learn his strange language. One moment ago, Bilbo was hungry and seemed upset about it and left in a hurry leaving Thorin Durin dumbfounded. He didn't understand why he was upset. Thorin thought everything was going well and he was so close to asking Bilbo to see him tomorrow on Saturday to hangout. Dammit! Why couldn't he just tell Bilbo sooner than later? 

 _Fuck! Did I mess up? Was I making him uncomfortable? FUCK!_  He slammed his hands on the table so hard that it echoed across the library. The act startling everyone and making them look around to see what caused it. He grabbed his notebook and the loose-leaf notes in a tight fist. He stormed out the library clenching his notebook tightly passing by all the college students with haste. He didn't know where he was heading and quite frankly he didn't give a damn as long as it wasn’t in that godforsaken library. His mind lead him towards the field where he saw Dwalin hanging out with some of his mates from class. Dwalin saw Thorin and excused himself.  

"Hey! How'd your tutoring session go? I bet it was-" Dwalin looked at his best friend with his brows furrowed. What happened? Thorin’s eyes were steely and cold. "Whoa. What happened? Are you okay?" 

"No! I'm not okay!" 

"Take it easy. Tell me what happened." 

"No! I don't want to talk about it! What are you doing now?" 

"I was hanging with my mates. We were just killing time before we head off to the movies. Thorin are-" 

"Fuck the movies! You and I are gonna train, now!" 

"Train? For what?" 

"For what? For rugby! C'mon! We have to train now!" 

"Thorin!" Dwalin shouted. Thorin was pacing, he untied his braid and let his hair fall. He ran a hand through his hair making it a tangled mess. He looked at Dwalin with wild eyes. Dwalin could see that Thorin wasn't thinking straight and whatever had him riled up wasn't going to blow over in a few minutes or a few hours. Nope. He was going to have to deal with him moping around for a week before he swallowed his stubborn attitude and tell him what had happened.  

He took a deep breath. "Dwalin. I don't want to talk about it. I just want to train...please." 

Dwalin didn’t say anything. Whatever had happened to him, shouting and repeating himself on asking what was going on with him wasn’t going to make things better. All Dwalin knew was that tackling and tumbling around the field was going to help Thorin. He didn’t say anything to him, his silence was his answer and Thorin was grateful for it. Dwalin went off to his friends who were looking at what was happening across the field. He told them that he couldn’t make it to the movie and promised them that next time he would go.  

"Alright before we start training, why don't we go to the dorm so you can change. I don't want to hear you whining about how you don't have nice clothes in case you get a date." He put his arms around his shoulders and lead him toward their dorm. Thorin didn’t say anything. He still couldn't understand why he was so upset. In fact, he didn't remember why he became upset in the first place. All he felt was anger and frustration.  

~ 

Bilbo lied on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He'd already taken off his contacts and wore his ugly glasses. His eyes stopped stinging and he'd taken off his clothes and was in his pajamas.  

 _Ugh! That was so rude of me! I left Thorin like that. I should apologize to him....ugh but what if he's angry and doesn't want to talk to me after I left him like that?_  He looks at his cellphone and begins to type. 

"Ugh! How should I start?" 

 _Thorin. I'm so sorry that I ran out like that. I wasn't feeling good._   

"No. That doesn't sound right." 

 _I'm an arsehole!_  

"Oh, good Yavanna no that sounds awful!" 

 _Thorin. The reason why I left in such a hurry is because I hate myself and the way I look and I wasn't sure if you were making fun of my fat self for being hungry because what fat kid isn't always hungry, right?_  

"Shit. I can't tell him that. He would just make fun of me even more and he’d probably think I'm a big sissy for feeling this way." He rubbed his eyes and chucked his phone away from him. He had to think of something but he couldn't think of anything on an empty stomach _. Ugh! Damn my stomach!_  

"Hello! Anyone home?" Ori asked with two paper bags in his hands.  

"Ori? What is all this?" 

"Takeout! I finally got paid and I thought we could treat ourselves to some Italian food!"  

"I didn't know you had a job. Where do you work?" 

"I work at the fabric store a couple of blocks from here." Ah that would explain the abundance of yarn all over their dorm. The smell of garlic bread and alfredo sauce was filling the dorm. Warm buttery oily garlic bread all nicely wrapped up in shiny aluminum foil. The nice white thick creamy alfredo sauce with probably a lot of fettucine pasta with lots and lots of chicken was plopped into the black container, his mouth began to water and all he wanted was to eat whatever Ori gives him.

 _He's so soft like a pillow and round like one!_  

Damn. One of these days if Bilbo ever saw that kid again in his life, he was going to punch his nose so hard. 

"Actually Ori. I'm not hungry." 

"What? Oh c'mon, it's Italian! Surely you can make room! Are you sure?" 

"Yeah I'm sure. I'm not hungry."

_Yup. Not hungry at all whatsoever._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> P.S: Thank you all so much for the kudos! 171?! Seriously? I still can't believe that number haha. Thank you all so much for your positive comments and your patience, it truly does make me happy. I love you all. <3 <3 <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Wow, it's been a while since I updated again hasn't it? I'm so sorry! A lot of things just got in my way. My depression is still lingering about and college isn't making it any easier. I decided to withdraw from my college algebra class cause this math professor is such a piece of crap and my math anxiety keep sky rocketing. Plus, it's been an emotional weekend for me. Friendships are a real hassle when you're the only one who's putting 100% of the effort and not receiving anything back from them. Anyways, let's just get on with the story. It's still kind of angsty (I guess cause I really don't know how to write angst lol) but I promise you there are going to be happy times with our lovable dorks that just need to tell each other that they like one another and go on a really cute date and watch movies and eat buttery popcorn!
> 
> Happy reading. <3
> 
> PSS: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE KUDOS! It still shocks me how much love there is for this story. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!

It was Monday morning and Ori was starting to worry about Bilbo. On Friday, when he brought home Italian takeout, he didn't think that Bilbo was going to refuse. I mean c'mon, who can ignore Italian food? All the savory buttery garlic bread dipped in alfredo sauce, how could Bilbo refuse? But Friday didn't worry him that much because Bilbo did say that he wasn't hungry so he just assumed that Bilbo had already eaten. It was the rest of the weekend that started to make Ori worry profusely about his roommate.  

~ 

Saturday. 

Once they both woke up Ori asked Bilbo what had happened yesterday. He could tell that something was bothering him but didn't want to ask him because as soon as he opened his box of shrimp alfredo pasta he was wolfing it down. Bilbo told Ori that he was helping someone with their English homework and that it didn't go well which was why he was a bit upset. Ori didn't pry on it any further and decided to drop the subject. Instead he told him about the handsome rugged man that he's been seeing in the library. Bilbo looked like he was paying attention, but his eyes told a different story. They were dulled and glassy. Ori knew that he wasn't listening to him; he was far away from where they were.  

Everything seemed to go fine until it was time for lunch. They still had a lot of leftover Italian food since Bilbo didn't have any. Bilbo chose to skip lunch and told Ori that he had a lot on his mind and was going to have a late lunch, but that wasn't the case. Okay, skip Italian food once but twice? Italian was one of Bilbo's favorite and he's just going to skip it? He kept a close eye on Bilbo from that point on. Later in the day Ori heard a lot of noise from the other side of his room.  

"Hey Bilbo! Everything okay out there?" Ori asked. 

"Yes! Sorry for all the ruckus. Everything is fine though!" 

The noise became a bit too loud for his taste and was going to ask Bilbo if he could do whatever he was doing another time or tone it down a bit. He opened his door leaving a small crack to see what was going on. He saw that Bilbo was pulling out all of his sweets and food out of the fridge. He heard him grumbling to himself. Ori was straining to listen to what he was saying but couldn't make out what he was mumbling to himself. Sweets after sweets and bags after bags of food were all being put away into a large black garbage bag. Ori decided not to say anything. He closed his door and left him alone. 

Ori was hunching over his text book and was scribbling down some notes for his class. He heard Bilbo calling out to him saying that he was going to the library to return a few books that he had borrowed. When Bilbo left to go to the library, Ori was all alone and all that could be heard was the paced ticking sound of the clock that hung on his wall. Ori had been studying all day and was beginning to feel parched. He had many water bottles under his bed since there was no room to put them anywhere else in their dorm. He grabbed one and noticed that it was a bit warm to his liking. He went over to his mini fridge and saw that there was no room so he crept over to Bilbo's mini fridge to stock it in to cool. He recalled Bilbo taking out all of his food and sweets out and thought that maybe he was just cleaning out the fridge, so there should obviously should be enough room to store one water bottle, right? Ori opened the fridge and expected to see some food stocked in there until that was when he noticed that inside the fridge there was nothing but baby carrots and celery.  

Ori already had a feeling that Bilbo was going on some hardcore diet and he was wondering if he should have a serious talk with him. Dinner came along and Ori tried to convince him to eat some pasta, but again Bilbo refused and ate his celery instead.  

~ 

Sunday. 

Ori had had enough of Bilbo's diet. All he did was wake up, eat his baby carrots and celery, read, finish up some homework and studying, and drank a shit ton of green tea. Ori searched the web to see why Bilbo was drinking so much green tea. It turned out that green tea increased fat burning and improved physical performance, but with the way Bilbo looked it didn't do him any good. Bilbo became restless and grouchy and he was always napping, like he was too tired to do anything cause he didn't have the energy anymore. He knew it was because he didn't eat anything other than those baby carrots and celery, but even then, he was drinking more green tea than his small portion sized vegetables.  

Ori had enough of this nonsense. 

"Bilbo, we need to talk." Bilbo was laying on his bed looking more tired than ever. His eyes were still glassy and dull looking. His brows furrowed and there were black circles under his eyes like he hadn't slept in days. 

"What do you want to talk about?" 

"I think you know." 

"Uhm. No I don't. Ori-" 

"Bilbo! You haven't been eating!"  

Bilbo sat up quickly and shouted, "Yes, I have! I've been eating just fine!" 

"No! Eating baby carrots and celery all day isn't what I call a healthy eating habit! You're in denial if you think you're eating right Bilbo!" 

"No! You're wrong! I'm done talking about this!" He got up from his bed and grabbed his scarf and sweater off his hangers. 

"Where are you going?" 

"Away from here!" 

"Bilbo! Bilbo come ba-" But Bilbo already left and slammed the door leaving Ori alone in their dorm 

Bilbo drank his third green tea for the day. He'd been browsing all over the web on how to lose weight as quickly as possible. He didn’t have time to go to the gym because of all the classes that he's been taking. The load of homework alone could possibly make someone rip their own hair out, the endless essays that he knew that had nothing to do with writing his adventure stories, and reading hundreds of pages was already time consuming enough that adding to go to a gym would just tire him out.  

 _"You're in denial if you think you're eating right Bilbo!"_  

Okay, yeah that one kind of hurt. Bilbo's Tookish side literally came out of nowhere when he shouted back at him. He didn't mean to. But he noticed that Ori had been watching him like a hawk when he started on his diet. Now that he thought about it, he had been grouchy lately for the past two days. He was already so sick and tired of eating carrots and celery but he couldn’t stop now. He weighed himself this morning and noticed that he did lose a few pounds, but even he knew that it was just water weight, so he had to keep eating carrots and celery and drink green tea every day to at least get close to his goal.  

He wanted to be thin and fit just like everyone else. Every time he went to the mall to at least try some clothes on there wasn't a young model that was plastered inside the stores that were his size. No. They were all usually Thorin's size. Tall, angled jaws, thick rippling muscles, the perfect V shaped body that Bilbo wanted but couldn’t achieve. He thought that he could try working out in his dorm, but there wouldn't be any privacy since Ori was there at the same time when Bilbo got out of his classes. And he didn’t want to feel embarrassed if Ori saw him working out and would see his flabby imperfections; plus, where would he get the money to buy basic gym equipment? And where would he put them all? Bilbo just couldn't win.  

His feet led him to the library, but he couldn't face going back in there. The whole situation that he created between him and Thorin was still fresh and it still hurt. Instead of going to the library, his groggy mind took him someplace else. Where? He really couldn’t give a fuck. He knew for a fact that he didn't want to go to the cafeteria where all the savory and salty and ooey gooey and sweet temptations lie. He trudged toward the field where he saw a few football players training. 

_At least Thorin isn't here._

Bilbo sat on the bleachers and somewhat watched the players rolling around in the dirt. His mind was crackly like tin foil and the bright sun hurt his eyes and head.

 _Damn, I really should've brought a book with me or at least my notebook. Maybe I should go get it back from the dorm._ What Bilbo didn't notice was that one of the players was looking at him, who was Thorin's only closest friend Dwalin.  

He noticed Bilbo in a second with his unruly curly hair and strange looking scarf and sweater. Dwalin did recall that Bilbo did have weird tastes in clothes but he could care less about fashion. His friends took a break from rolling around in the field for most of the day and lied down on the soft grass. For some reason, Dwalin couldn't keep his eyes off Bilbo. Something was off about him. He usually got a cheery vibe whenever he saw Bilbo walking around campus with his super cute red haired friend. Bilbo looked tired...a little too tired for his liking. He looked like he should be in bed and nap for a few hours. Bilbo was about to step off the bleachers and Dwalin was about to shout out his name, hoping that Bilbo would remember him in high school, when suddenly Bilbo lost his footing and fell off the bleachers. 

"Bilbo!" Dwalin shouted. He ran towards him and saw that he wasn't moving. Dwalin's friends came rushing over to see what had happened. He knelt beside him and shook him, "Wake up! Wake up dammit!" 

Bilbo fluttered his eyes open. The bright light making him squint and he could only see the murky shadows of people looking down on him. 

"W-What happened?" Bilbo asked blinking a bit more. He noticed that he couldn't really see anything and thought that he must have dropped his glasses along the way. Dwalin gave him his glasses that were on the ground, thankfully the lenses weren't scratched.  

"You fell off the bleachers. Are you okay?" 

"Sort of. I think I should head back to my dorm now." 

"I'll come with you." 

"N-No. It's alright." 

"I'd feel a lot better if I were to go with you." Bilbo slid his glasses on and realized who he was talking to. 

"Oh wow! Dwalin?" 

"Yeah. Wow. Didn't think you would recognize me." Bilbo laughed lightly and reassured him that he could never forget him, I mean how could he? He was big and intimidating and had tattoos all over him and was always with Thorin as if he were his bodyguard.  

"Just show me where your dorm is and I'll take you there." Bilbo knew that Dwalin was stubborn, but he still waited for Bilbo to give him permission to do so. He said that it was okay for Dwalin to escort him back to his dorm. His friends shared their concern to Bilbo asking him if he needed water or a chocolate bar. A chocolate bar was the last thing that Bilbo wanted. Dwalin told them to bugger off and wait for him so they can play football once he'd escorted him back. Bilbo and Dwalin began to walk to his dorm and started to idly chat and catch up on how they've been doing. Dwalin's friends waited for him to come back when one of them caught sight of Thorin. 

"Hey Thorin! Wanna wait for Dwalin with us and play football?" Thorin looked at him and shook his head. His eyes were callous and he focused on Dwalin with Bilbo. Yeah, he didn’t want to play football with his 'friend' at the moment. 

~ 

They both made it to Bilbo's dorm. The walk seemed to be too much for Bilbo and it took them some time to get there because he had to keep asking Dwalin if they could sit for a bit because he was already starting to feel dizzy. Bilbo grabbed his keys from his pocket and tried to unlock the door, but his hands were too shaky. Dwalin gave him a look and Bilbo, with his head down in shame, willingly gave him the keys and unlocked the door for him.  

"Bilbo! I'm so glad you're back. I'm sorry for shout-" Ori was cut off when he saw his handsome looking man, that he'd been seeing in the library, with Bilbo. 

"Fuck! What happened? Bilbo, are you alright?" 

"He's fine. Just had a slip is all." Dwalin said. Bilbo shrugged off his sweater and scarf and tossed it in the hamper. He'd put it on the hangers later, all he wanted was to go to bed and sleep for a month. Ori held him steady and guided him to his bed. Dwalin stood awkwardly in front of the entrance thinking if he should leave right away or not. Ori quietly closed Bilbo's door and went to Dwalin with a blush rising on his cheeks. 

"U-Uhm. Thank you for looking out for him. That was very nice of you." Ori said while looking down fiddling with his fingers. 

"I-It's not a big deal really. Uhm. I'll see you later?" 

"Yeah. I-I'll see you later." Ori mumbled. Dwalin left in a hurry with his big hands shoved in his pockets. Ori closed the door as quietly as he could to not disturb Bilbo’s sleep. The door was shut and his body started to quiver.

 _Sweet mercy! His arms were huge and inked!_  Ori cupped his face and felt that he was hot. He needed a cold shower stat! 

~ 

Monday morning. 

Bilbo decided not to attend his classes for the day. He realized that eating baby carrots and celery and drinking green tea like a champ wasn't going to do him any good if he felt weak all the time. He was on a scholarship and there was no way that he was going to start doing poorly in his classes cause he was tired. Bilbo made up with Ori and kept apologizing to him about his grouchy self all weekend. 

"I'm really sorry though Ori...truly." 

"Ugh! Please Bilbo, I already told you that I forgive you and accept your apology." 

"Still..." 

"None of that now. I'm heading off to class and I want you to eat that's not carrots or celery. Eat some bread and butter and get lots of sleep, you look absolutely haggard." 

Bilbo sighed and said that he'll eat something. 

"Text me if you need anything. And I mean anything okay?" 

"Alright. Go to class or you'll be late." 

Ori was still worried about him from what has happened to him yesterday and almost told him that he would gladly skip classes for a day too to keep an eye on him, but he trusted that Bilbo will get better now after his accident. He headed off to his class in hope to see his big armed inked man in the library again. The thought of him kept him up all night thinking about his crush's honorable act yesterday and he was thinking of how to repay him.

 _I'll think about that later...I guess... ugh! What should I do for him?_  

~ 

Dwalin could handle Thorin's grumpiness. But this was going too far. Since Sunday afternoon, Thorin barely looked at him and hadn't spoken a word to him. It was starting to aggravate him and he was so close to lash out at him, but he kept reminding himself that Thorin didn't have a good day on Friday and yelling at him wasn't going to make things better, but it sure as hell wasn’t easy for Dwalin to be this patient. And his patience was starting to get at its limit.

"Hey. Thorin?" 

No response. 

"Thorin. You okay? You've been really quiet since yesterday." 

No response. Thorin kept looking ahead. Dwalin's patience had finally snapped. 

"Alright! I'm done with this silent treatment! Thorin! What the fuck is going on? Did I do something to make you mad?" 

"Well since you brought it up, yes you did!" 

"Enlighten me. What the fuck did I do wrong?" 

"Why were you with him?" 

"Who?" 

"You know who!" Dwalin was trying to remember about this 'who' Thorin was talking about. 

"No, I really don't. Mahal, Thorin! Tell me what I did wrong!" 

"WHY THE FUCK WERE YOU WITH BILBO? I SAW YOU TWO LEANING ON EACH OTHER WHILE YOU WERE LEAVING THE FIELD!" 

"HE FUCKING FELL OFF THE BLEACHERS AND I WALKED HIM BACK TO HIS DORM! FUCK THORIN WHY DO YOU CARE?!" 

"BECAUSE I LIKE HIM MAZAM ME!" 

They both were breathing harshly from their shouting and the silence was thick that a knife could cut through it.

Dwalin blinked a few times trying to comprehend on what he just heard. 

"Oh." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul words:
> 
> Mazam me- You brute
> 
> PS: If you are dealing with weight issues, please know that you are beautiful! Fuck the media that says skinny or fit is the true meaning of beauty. NO! YOU ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL! Whether you have cellulite in places that you wish that didn't exist to that tummy that you wish that you could slice off with scissors to your thighs that you wish were a gap. It's easier said than done, I know trust me cause people just think that if you think positive all the time that you would be cured of your insecurities (which is never the case), but know that you really are beautiful and that thinking positive takes time. So eat healthy and tell that person in the mirror that they are beautiful! <3 <3 <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! It has been a while again hasn't it? I'm so sorry! Everything in college has been so hectic since this semester is coming to an end meaning more papers and finals to finish up. I'm not really happy with this chapter though. I don't know, I feel like something is missing but I just had to put a chapter up for you guys because you all have waited so patiently for me (which I deeply thank you).
> 
> Again! I want to thank all of you for reading this fanfic of mine and I'm so happy to see people comment on it and sending me kudos, I mean wow 224? That's incredible! Thank you, thank you, thank you!
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

Thorin's dorm room was quiet. His classes were finished and rugby practice was going to start soon. He knew that he should be getting ready to train for rugby, but he didn't have the energy to get ready. The whole spat between him and Dwalin still weighed heavily on his mind. After shouting at Dwalin telling him that he's liked Bilbo for a long time had Thorin feeling awkward for some reason. It was almost as if a private secret of his had been revealed so suddenly. His secret felt like a dead frog on a cold silver tray where students dissected every scrap of slimy evidence. He knew that Dwalin didn't judge him because of his sexuality. Dwalin always knew that Thorin liked boys and had a fling every now and then. For fucks sake, he knew Dwalin was bisexual so he understood what Thorin was going through, but he didn't understand the inkling awkward feeling that he was getting from out of nowhere. He hadn't had a shouting match like that since him and Dwalin were kids. Throughout the entire weekend, he was wondering what he did to upset Bilbo. He was trying to find out how to make everything better between him and Bilbo, but he couldn't think of anything so instead he did what he did best...sulk.  

Dwalin came inside and saw Thorin's blue uniform still neatly folded on his chair. He saw Thorin under his covers with his long hair sticking out.

 _Mahal, what a fucking drama queen._  

"Thorin. C'mon stop your sulking and get out of bed or we're going to be late for rugby practice." 

Thorin sighed and slowly got up. Rubbing the crust off his eyes; he looked at his uniform dully. He wasn't sure if he wanted to go to rugby practice, he still felt like shit if he were to be honest with himself but he knew that if he didn't go he would start slacking and he did want to impress Coach Bard. He wanted to prove to not only to his coach but to himself that he could be a good captain for the team and maybe still have a shot on impressing Bilbo. He grabbed his uniform and slowly put it on. He tied up his hair and looked at himself in the mirror. He looked like a hot mess. His eyes were glassy and dull and there were dark circles under his eyes like he hadn't slept for days. He headed out with Dwalin who was patiently waiting for him. Dwalin knew that Thorin was still feeling hurt about everything and he got the feeling that Thorin felt a bit violated after he practically shouted, out of jealousy and not on purpose, to the entire world that he liked nerdy Bilbo Baggins. Dwalin knew that his best friend needed patience and for someone to listen to him so he didn’t say anything about the matter unless Thorin was ready for them to talk about it.  

~ 

The sun was high and the weather was getting cooler, but the rugby team in the field felt like it was summer from all the running and suicides that Coach Bard had them doing. Coach Bard was frustrated. He thought that Thorin was doing so well but lately throughout practice he'd been causing fouls all day. Bard blew his whistle and told everyone to do three more sets of suicides. Everyone groaned and some cursed under their breath shooting glares at their coach, but mostly towards Thorin. They knew that Thorin was the cause of their muscles screaming for relief. But he could care less about his team now. He felt tired; his lungs felt like they couldn't get enough air to pump more blood in his heart and his legs were starting to shake. The more he messed up, the more suicides that they had to do. He knew that if he didn’t start focusing, his coach won't think of him as being a leader. He won't be team captain and the whole team would see him as weak. As soon as the team was done with suicides Coach Bard gave them a five-minute break.  

"Thorin! May I speak with you please?" Coach Bard asked.

Thorin sighs. _Fuck, this isn't going to be good._  

"Yes?" 

"Thorin. I'm sure you've been noticing that you're not doing well. You obstruct your opponents, you tackled the player while they're still in the air and you're tackling too early...that's a lot of mistakes from someone who's been doing well so far." 

Thorin wasn't sure what to tell his coach. He doesn't want to make any excuses cause what good was a leader who made so many damn excuses?  

"Is there anything weighing on your mind?" 

"No. I’m sorry coach. I'll stop making mistakes." 

Bard looked at Thorin hard. He knew that he was lying, but Thorin's poker face made it hard to determine whether his instinct was right. Thorin was an amazing player, maybe one day in his prime he can play with professionals, but as of now it looked as though Thorin was going through something and he wasn’t focused. All Coach Bard could do was dismiss him.  

"Alright. Let's start again!" Coach shouted. He blew his whistle and the team got in formation once again. 

~ 

The following day arrived and surprisingly Thorin finished his research paper within a day and it was all thanks to Bilbo's help that day. He looked at the notebook that Bilbo lent him, it looked old and was very well used. It had puppy eared pages and tea stains crusted at the edges. There were a few doodles of oak trees and acorns and a house on a hill that had a green door with a brass door knob in the middle. Small footnotes from his previous classes were scribbled in on random spots of the pages. Everything in this notebook was so aesthetically beautiful and represented Bilbo well. Thorin smiled a bit from looking at Bilbo's cute doodles and his handwriting which was too perfectly neat or too curvy to make out what Bilbo was writing; probably from having an idea and writing it as fast as he could.  

Thorin looked at his phone and wondered if he should really text Bilbo and ask what was wrong and if he did anything to upset him; which led Thorin to the hurtful path on that day where Bilbo suddenly walked out on him clearly looking upset. But there was still something else that kept bothering Thorin and he still, for some reason, couldn’t help but to feel upset whenever he saw Dwalin. He picked up his phone but decided to put it back down. He thought that by shouting out to Dwalin his secret crush was the big deal, but the more Thorin thought about it the more he began to realize that yelling at him and basically calling him a brute wasn't his biggest issue. It was the fact that Dwalin was there to help Bilbo and comfort him and it made Thorin upset because he wasn't the one that was there to help him. 

Sooner or later Bilbo had get his notebook back, but he was still unsure if he should see Bilbo. It was only a few days and what if Bilbo didn’t want to see him? He ran his hands through his hair and sighed deeply.

 _Tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day. I'll decide on what to do then._  

~ 

It was evening and Dwalin was sitting in his usual spot in the library with his textbook open, but he wasn’t reading it. He’d been staring at the same page for the past 20 minutes. He couldn't find his cute red haired crush anywhere. He checked his phone to see what time it was.

_That’s weird. He should be here by now._

Okay, yeah it was a bit creepy, even for him, to know what time his crush was usually in the library. But that wasn’t the point, okay. He just wanted to find him so he could talk to him about Thorin and his friend, yeah that seemed like a plausible reason. Not the other reason to stare at him and fantasize about him. Thorin was being such a drama queen that it was becoming a bit painful to watch. All Thorin ever did was his homework, eat, sleep and train for rugby...and it's only been two days. He wasn’t sure if he could handle Thorin's sulking any longer. He needed to come up with a plan and quick if he wanted his best friend to stop acting like this. 

"H-Hi," someone said behind him. Dwalin made a startled noise and clutched his chest.  

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." Ori appeased.  

Dwalin smiled at him. Damn, his crush is too damn cute and all he wanted to do now to him was spoil him rotten or bend him over the table and ravish him, whichever came first. "You didn't scare me, just startled me is all. I was actually looking for you." 

Ori eyes widened and his cheeks turned rosy at the sight of his crush's beautiful toothy smile. "Y-You were?" 

"Yeah listen. My best friend is down in the dumps for some reason and I think it has something to do with your roommate." 

"Bilbo? Wait...was your best friend the one who that Bilbo tutored?"  

"Most likely. Look, he's acting like a fucking drama queen and I think by getting them together so they can talk it out will help." Dwalin rubbed the back of his beck. He was nervous around him which was foreign to him. He’d always been a confident around everyone, but something about this man made his stomach squeamish.

"Well at least it's a plan. So, what do we tell them?" 

"Thorin has a notebook that belongs to Bilbo that could be a good reason to meet." 

"It's a good start. Where should they meet?" 

"In my dorm. Thorin is a stubborn fool and I know for a fact that he's not going to leave unless I take him out of the room myself." 

"I'll text Bilbo and see if he's awake," Ori texted a quick text to him. He looked at Dwalin expectantly and gave a small smile, "we'll just have to wait and see I guess. Is this seat taken?" Ori gestured towards the empty chair that's right beside Dwalin.  

"Help yourself." Dwalin smirked.

_Confidence is fucking key Dwalin. Confidence is key. Confidence is key._

Ori sat down and placed his messenger bag on the table. He noticed a textbook and a few index cards scattered around the table. 

"What are you studying?" 

"Ah nothing too important. You know just basic courses that they make everyone take." They look at each other and chuckle under their breath.  Everything was suddenly becoming too warm inside the library.  

_Confidence. Confidence. Confidence!_

"I don't know if it's any of my business but I was wondering if Bilbo was doing okay. He looked pretty bad last time I saw him." 

Ori looked away. He thought that he shouldn't talk about it too much about Bilbo's extreme diet. It was personal and it wasn't his issue to tell. 

"He's just troubled is all. I think he's going to be okay now though."  

 _Hopefully._  

"You know. I don't know your name," Dwalin begans, "my name is Dwalin. Yours?" He stuck his hand out. 

"Ori. My name is Ori," he said taking his hand and shook it with a warm flush on his cheeks. 

 _Ah. His hand is so big and warm._  

_His hand is so small and soft._

~ 

Bilbo woke up from his phone going off. He rubbed his face and picked up his glasses. He slept through most of the day again. His head felt heavy like lead and his tongue felt dry and big. He unlocked his phone and saw a few messages from Ori. 

 _Hey! I'm heading to the library. Message me if you want anything :) -O_  

 _Bilbo. Are you awake? -O_  

 _Let me know when you wake up. I need to talk to you. -O_  

Oh, well that sounded kind of urgent. Instead of texting Ori he called him. The phone rang for a few seconds until he heard Ori pick up. 

"Hey. What did you need to talk about?" 

"Are you feeling a bit better?" 

"Yeah a bit. Is everything alright?" 

"Yeah! Everything's fine. My friend Dwalin tells me that he has your notebook in his dorm room. I would go, but I'm busy studying and Dwalin is somewhere with his friends." 

"Well I can always get it tomorrow if-" 

"No! You have to get it today!" Okay. Something was definitely up. Bilbo knew that something was going on but wasn't sure if he should pry on it too much, no matter how much his nosy Took side desperately wanted to know what Ori was up to. 

"Why do I have to get it today?" 

"Uuuhmm because-" 

"Ori." There was a slight muffle in the background and a few whispers that Bilbo couldn't pick up on.  

"Ori! Why do I have to get my notebook now?" 

"Because there were some notes that you showed me last time and I really need to see them." 

Bilbo wasn't buying it, but he couldn't help but think that maybe Ori did need his notebook for his class. He wasn’t going to risk Ori's grade; it'd weigh too heavily on his mind. 

"Alright. How am I supposed to go inside his dorm room without his key?" 

"He left his dorm room unlocked."

 _Well that doesn't seem safe at all._  

"Alright give me an hour-" 

"No! You have to go now!" Ori persisted. 

"Why the hell do I have to go now?" 

"Uh..." 

Click.  

"Did...DID YOU JUST HANG UP ON ME?!" Bilbo shouted into the receiver. He groaned loudly and rolled out of bed. He looked through his closet and thought that it didn’t matter what he looked like. He was tempted to go in his pajamas, but decided against it. He put on his brown pants and wore his grey t-shirt. He glanced himself at the mirror and saw his outfit. His shirt was a bit tight and did show off his imperfect figure; out of self-consciousness he grabbed his green cardigan from his closet and slipped it on. He was out the door in a few minutes still grumbling and a bit peeved that Ori just hung up on him for no reason. 

~ 

"Dwalin. Why do I have to stay in my dorm?" 

"Because I have to go somewhere with my new friend and I borrowed something from another friend and he's coming here to get it so you'll just have to give it to him." 

Thorin knew that Dwalin was good at lying, but he wasn’t good enough. 

"You're lying." 

"Am not!"  

Thorin gave him a look of disbelief. He scoffed and thought it was best to let it slide this one times cause what was the point really. He wasn't going out anywhere. He'd been in his dorm most of the day wondering if he should text Bilbo or not. Besides Dwalin was leaving and he'd been hovering him for a few hours and he could use the alone time, plus he was still a bit upset at Dwalin for being Bilbo's savior and not him. He knew that it was irrational to feel that way towards his best friend, but he couldn’t really help it. 

"Alright fine. I'll buy your lies. Just lock the door when you leave." 

"Yeah sure."

 _Psh, not. Fucking asshole._  

Thorin tapped his fingers on the silk screen that was his phone. _For fucks sake. It's just sending a text message to him, asking him if he's okay and hoping that I didn't offend him...but why is it so hard? It shouldn't be this hard. Fuck Thorin! Don't be such a pussy!_  

He heard the door open with a soft thud. _Dammit Dwalin! I told him to lock the door before he left._ If it was going to be some random burglar, he was going to be ready for him. Thorin was undeniably ready to punch someone in the face if anyone was going to try and attack him. He waited for his intruder to come in. His fists were tight and ready to strike when a soft whisper faltered his adrenaline to fight. 

~ 

The room was dark like inside of a cold mountain. 

"Hello?" Bilbo whispered. 

"Bilbo?" A voice deep and husky came through the darkness. Thorin emerged from the side of his door. He was clad in his black sweats and dark blue gym tank. _Oh, sweet Yavanna have mercy. Look at those biceps...pretty sure he can easily choke me...wait what? FUCK! I really need to stop thinking like this!_

"What are you doing here?" Thorin asked.  

"Me? What are you doing here?" 

"I live here." Bilbo and Thorin looked at each other and they both started to realize that they had been parent trapped by their friends. 

"I can't see anything. Do you mind turning on a light?" Thorin mumbled an apology and told him how he and Dwalin were so used to the dark that they barely used the lights when it was nighttime. Thorin turned on a small lamp and a yellow hue illuminated the room. Thorin saw what Bilbo was wearing and he had to control his groan. His shirt was tight and he could see his plush tummy. _Oh, Mahal have mercy on me! Why’d you have to do this to me?! Are you testing me right now? Because if you are, I’m losing so bad right now._

Bilbo was still feeling anxious and he knew that he should apologize but he didn’t even know where to start. Thorin cleared his throat, interrupting Bilbo's train of thought.  

"So, I'm assuming you're here for your notebook." 

"Oh yes. Apparently, Ori needs it for his classes...but I think he was just bluffing." Thorin breathed a laugh and looked up at Bilbo and saw his face. Something was wrong. Bilbo had already slept throughout most of the day, but there were remnants of sleep loss when he was on his extreme diet on the weekend and it still showed. Thorin closed the gap between them and lifted Bilbo's face so he could see him more clearly. Thorin didn’t realize what he was doing, it was out of pure instinct to see what was wrong with Bilbo. His brows were furrowed with concern the more he looked at Bilbo's face.  

"Are you unwell?" 

Bilbo hitched a breath. _He's concerned? About me?_   

"Tell me. Have you been feeling ill?" 

"A bit, but...right now that doesn't matter." 

"Doesn't matter? It matters to me." Thorin's eyes widened from his confession; he looked away from Bilbo's face still trying to process that he blurted out without thinking. He took his hand away from Bilbo and scolded himself for saying things that weren’t meant to be said yet. 

Bilbo's face flushed from the bottom of his neck to the tips of his ears. Blood rushed through his ear deafening any noise throughout the dorm. He was so certain that Thorin could hear his heart beating out of his chest. Nobody had ever been concerned of him except for his parents. No person had ever made Bilbo feel so loved in all his life, even if it was as simple asking if he was okay.  

"T-That's probably the nicest things anyone has ever said to me," Bilbo whispered, "Thorin apparently, the main reason was to grab my notebook, but I really wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for the way I acted to you that day when I was tutoring you. You didn't do anything to offend me. It was me to be honest. I can't tell you now because it's something that I don't like talking about, but please know that it wasn't you...it was me and I'm so sorry if I've offended you in any way." He was so close to tearing up but he wasn't going to cry. He was so tired of crying and he wasn't going to show any weakness to Thorin Durin.  

Thorin was dumbfounded. Here he was wondering for most of the day whether he should text Bilbo and apologize to him but as it turned out that Bilbo was apologizing and for some reason Thorin felt immensely better.  

"You don't have to apologize. I'm just happy that I didn't offend you." He chuckled quietly and rubbed the back of his neck which he noticed that it was strangely warm in his usually cold dorm. The awkward tension had cleared up. Everything was lighter than a feather and Thorin can breathe again. "Did you want your notebook back?" 

"Oh, unless you're done with it. If you're not then I can wait-" 

"I'm done with it. I turned in my research paper recently and I really couldn't have done it without your help," Thorin smiled at him and resisted the urge to smooch his blushing face, "I would very much like if we can continue our tutoring lessons together." 

"Really?" 

"Yeah really."  

They both agreed that they were going to continue tutoring each other; Bilbo teaching Thorin more about grammar and how to write stronger papers while Thorin will continue teaching Bilbo Khuzdul. Thorin gave Bilbo's notebook back and showed him out to the door. 

"Bilbo?" 

"Yes?" He looked at him with wide expectant eyes. 

"Are you doing anything this weekend?" _Mahal Thorin! Stay calm. Damn, can my heart get any louder?_  

Bilbo shyly smiled, "I'm free this weekend. How about Saturday at 7:30?" 

"Deal."

"Gamut nanun Thorin." Bilbo softly said and dashed back to his dorm. Thorin cracks a toothy smile and felt his face burning.  

_Damn he's so cute._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to let everything end in this chapter a bit more happily because I can't stand angst...and I can't stand writing it because I don't have a lot of practice on it. 
> 
> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words:
> 
> 1) Gamut nanun: Good night.
> 
> PS: Okay so I was scrolling through my otp tag on my tumblr and I stumbled upon this gorgeous fanart from hackedmotionsensors of Bilbo and Thorin and I completely forgot that I wanted someone to write a fanfic of this AU and look at me! I'm actually doing it! I subconsciously wrote a fanfic based on this art lol! How uncanny is that? :'D Bilbo even has his eyeglasses and ugh he's just so cute! 
> 
> http://bitchykanon.tumblr.com/post/127807668302/hackedmotionsensors-rugby-au-that-is-a


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! It has been a long time and for that I am truly sorry. I almost dropped this fic because I thought I wasn't good enough for anyone and I did what every writer should not do which is compare myself to other writers. But I thought to myself, I can't just abandon this fic because not only have readers left me wonderful and meaningful comments, but I honestly wouldn't feel good about myself. So like always, please be ever so patient with me because the chapters will be updated slowly but I am not going to leave this fic. 
> 
> I have posted a fic about Thorin and Bilbo and it's called Spring which is probably the longest fic I've ever written and I hope you guys go and read it cause it would mean a lot to me and would help me if there is any way I can improve my writing.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

The day that Bilbo agreed to go hangout with Thorin was something that he couldn't stop thinking about throughout the entire rest of the week. Thorin couldn't stop staring at Bilbo on the days he tutored him wondering how on earth Bilbo agreed to hang out with him on Saturday. Bilbo looked a lot better too. His eyes weren't sunken in and the bruises under his eyes from the lack of sleep disappeared. He had the color back on his cheeks and laughed much more easily now. When he was sitting down listening to Bilbo go on and on about metaphors and whatever chapter he was supposed to be reading that Professor Thranduil assigned him all went from one ear and out the other. Hearing his soft laughs and gazing into his easy smiles threw Thorin over the loop. He began to realize that all this tension that had happened could've been prevented if he only he had just talked with Bilbo in the first place. He laughed to himself at his own foolishness.  

~ 

Saturday was finally here! But one thing weighed heavily on Thorin's mind...what in the fucking hell were they going to be doing for the evening? Thorin groaned and rubbed his hands over his face. _I should've thought this out much more carefully!_

He opened his laptop and clicked on the browser. He searched relentlessly all over the web looking up what shops were open or what movies were out. Thorin almost grabbed his phone to text Dwalin. Maybe he could ask him for advice? He knew that his best friend was more experienced with social situations than he was. Despite Dwalin's gruff exterior he was effortless to talk to once you warmed him up. 

Ever since Thorin was a child he was always serious and quiet, his mother always told him that he took that serious demeanor after his father and grandfather. He was the worst when it came to social situations and even worse when he tried his best to give a compliment. He would never forget the day that his family had those horrendous family reunion parties when he lived in Erebor. All the girls were always after Thorin's brother Frerin because his charm was so endearing and bright while Thorin's grim personality managed to make any person run away. At the reunion, he tried his utmost best to compliment a girl in a pretty frilly dress, but Thorin to this day doesn't recall what he said, but let's just say it didn't turn out so well. And it ended up with an angry little girl in a beautiful frilly dress and a splash of Thorin's grandmother's best punch in his face.    
   
Thorin had always been a little too mature for his age and it was probably because he was the eldest out of his siblings and he had to take care of them most of the time, but that all changed when he joined the rugby team and realized how good he was in the sport. It gave him a confidence he didn't knew that he had and it made him extremely popular in school. At first, he didn't know how to handle all the attention since his siblings were the joy and walking sun shines that stole most of the crowd's attention while Thorin was a gloomy grumpy looking thunderstorm that would make anybody's day miserable with just one glance at him. It was overwhelming to the say the least, but he soon started to retrain himself that maybe, yes, it was okay to indulge with all the attention and he should enjoy it.  

Thorin chucked his phone. Asking Dwalin for advice was ridiculous! Thorin already had an idea of what lewd advice Dwalin would give him. He searched online of what they could both enjoy that won’t make them sit through awkward silences. The sound of the endless clicking and typing filled his dorm and Thorin was starting to lose all hope that he would never find whatever it was that he wanted. After frustrating searches, he settled for a movie and a café that Bilbo would enjoy a hot cuppa. He sent a message to Bilbo: 

 _Hey. So, if it's alright, I already found a place and a movie that we could see tonight. Is that okay? -T_  

Thorin's phone vibrated. _Well that was fast._ He couldn't help the smile that was spreading across his face. 

 _That sounds great! I love movies. Can't wait. :) -B_  

 _Cool. I'll pick you up at the front of the library, sound good? -T_  

 _Perfect. :) -B_  

~ 

Bilbo still couldn’t believe it. Did Thorin Durin really ask him to hang out with him? Since yesterday it was still sinking into his brain. He wondered and doubted and then he was happy, thinking that this day was going to be exciting and then he doubted again. It was almost his second nature to doubt himself. He'd been doubting himself for so long that it was still a huge surprise that Thorin asked him if he wanted to hang out with him. 

He thought about almost texting him if what he was doing was a big joke. He'd been pranked by other people before, making him believe that he was desirable and wanted. But it always turned out to be a cruel prank that would be embedded into his mind for life. Oh sure, he'd tried to talk with his family about it, but they honestly didn't help. They told him to get over it or try to like girls for a change. After attempting to be open he decided it was best to close up and the only opening he would ever do was opening a book. 

 _Do you really want to hang out with me? Are you sure? I wouldn't know what to talk about. Please don't talk about sports all the time, please don't look at the way I dressed tonight, please don't look at my body, yeah, I know it's hideous but could you please not?_ All those ugly thoughts ran through Bilbo's head throughout the rest of the day, but being with Thorin made him so disgustingly happy that he felt like it was too good to be true. Almost made him wonder if he was setting himself up for heartbreak. Was Thorin even gay? Bilbo tried to remember if Thorin had any high school sweetheart linked around his arms, but couldn't recall. He sure as hell did remember that all the girls were infatuated with him, but he didn’t remember Thorin ever having a girlfriend.  

So... was he gay? Most likely not. C'mon, a handsome guy like him? With his rugged sharp features, his thick muscled thighs from running, his long thick mane that Bilbo wanted to run his fingers through to see if it was course or silky smooth. Of course, he wouldn't be gay. Why would he be thinking of boys when he could be thinking of girls? Girls are softer, they smell nice and have funny giggles.  

There may have been a time that Bilbo thought he was bi. He loved women and he did try his very best to date some here and there but their mouths were too plump and tasted like fruity glosses and their bodies were too soft for his liking. He realized that he wanted someone strong and hard. That's when he realized that he preferred boys instead of girls. Boys just felt more right to Bilbo; they were stronger, their bodies firm, their voices husky and deep, how could he not stop looking at them? And Thorin was so strong and handsome and what kind of woman wouldn't fall head over heels for him?  

_Oh Yavanna! What am I going to wear tonight?_

It was like day one when he wondered what he was going to wear for the first time when he started tutoring Thorin. Bilbo began to wonder when all these feelings of having an impossible-crush-on-a-man-who's-most-likely-straight would cease to exist, but he started to tell himself that he should forget about what he was going to wear tonight and focus on what they would talk about for the rest of the evening. He really did hope that Thorin wouldn’t talk about sports all the time; he had a few dates that were horribly dull because they just would never shut the hell up about which football team was amazing or last season was so-and-so's best game ever. Ugh! Bilbo just wanted a normal conversation that didn't involve sports or how many people they've slept with-No! He wanted none of that! 

Bilbo read the clock and saw that it was still a little too early to head to the library; so, he went through his closet and tried his utmost best to pick an outfit that was decent looking and had enough cover up to hide his arms and stomach. Eventually he chose an outfit that was alright in his eyes and then came the dreaded decision...was he going to wear his contacts again and be bothered with them for the rest of the night? Or was he going to have to wear those ugly glasses of his. Bilbo chose the latter and wore his glasses instead of his contacts. He wanted to see Thorin's gorgeous face rather than having his eyes irritable all evening.  

Bilbo read the clock hanging off of his wall, 7:20. He took in a deep breath and gathered up whatever courage he had left and started to head towards the library. His heart was pounding as he walked to the library.  

 _Maybe I_ _should've stuck with the_ _extreme diet at least then my_ _stomach would've looked a bit flatter. Shit, maybe I should head back and wear my contacts, these frames are so ugly. Or...maybe I should just cancel? No! That would be so rude of me. Oh sweet Yavanna what am I going to do?_  

He saw Thorin sitting on the steps of the library and his heart stammered erratically. Thorin looked perfect and he wasn’t even dressed fancy, which Bilbo sent his thanks to whatever deity sparring him from thinking that he came underdressed.  

"Y-You look nice." Bilbo said. _Nice? NICE?_ Seriously? _Did I just say that?_ But Thorin didn't laugh, if Bilbo's eyeglasses were clear he probably saw his cheeks turning red, but his doubting nature kicked in and convinced himself that it was probably just the autumn chill. "So where are we headed?" 

"To the movies and I found a café that you would probably like since I know you love your tea." 

Bilbo face flushed. That was the sweetest thing that anyone had done for him...remembering that he loves his tea.  

Since everything in the city was so close to each other, there wasn't a need for a car unless anyone was planning on taking a road trip to the countryside or to the airport. But the walk to the bus stop was awkward and Bilbo didn’t know what to say to ease this silence. He fiddled with his bus ticket inside his pocket to ease his nervousness, but it wasn't helping at all. His doubts flickered on and off in his head and still wondered why on earth Thorin asked him to hang out with him. 

Bilbo decided to look at the way Thorin was dressed for tonight, hoping that it would calm him down. Thorin wore dark blue tight jeans with a light brown belt with a shiny gold buckle. His crisp black buttoned down shirt had been ironed to perfection and of course, like every hot man in Bilbo’s perspective, his sleeves were rolled up above his elbows. But overall he wasn’t dressed fancy, he just looked nice. He sent his thanks to the heavens again for not feeling so underdressed. But the hope of feeling calm by looking at his long time crush just made his uneasiness worse. Thorin and Bilbo approached the bus stop when Bilbo paused and mustered up whatever bravery he had left in him to say, 

"Thorin?"  

Thorin turned around eyebrows raised in question. "Yeah?" 

"Thanks for inviting me to hang out with you tonight. I haven't been feeling like myself lately, but uhm...uh, I just wanted to say thanks." Bilbo said. _Oh no! You messed up! You should've kept your mouth shut! Why didn't you just keep your mouth-_  

Bilbo's train of thought completely vanished when he saw Thorin's broad smile. 

"No problem. I'm glad that you wanted to hang out with me," Thorin said. Bilbo was about to say something, but wasn't sure what, but it looked like someone was watching over him because he didn't have to say anything because the bus hissed to a stop. "Oh, the bus is here. C'mon we don't want to miss the movie." 

For a fleeting moment, all of Bilbo's doubts flew out the window and hoped that maybe, yes, this was going to be a great night and for once he should leave his bloody insecurities in his cold dorm room and embrace the fact that Thorin genuinely enjoyed his company.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this chapter was short, but I couldn't leave you guys hanging for god knows how long! Not to worry though, we'll see how our foolish oblivious fools' date...I mean hangout goes in the next chapter. :)
> 
> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I'm not dead (surprisingly). A lot has happened to me in the past two months. My depression is still lingering about, but I'm happy to announce that it's not as bad as it used to be! :D I'm learning to take things one step at a time and teaching myself that school or writing does not have an expiration date. I finally have a job! WOO! And I'm taking two online classes. BOO! D: 
> 
> I'm still so sorry that I haven't updated in months and you all have been (yet again) ever so patient with me. All I can say is thank you for sticking with this story and showing me all your love and kindness in the comments. They truly do make me happy and fuel the fire within me to continue with this fic and writing in general.
> 
> I'm also extremely happy to see that this fic has reached 300 kudos! WHAT? SERIOUSLY? THAT'S AMAZING! I honestly thought that this fic was going to get 20 kudos cause of my simple style of writing (which I'm still trying to improve on) and even if it did it still would've made me happy that people liked it and read it. 
> 
> So you have all waited a very long time for this chapter so you finally get to know what's going to happen where you left off with our love sicken fools (who seriously just need to tell each other that they love one another so they can cuddle and snog all day long)
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

The ride to the movie theater wasn’t as bad as Bilbo thought it would be. Bilbo had this inkling feeling that Thorin could sense his uneasiness on wondering what to talk about, so Thorin did most of the talking. And to Bilbo’s utmost relief it was easy and felt natural talking to Thorin. He didn’t talk about sports all the time, he didn’t mention his past exes or lovers nor was he teasing Bilbo about his ugly glasses and not so fashionable attire that he chose for the evening. Yes, this was going so much better than Bilbo thought! They talked of many things from Bilbo’s garden back home to reminiscing plays, old petty drama and pranks that their class had done in high school. Bilbo was falling faster and faster for Thorin Durin. The feeling was so intense that it made his heart quake with excitement and fear. And internally he was terrified; but he kept it to himself because he wasn’t going to be a fun sucker.

The bus arrived at its stop and it was only a few blocks away from the movie theater. The autumn season chilled the air and the inky black sky was sprinkled with twinkling stars. Bilbo noticed that Thorin looked up at the sky for some time and asked, “What are you looking at?”

“The sky.” Thorin said bluntly.

“Yes, I can see that, but why?”

“The stars here aren’t as bright. Back home the night would be illuminated by the stars and moon; they were almost as bright as Christmas lights... it was almost a magical feeling whenever I would gaze up at the sky back home.”

Ah. So, he was feeling a bit homesick, Bilbo can understand where he was coming from.

“Back home…” Bilbo began, “I loved to star gaze and my mum would tell me stories of when she was young and adventurous; and sometimes she would tell me stories of heroes and legends… I don’t know it just made me very happy and when I came here to study I would feel a bit of sadness that the stars don’t shine as brightly like they do back home. Over here…they almost seem too far away whereas back home they would shine so bright that you’d think that you can grab them if you jumped high enough.”

Thorin was looking at Bilbo keenly. Bilbo wasn’t used to people listening to him (aside from Ori) so he started to curl his already curly hair as a distraction from Thorin’s piercing blue eyes.

“Ah… haha. Sorry I tend to babble sometimes just ignore me.” Bilbo said with a face as red as an apple.

“Why would I want to ignore you? You’re the most intelligent and interesting person I’ve ever met.”

Bilbo’s fall became faster than ever. _Oh sweet heavens. Yavanna just smite me right now! I don’t think I can take this anymore!_ _The movie theater should be coming up close soon though, right? Does it always take this long to walk a few blocks?_

Bilbo didn’t know what to say so he started to fidget with his sweater and couldn’t help the goofy grin that was spreading across his face. _Ugh, you love sicken fool!_

Bright flashing neon pink and purple lights shone and illuminated the ticket stand. Bilbo was, yet again, thanking whatever deity was looking out for him because after what Thorin had just said to him, Bilbo didn’t know how to respond. Thorin was so direct and always got things straight to the point without beating around the bush that it made Bilbo at loss for words most of the time.

“U-U-Uhm. So, what movie are we going to watch?”

“That one.” Thorin pointed out the movie poster. The poster had a black background with a creepy red hue that created a shadowy figure.

“So, it’s a scary film then?”

“Sorry. Do you not like scary movies? We can see another one.”

“No! It’s alright. I don’t mind them at all.” Bilbo said with a smile, but inwardly he was freaking out. He’d always hated spooky ghost stories as a child and hated scary movies when he was old enough to watch them. Each scary movie would petrify him because each film would always start out with a normal family and everything was all happy and dandy that gave you a false sense of security, but then ghosts would come out of nowhere and possess people and make them do gruesome things to themselves or to their families. Or it would be some strange creepy neighbor that would be an evil serial killer. Ugh! It was just awful and Bilbo hated the lot of them. Ghosts, the things that go bump in the night, shadowy figures, blood and guts just about anything that made a horror movie ugly and scarring that it would terrify the living daylights out of poor Bilbo. _Well…I guess I won’t be sleeping for a few days then._

Thankfully, Thorin believed Bilbo’s little lie and dug through his pocket and grabbed his wallet to pay for the tickets. Bilbo insisted that he could pay his own ticket but Thorin was stubborn and ignored him and bought them anyways. They made their way inside the theater and the smell of salty butter filled his nostrils making him somewhat hungry. He spotted all the colorful treats: sour gummy worms, gummy bears, rainbow candies, chocolate bars. He wanted them all! But he didn’t want to look like a pig in front of Thorin. _Uugghh, but that popcorn and those nachos and gummy bears look so good right now!_ His tummy agreed loudly and he hoped that Thorin hadn’t heard his stomach growling.

“Do you want to buy some popcorn?”

“No!” Bilbo said quickly. Flash backs of nothing but drinking green tea and eating baby carrots and celery reflected through his mind. Dear sweet heavens he won’t get popcorn, despite his stomach disagreeing with him, he didn’t want to go through feeling like shit again. He always felt like shit whenever he would eat anyways. It was a vicious cycle of self-hatred; he would eat something and it would make him feel good but only for a moment then after he’d finished eating he’d would want to puke it back out for feeling like a disgusting pig.

“You sure? Your stomach says otherwise.” Thorin flashed a knowing smile. Bilbo’s ears and face turned bright red.

“No, no it’s fine. I’m positive that I’ll be fine.” _Great…now I’ll be scared to death and hungry just fucking brilliant! Ugh! You sucked the fun out of yourself yet again Bilbo…fucking bloody good job._

Thorin gave him a narrow gaze but didn’t make a comment on what Bilbo just said to him.

“Alright. Go find us some seats. I’m getting myself something.”

~

Buttery popcorn was popping inside the machines. Registers were ringing and soda machines were hissing the fizzy sodas into plastic cups. The entire concession stand smelled like butter and sweets. Thorin never usually buys anything from the concession because of their overpriced foods and treats. Seriously… why would you pay one candy bar that’s probably around six dollars when you could buy it at the dollar store? But he wasn’t thinking about prices anymore and quite honestly couldn’t give a shit about them now; what mattered most was that Bilbo wasn’t eating and Thorin wasn’t going to stand for it.

Thorin knew that something was up with Bilbo when it came down to food. His beloved crush may have a quick wit and excellent comebacks but he still needed to work on his facial expressions when it comes down to lying about something personal. He hoped that Bilbo wasn’t starving himself because he thought himself fat. Thorin didn’t mind his soft stomach or soft arms. In fact, he absolutely loved them. He wanted to cradle Bilbo and hold him close and call him ghivashel. He wanted to comfort him and tell him that he was beautiful with all his curves and unruly hair. But his instinct was telling him that Bilbo was hurting himself rather than helping himself and it worried Thorin deeply. As much as he wanted to press on and ask him what was going on, he shouldn’t. It wasn’t any of his business. He needed to be friends with him first before Bilbo could start telling him his deepest darkest secrets and issues.

The line shortened and Thorin already knew what to order.

~

Bilbo found seats and began to fiddle with his sweater again. Fidgeting was a nasty habit that he developed ever since he was a child. It was such a Baggins thing to do that he loathed it. But his mother always told him that it was better to be squirming around and twirling his hair than biting his nails; a horrid habit that his mother had developed over the years and had been thankful that Bilbo never picked up on it.

The theater began to fill up with more people and he was already dreading it. Wrappers were crumpling and the shine of the plastic wrappings twinkling in the dim lighting of the room. The never-ending smell of buttery popcorn wafted into his nostrils making his mouth water. He even saw a young woman with a bag of pastel blue cotton candy.

He was starting to regret that maybe he should’ve gotten something from the concession stand after all. He wouldn’t want to ruin Thorin’s movie by letting him hear his stomach growling throughout the entire movie. Bilbo stood up and hoped that he brought enough money to buy at least one small bag of gummy bears, but Thorin came to view with a huge bucket of popcorn on his right and an extra-large soda on his left. Too late now, he could always get it when a scary scene pops up.

Before Thorin took his seat, he reached something from his back pocket. Turns out that he bought more than Bilbo expected. The sound of crinkled plastic got Bilbo’s attention and Thorin gave the bag to Bilbo. A small packet of colorful gummy bears. He was about to say thank you to Thorin but his words got caught in his mouth. His usual icy piercing gaze became soft and warm like the ocean on a hot summer day. Oh. Maybe Thorin had a hunch about Bilbo’s love and hate relationship with food, but he didn’t dwell on the thought for long when the dim lights start fading.

~

Like most horror movies it started up with something normal; in this suspenseful horror film, it was a young girl who moved into an old town with her family and lived in a hew home, that just so happens to be where a disturbing demonic child used to live who was killed by his own equally demonic father. The movie was slow and easy giving everyone a moment to relax by thinking nothing scary was going to pop up anytime soon. Thorin caught in the corner of his eye that Bilbo was sipping some of the soda and reached for the popcorn. It eased Thorin’s mind tremendously by knowing that Bilbo wasn’t going to go hungry tonight.

He, purposely, forgot to bring an extra straw for Bilbo because his perverted mind whispered in the back of his head that using only one straw would be a great idea… it would be technically kissing, right? As Bilbo sipped the soda he couldn’t help but lick his own lips. His lips must be so soft and sweet from all the gummy bears that he’s eaten.

Just as the story was reaching its climax, a shadowy figure raced across the hallway where the young girl was treading. Thorin was not at all scared of horror films; he knew that all this crap was Hollywood magic so there was nothing to be afraid of. Sure, there were some scary movies that made him jump but it was all good fun and he usually laughed at the end. He heard a sharp gasp and saw Bilbo fidgeting like crazy. He looked at his fingers fiddling with a half-eaten gummy bear. Was Bilbo really scared of the movie? Thorin’s mind began racing. _I knew I should’ve insisted on watching another movie!_ As soon as he was beating himself up for not choosing a different movie, the demonic child’s face ashen and grey with tiny blue veins scattered across his face with bulbous black eyes came into view with a shriek making the audience and Bilbo shout. Bilbo unconsciously clung to Thorin’s arm hiding his face from the big screen. _On second thought…I’m glad that I didn’t insist!_

Thorin’s chest swelled with pride. He did not care if Bilbo was acting out unconsciously as long as he was using Thorin as a protector was all that mattered to him at the moment. He could smell Bilbo’s shampoo. Honeysuckle and coconut milk.

_Fuck me! He smells so good…I don’t think I’m gonna last._

The child became possessed from the evil spirit, her bones were cracking and her voice changed to something inhuman. She began flailing around the ground and slid across the floor. Rising to the wall while still convulsing. All the while, Bilbo hadn’t looked up once and still had his face buried in Thorin’s arm. He was obviously distressed and Thorin decided to make a bold move. He lifted his arm chair and wrapped his arm Bilbo. He whispered into Bilbo’s ear, “It’s okay. It’s just a movie. The effects are shitty and the parents are hilariously stupid, right? I mean why wouldn’t they believe their daughter when all this creepy fucked up shit is literally happening right in front of them?”

Bilbo giggled at Thorin’s comment but still didn’t look up to watch the movie. He didn’t mind at all, Bilbo didn’t have to watch the film, he could cuddle and snuggle all he wanted as long as Thorin was there to wrap his arms around him and to smell his alluring warm scent. Yeah, Thorin was sending a thanks to Mahal right now for not being too hard on himself to watch another movie.

~

The movie was finally over to Bilbo’s relief. During the film, Thorin kept making quiet comments and jokes for Bilbo making the movie not too scary (even though Bilbo was extremely terrified). He realized that he practically was laying his head on Thorin’s chest. This was supposed to be hangout not a bloody date! And what did Bilbo do? He behaved like he was on a fucking date! _Ugh! You stupid idiot! He probably thinks you’re a wuss now, bloody brilliant! Way to go Bilbo, you made yourself look like a besotted idiot you’ve done it again congratulations!_

“C’mon. We should go to the café that we’ve been meaning to go to. I hope their tea is to your approval.” Thorin was getting up from his seat. His voice sounded like thunder and his body was warm like a furnace that Bilbo wished they could’ve stayed like that for a bit longer. Bilbo wanted to stay, but he was craving for his cuppa right about now.

They exit the movie theater and head down the street. The café wasn’t that far from the theater so they decided to walk instead of using the bus. Bilbo wanted to use the bus where it was safe and filled with bright lights inside. The alleyways were haunting and the streets had yellow hues from the light poles. Overall, the surroundings were unsettling and coming out of the movies from watching a horrific movie didn’t make it any better.

Subconsciously, Bilbo walked closer with Thorin. Their hands were so close that he could feel Thorin’s warmth radiating. _Maybe if I just graze his hand?_

“Were you really scared of the movie?”

Bilbo’s thoughts were halted from the sudden deep voice.

“Oh yeah, kind of. My goodness! I’m so sorry that I… you know.” Bilbo didn’t say anything else because there wasn’t much to be said. He knew what he did back there was not proper especially on a hangout that most certainly was not a date. He began to curl his hair quickly.

“Bilbo. You know that it’s okay, I didn’t mind.”

_What? Did I hear that correctly? He didn’t mind?_

“Y-Y-You didn’t?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Because- “

Bilbo stopped dead in his tracks. _Oh no. Please sweet heavens, please not him!_ Thorin’s brows furrowed in confusion on what made Bilbo stop. He looked in front and saw a tall shadowy figure striding towards them. Thorin was already mentally preparing himself for a fight. He wasn’t afraid to have a few bruises and cuts; all in his mind right now was to protect Bilbo at all cost and hopefully not get arrested if the brawl did cause a ruckus.

“Well, well, well. Hello Bilbo. Long time no see, little thief.” Bilbo didn’t say anything and refused to look at the tall looming man.

“Oh come now, don’t be shy why don’t you step into the light so I can have a better look at you.”

“Hello Smaug.” Bilbo mumbled. Yep, Bilbo would rather let the demonic child possess him right here and now because anything was better than facing his old bully and ex-boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops! Didn't mean to leave you all in a cliffhanger, but I did and I hope that I will get the next chapter updated a lot faster than two months.
> 
> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words:
> 
> ghivashel- treasure of all treasures


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Okay...so unfortunately it has been a while since I updated, but I'm so happy that I found time to write so I can present to you this new chapter. Note that the rating changed cause there's some little bit of smutty smut for ya'll. ;) I still have a lot to learn on how to write smut and porn in general, so I hope it's sexy and hot enough for you smut loving readers (cause I love my smut fanfics and love them super hot and steamy too). 
> 
> I hope you all are doing well and I'm so glad to see all your wonderful comments, they really do make my day and motivate me to keep on writing no matter how shitty I feel. And I see that this story has made it to 344 kudos! JUST WOW! I'M SO AMAZED HONESTLY! You all are so lovely. <3 I hope you enjoy this chapter.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239

_What in the actual fuck is going on?_

That one question was running through Thorin’s mind a thousand times a second. He looked up at the person known as Smaug then to Bilbo. Bilbo’s eyes were narrow with a fervent look of distrust. His body was hunched up and his head was down. His eyes were looking anywhere but at Smaug. He was twiddling his thumbs showing how uncomfortable he was by being in this man’s presence. Already, Thorin didn’t like him one bit. Why did he call Bilbo a thief? And why in the hell does Bilbo look so afraid of him? What did this man do to him?

“Hello Bilbo. It has been such a long time, hasn’t it?” Smaug said with a sly grin on his face.

Bilbo refused to look at Smaug. His eyes were glassy and focused in the yellow dim distance.

“C’mon Bilbo, look at me when I’m talking to you.”

 _Look at me when I’m talking to you? Fucking look at me when I’m talking to you? Seriously? What the fuck is this?_ That was when Thorin lost it. “He doesn’t have to look at you. You’re in our way. Move.”

Smaug quirked an eyebrow and looked at Thorin with scrutiny. “Ah. Your accent is very peculiar, Ereborean am I correct?”

“What of it?” Thorin growled, his accent growing heavy. His patience was wearing thin and dangled on the edge of the knife.

Smaug gave a short chuckle, “Nothing. So…Bilbo, little thief- “

“Stop calling him that.”

Smaug’s eyes flashed toward Thorin and glared at him for interrupting. “Does it look like I was talking to you?”

“I don’t give a fuck. You’re in our way and if you don’t move then I’ll do it for you.” Thorin promised with a bite.

“Well, well Bilbo; I absolutely adore your new guard dog. I didn’t think your type was rugged…is he your new boyfriend?”

Thorin’s heart skipped when the word _boyfriend_ was dropped. Thorin looked to Bilbo and saw that his face was red and his eyes were watery. Bilbo stopped twiddling with his fingers and instead started to bring his long sleeves down to cover his hands. Twisting the fabric so tight that his knuckles turned white. _No, no, no, no! This isn’t how this day was supposed to go!_ Thorin heard Bilbo’s breath hitch and he saw red. He grabbed Smaug by the collar. With his brute strength, he lifted him up and shoved him against the wall. Smaug was shocked with Thorin’s impulsive instinct to be on the offense immediately. Thorin was a hair’s breath away from Smaug’s face. Icy blue eyes looked straight into the glazed green eyes and since Thorin was so close to Smaug’s face he could see a splash of yellow surrounding his pupils.

Thorin barely put his entire weight on Smaug and he was trying to squirm his way out of his grasp. The more he wiggled out of Thorin’s iron grip, the more Thorin leaned his muscled weight on him, reminding Smaug of his unbending strength.

Smaug could see that no matter how many times that he tried to escape it was a defeated battle. He loosened up and raised his hands in defeat. But Thorin didn’t budge and still had him pinned against the wall. He wanted to punch this man’s face. He wanted his face to look purple and blue. He wanted his nose broken and gushing red. He wanted his lips split and swollen. He just wanted this man’s face that called Bilbo ugly names to be beaten and battered.

A small warm hand gently grasped Thorin’s shoulders waking him from his ruthless rage.

“Thorin. Let’s just go. He’s not worth it. He’s nothing but a snake.” Bilbo whispered venomously looking at Smaug for the first time. Thorin loosened his grip and leaned into Smaug’s ear whispering, “Abrâfu shaikmashâz.”

He released Smaug letting him fall with a loud thud. Thorin looked down on him with a callous look; somewhere in his gut he knew that this wasn’t going to be the last time he was going to see him. Smaug stood up and smoothed his shirt and straightened his collar. He gave Bilbo a once over and a slimy grin, “See you later Bilbo.”

~  
  
The walk to the café was overall awkward as hell. There was a heavy silent tension that followed them and none of them had the social skills to know how to break it and turn the situation a bit lighter. All Thorin wanted was to say sorry. _Mahal, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry you had to see that side of me. I’m sorry you had to see my violent side. Mahal, please don’t be afraid of me._

“Thank you.” Bilbo said. He said it so quietly that Thorin almost missed it.

“Wh-What?”

Bilbo stopped and looked straight at Thorin’s blue eyes that were once icy but now soft like a calm ocean.

“Thank you. Nobody has ever stood up for me…ever.” Bilbo looked up at him with hooded eyes; eyelashes casted down and his eyes looked to be in a dreamy state almost euphoric. Thorin almost thought that his heart was going to burst out of his caged ribs. He felt his face lean closer to Bilbo’s but stopped himself. He told himself that he needed to slow down. This was supposed to be a hangout between friends, not a date. But Bilbo’s lips were such a lovely shade of pale pink and so plush; they looked so innocent but Thorin knew that those lips were probably nowhere near innocent. They practically screamed devilish sweet whispering promises to Thorin.

“I-It’s no problem.” Thorin said in a husky voice. Bilbo’s blood rushed to his face all the way to the tip of his ears. His pulse quickened and his heart fluttered around inside his ribs trying to break free from its cage.

~

The café was warm and smelled of strong herbs and coffee beans. The café was cozy with small dark brown round tables and vintage styled wooden chairs and high stools. Small rose gold lamps that clung unto the dark green wallpaper glow. Quirky framed pictures of men with flowered beards, local photography from around the town and even the university that Bilbo and Thorin go to, and watercolors and oil paintings of landscapes and fairies and nymphs were hung on the wall. The wooden floors creaked giving the café a rustic cozy charm that made Bilbo smile. It gave him some sort of happy nostalgia and deja vu. He can’t put his finger on it but the vibe that the café gave him was a good one and he felt like he’d felt this comfort before, but couldn’t remember when or where. Shiny glazed sweets, warm flaky buttery croissants stuffed with melty gooey cheese in the middle, colorful cake pops with rainbow sprinkles covered in the hard icing shell, and so many other delectable treats on display all for Bilbo. As much as Bilbo would love to stuff his face with sweets and savory he needed a cuppa to calm his nerves from seeing Smaug.

Bilbo went up to the register and asked for chamomile tea while Thorin asked for black coffee with no cream or sugar. Bilbo laughed to himself because of course Thorin would take his coffee black with nothing on it. The only thing he can think of is that black coffee is just so very Thorin. He insisted on paying since Thorin had already paid for their movie tickets, but it was mostly as a thank you for sticking up for him. Bilbo was having the sad realization that nobody had ever stuck up for him before aside from his parents and that alone was such a long time ago. _Wow…that’s oddly depressing,_ Bilbo thought. They both sat in a corner that had rose gold lamp shades accompanying them. The music that was playing throughout the café was Lana Del Rey “Shades of Cool” and it brought a calm melodic lullaby that eased the agonizing silent tension that they had while walking to the café.

Their hot beverages made it to their table and suddenly the ice was broken by Bilbo.

“Smaug was actually my bully when I was in middle school.”

Thorin didn’t say anything, coffee forgotten immediately when Bilbo spoke. His gaze was heavy as he searched Bilbo’s face waiting intently on what he was about to say next.

“I was…well as you can tell a pretty easy target in middle school. He was a smart guy; you know? He got excellent grades on all his exams and projects. He was and most likely still is a very rich boy; so he was definitely a spoiled prat who got everything he ever wanted. And that’s the thing that still never made sense to me. He had all these things; money, looks, the popularity amongst his peers, the high grades, and all good friends that you can imagine and he still picked on me. I guess I was his favorite considering that nobody, not even the teachers, wanted to mess with him.” Bilbo paused and took a sip of his cooling tea. The sweet flowery taste lingered in his mouth calms him. “There was nothing wrong with him, you know. From what I heard, he was raised in a good home with loving parents and relatives. He was never picked on and had no traumatizing event had ever happened to him…and that son of a bitch still picked on me. Dear Yavanna…what a fucking bastard.” Bilbo quietly laughed out of spite while he swirled his tea around his cup.

Bilbo kept to himself about Smaug being his ex-boyfriend. He didn’t tell him that he knew Smaug’s family or that he’d been into his house and knew what his room looked like. No. He kept all the intimate details to himself. He wasn’t ready to come out to Thorin; he wasn’t even sure if Thorin would be comfortable hanging around him if he told him that he was gay, especially if he figured out that he was gay for him.

Thorin didn’t know what to say. Why would anybody pick on Bilbo? He was probably the best thing that had ever happened on this earth, so why? He presumed that he would no doubt ever understand why Bilbo was such an easy target throughout his teenage years. Bilbo was the definition of sweet and massively charming person. His wit was so quick that it would put any sly fox to shame.  

“You know…some people don’t need to have a bad past to be cruel. Maybe he was just born to be a cruel person who has no feelings,” Thorin said looking intently at Bilbo’s eyes, “You of all people shouldn’t have been bullied, you’re too nice of a person to be treated so cruelly.” This time Thorin looked away. His face and neck crimsoned.

“Why are you so nice to me?” Bilbo randomly spurted out. His eyes widened the moment he spewed out his blunt comment. “I-I-I mean, I’m so glad that you are…it’s just that I never thought that you would be- “

“Nice?”

“Yeah…well nice to me.” He hoped that Thorin didn’t take this conversation to any offense or weirded him out or ruined the beginning of their friendship, but instead of being upset Thorin was chuckling.

“Well I can see why you would think that. This face of mine is kind of mean so not a lot of people approach me. I’m used to it.”

Bilbo couldn’t wrap his head on what he just heard. Did he just tell him that his face looks mean? No! That’s impossible! Could he not see that he was stunning! His voice alone sounded like thunder that made his body quiver, his carnal strength made his knees knock and made his groin warm and tingly, his eyes were the color of the ocean on a warm summer day; blue and clear and piercing; always looking as if he’d saw right through you and uncovered your soul.

“I…I don’t think so. I like your face.”

Bilbo and Thorin were silent. The comment settled heavily on each other. Yes, Bilbo was blushing throughout his entire body (if that was even possible). His heart probably dropped to the floor. He wanted the entire world to melt away and swallow him up. Waves of nervousness and anxiousness came crashing into him like powerful ocean waves against the rocky shore.

“You like my face?” Thorin finally said breaking the silence with a smirk plastered on his face. Bilbo licked his dry lips and sipped his slightly cool tea.

“Uhm…yeah. I-I like your f-face,” he stuttered looking anywhere but at Thorin.

Thorin snickered, “Well if it’s any consolation to you, I like your face too.”

~  
  
The ride back to the university was silent and for once it wasn’t an awkward heavy tension, but a welcomed light hearted one. Despite the squabble with Smaug everything went fine. They both talked easily aside from some awkward silences, but they didn’t bother too much about it. They were both learning how to talk to one another and re-teaching themselves to be more social; to be more relaxed.

They were alone inside the bus and Thorin was so warm sitting next to Bilbo that he was tempted to cuddle up next to him and close his eyes and listen to the calming croon that was his beating heart. But he restrained himself and hoped that he’d hidden his goofy smile to himself.

~  
  
Bilbo slid his key inside the door and stepped inside his dorm. The room was dark and quiet. Ori was most likely asleep. He tried his best to close the creaky door as quiet as possible. The door clicked shut then his entire body quaked making his entire body slide down to the floor. He had never been this flustered for anybody before. He covered his mouth from his burst of giggles. He giggled like a love stricken fool and glided his curly hair from his face.

He undressed and did his daily night routine to go to bed. Once he was in bed he was wide awake. Recollecting on how Thorin grabbed Smaug and pinned him against the wall had been in the back of his mind all evening. He was so strong. He saw his firm muscles tighten and clench from lifting Smaug. His eyes were so wild, his voice rough, and his accent was deep and heavy when he got mad. It had Bilbo all wired up all night. He still didn’t know how he composed himself but he was thanking to Yavanna that he did.

All he could picture and wonder was Thorin lifting him up and pinning him against the wall and ravishing him. Blood flooded to his groin and oh no, he hadn’t had an erection like this in a long while. And it looked like it wasn’t going to go away if he didn’t do anything about it. Bilbo palmed his boner through his pajama bottom and pants. It felt too good; it had been so long since he jacked off. His hand slipped under his boxers and stroked his hard member. He squeezed the head feeling pre-cum already leaking through the tip. He used his pre-cum and slicked the rest of his cock with it. He used his other hand to touch himself everywhere; his thighs, his chest, his collarbone, his neck.

He thought of Thorin’s strength and how he could most likely lift him without any problem. He thought of the wild crazed look in his eyes to fight and replaced them with wild lust filled eyes only for him. He shoved his bottoms low around his ankles so he could spread his legs wider. He knows…he just knows that Thorin had a big cock and he wondered what it would feel like to be filled to the brim with it. His strokes were faster and slicker from more pre-cum just by thinking about Thorin’s cock.

The warm tight coil settled in his belly and it came so fast that he choked, “Ah! Shit! T-Thorin!”

Milky thick cum was leaking from his cock and ran down his hands. His legs were slightly twitching from the aftershock. For a moment, Bilbo just closed his eyes and enjoyed the afterglow, but then his legs were becoming cold and his prick was softening. He grabbed some tissues from his nightstand and wiped himself clean. He looked down on the used tissue and the wave of shame punched him in the face.

_Ah shit. I really do like him, don’t I?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words:
> 
> -Abrâfu shaikmashâz: (You) descendant of rats!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I hope your holidays went well and you all ate amazing food and spent time with good friends. 2016 is finally over cause holy shit what a shitty year it was! I hope 2017 will be good to all of you because you my fellow readers deserve it. And here I am, yet again, telling you guys (repetitively it seems), how sorry this chapter took. Honestly, with the holidays, my job over working me like a dog (even though I'm a part-timer and they pay me like one they still schedule me like a full-timer :) ), my depression acting up again due to personal circumstances with my friends, and now school?? Ugh! It'll become harder and harder to write. 
> 
> But not to worry I am not going to abandon this fic! I care too much about this story and I know that you guys do too (which makes me immensely happy by the way). So without further ado, I hope you enjoy Chapter 11. I made this chapter just a smidgen longer than usual because who doesn't love nice long chapters?
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> PS: Have any of you guys seen Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them??? IT WAS AMAZING AND CREDENCE DESERVES SO MUCH LOVE AND HUGS!!!! 
> 
> PS: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR THE KUDOS! IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME YOU HAVE NO IDEA <3

Bilbo still felt ashamed of what he did last night, knowing that it was completely natural to have a wank when you’re turned on by someone you’re attracted. He knew that he shouldn’t be feeling this way, but his Took side couldn’t help himself. The want to feel so badly. The need to feel loved and secured was so overwhelming. All he wanted was to feel. He wanted his heart to be bursting with content and peace and love that’ll feel almost squishy. The feeling where your heart might bust out of its own clawed cage whenever you see the person you love and feel safe. He just wanted to feel. Feel. Feel! Feeling was such a strange word to Bilbo. Feeling meant that you were to become thinking irrationally and that was when the pain starts. Most of his life he’d been thinking more with his brain and had been feeling less and less with his heart. Bilbo remembered a time when his brain and heart were in complete balance with each other, but when he became older and started to feel a little bit more than think, that was when the hurting started to become painful and it had all started with Smaug. 

Bilbo rolled his eyes just by thinking of Smaug.    
   
_It has been a long time since I’ve seen him._    
   
There were many times where Bilbo would let his mind wander and think where his bullies were in life and somewhere deep down in the dark recesses of his mind, he wished that their lives were miserable and filled with despair and maybe even someone bigger and nastier was bullying them; but of course that would be terribly rude of Bilbo to say aloud, so he kept it to himself.  

~ 

It was a bright Sunday morning and usually Bilbo would wake up and have a wash then go back into his room and take diligent notes while reading for the next class, but he hadn’t had a lazy Sunday in a long while and decided that he should enjoy at least one day where he can do absolutely nothing. He opened his door and saw Ori's keys were missing. He brought out his phone and sent a quick text to Ori asking if he was in the cafeteria already. 

 _Hey. Are you in the cafeteria? -B_  

Bilbo started to change his clothes and most certainly ignored the full-length mirror, that his Aunt Lobeila gave to him that one time in a family reunion, and grabbed whatever freshly iron-pressed clean clothes that he had. But he looked at his own reflection anyways. His eyes narrowed as he looked at himself. Absolutely disgusting. He realized that his clothes shrunk a bit in the dryer and they were fitting snugly around his waist showing off his little muffin tops. Bilbo wondered if he should wear his coat over it so nobody should see his body, but the top that he was wearing was already warm enough against the cool crisp autumn air. As much as he hated his body, his stomach that he viewed ugly protested on needing food. 

He shoved his shoes on and laced them tightly. He headed off to the cafeteria and checked his phone to see if Ori ever replied, but so far he hadn't. 

 _Ori? Are you even at the cafeteria? Or are you at the library? -B_  

Bilbo made it to the cafeteria and looked around and texted Ori again wondering where he was. 

 _Hey. Where are you? I don't see you at the cafeteria...are you in the library? -B_  

 _Hello?! -B_  

The smell of greasy sizzling bacon and sausages wafted around the air. Eggs were being scrambled and hash browns were being seasoned. Every single morning was Bilbo's worst nightmare. Usually he skipped breakfast, but today his stomach was tired of not eating anything so he gave in. But instead of ordering what he really wanted, he settled for a small grapefruit and green tea. He looked around again to see if Ori ever made it to the cafeteria and to his small relief he was happy that he didn't show up. He knew that if Ori saw him drinking green tea and eating a small fruit he would've stopped him and made him eat something else. 

Bilbo walked toward to a table that was outside so he could feel the fresh air and enjoy his small breakfast.   
   
The grapefruit was sour and Bilbo was struggling to eat the rest of it. He downed the hot green tea hoping that it would fill him (and secretly hoping that its fat-burning magic would melt away his own). He threw his half-eaten grapefruit in the trash and shuffled for his phone again. Ori still didn’t respond to his messages and he was getting worried.  

He walked to the library to see if he could find any book that would kill a couple of hours. Whispers from students discussing projects and essays huddled together in corners. Before finding a book to rent, Bilbo looked through the groups and didn’t see his red-headed friend anywhere amongst them. He searched high and low for him. He peeked through the literary clubs inside the library and found no trace of him. He even asked the librarian who favored Ori.

“Hey Ms. Greene. Have you seen Ori anywhere today?”

“I haven’t, love. That’s strange…he’s usually here in the library, but I haven’t seen him all morning. If you do find him, tell him that the motorcycle magazine came in today.”

_Motorcycle magazine? What the hell?_

“Yeah sure, I’ll let him know.” Forgetting about finding a book for the day, Bilbo came out of the library and whipped out his phone. 

A few rings and Ori answered. 

"Hello?" 

"Sweet Yavanna Ori! Where the hell are you?" 

"Uuhhmm…it's a long story?" 

"Well it's a Sunday and I'm not doing anything so spill." 

"Wait what? You're not in your room studying? But it's a Sunday!" 

Ori was trying to stray away from the subject. 

"Yes. I know it's a Sunday but I thought one Sunday off wouldn't hurt my studies. And stop changing the subject and tell me where the bloody hell are you?" 

"Uhm. You promise you won't get mad?" 

"Why on earth would I get mad?" 

"Okay...so I met a guy..." 

 _Oh, sweet heavens...here it comes._  

"And we really hit off! He's so different Bilbo! He's not like the others I swear!" 

Bilbo rolled his eyes so far that they were probably all the way to the back of his head by now. Ori always had a string of bad luck when it came down to dating. Not that Bilbo should be one to talk from his years of being in an abusive relationship with Smaug; but the one thing that Bilbo was proud to say was that at least he got out of the relationship and never looked back. But for some reason Ori always had trouble with dating and with break ups. Every time he dated a new guy he always said how this one was different, how kind he was, how smart and talented he was, how much he truly cared about him, how the sex was always amazing, how the person he was seeing with promised that he would never cheat on him, etc. The list could go on forever but it always ended the same way, with Ori crying inside his room cradling a carton of butter pecan ice cream, feeling heart broken, and huddled up in his heavy quilted blanket that his brother gave to him.  

Ori always fell too hard and too fast. Ever since Bilbo broke up with Smaug he became much more aware when it came down to feelings hazing up logical thinking. And with that experience he always tried to give out some advice to Ori, but like always Ori would never listen to him until the last second when his relationship was falling to pieces. 

Bilbo sighed deeply and ran his hands over his tussled curls.  

"Okay. What's so different about him, hm? Oh wait! Let me guess. He's super kind and smart. Or how he's so proud of being out of the closet. Oh wait, I know! He understands you on a deeper level than anybody ever has before. Or he's dated shitty arseholes like you and he understands the same exact way that you do and-" 

"Stop it Bilbo, it's true! He is different!" Ori shouted back.

“Well this makes a lot of sense…I should’ve known.”

“What?”

“The motorcycle magazine that you’ve apparently waited for is at the library. Does your new man like motorcycles and you’re trying to get into it too?”

All Bilbo could do is just sigh. He already knew that there was no one in this world that would convince Ori or giving out his most crystal clear advice to him, he knew it would be going through one ear and out the other. 

"Okay, you know? Fine. I'm happy for you." Bilbo said in a monotonous voice.  

"You don't sound it." Ori said feeling hurt by Bilbo's tone. Okay, yeah Bilbo had to admit he was being harsh. He didn’t know why he was acting this way or why he was acting grumpy. _Ah shit, no wonder I'm fucking cranky. I haven't really eaten._  

"I'm sorry...it's just that I have a real hard time believing that this new guy of yours will be any different from the others. You always say the same thing and it always ends up with you and your blanket and ice cream and my shoulder that you'll be crying on. I just...I just don't want you to get hurt." 

"But Bilbo! You should trust me on this one though! He. Really. Is. Different." 

"How?" 

"Well... he's Thorin's best friend." 

What? 

What? 

WHAT? 

Bilbo went quiet. Did he hear him correctly? Thorin's best friend? Dwalin? The huge guy with all the tattoos and listened to heavy metal? 

"Ah. Got your attention, now don't I? Hmmm gee wonder why. Oh! I know why, it's cause maybe you have the biggest fattest crush on _**his**_ best friend and went on a date with him last night." 

"I-I-I-It wasn't a date! We were just hanging out as friends!" 

"Suuree. So, what do you say about my guy now huh?" 

 _Nothing,_ Bilbo wanted to say but he couldn't. I mean how could Thorin's best friend Dwalin be bad? He was friends with Thorin and Thorin was the handsomest, most honorable person that Bilbo had ever met; so there was no way in hell that Dwalin would be like the rest of the fuck boys that Ori had dealt in the past. 

Bilbo sighed in defeat, "Okay. You got me on that one. He is different." _Way different,_ Bilbo thought. He didn't think that Dwalin would even be Ori's type. Usually Ori preferred his men tall and lanky looking, almost to the point where they looked like nerds, but Dwalin was completely different, he was nothing but inked muscles and looking like the leader of a violent biker gang. 

"So, I can only assume that you were with him last night?"  

For the past fifteen minutes Ori began describing Dwalin and how perfect he was and how amazing their date went. Dwalin took him out to his favorite store and they went to walk out on the park. It was horrifically romantic, which made Bilbo just a bit envious wishing how his night with Thorin would’ve been like that. Ori continued blabbering about how his date and Bilbo couldn't really complain too much about his night out with Thorin. True, he didn’t want someone from his past to find him or Thorin, but he opened up to Thorin and he genuinely seemed interested in what he was talking about. And honestly that was more than Bilbo could ever ask for in a person, for just somebody to listen. 

"I was with him this morning. He'd usually go out to eat breakfast with Thorin, but he said that he was still sleeping." 

"Well we did come home a bit late." Bilbo said sheepishly.  

“Oh really? Came home late, did he?”

“Ori! I know what you’re thinking of and we didn’t do anything! I’m not like you.”

“Haha! Yeah suuree you didn’t. Hey! I can’t help myself if a guy offers me, you know? Who am I to say no to a good shag?”

Bilbo scoffed and the line went quiet for a splitting second until Ori asked, "Bilbo...did you eat today?" 

Bilbo's breath hitched quietly. _Should I tell him the truth? Should I say anything? Should I..._  

"Yeah I ate. Ate a good and hearty breakfast." Bilbo felt his guilt rising and he was a bit surprised at himself. Lying, faking, shielding himself with a mask was becoming so easy, a little too easy. His stomach still growling in protest from lack of food. 

"Okay good! That makes me feel better." 

 _Okay good! Glad it makes you feel better cause I just made myself feel like shit._    
   
"Are you still with Dwalin? Cause I'm heading back to the dorm." 

"Yeah, I'm still with him. I'll be back in the dorm shortly though so we can both study for tomorrow." 

"No, no! You don't have to come right away. Just take your time. Besides, one day of not studying won't kill us. We could both use the break."   
   
~   
   
Thorin's room was as a dark as a mountain. The blinds sealed shut so that the sun's rays couldn't even peek through his floors. He tossed and turned. Shut eyes moving hastily as he was still caught in his dreams. Thorin couldn't sleep well at all last night. He remembered listening to Bilbo talking about his past and he couldn't get it out of his head. He was too riled up to go out and find Smaug and beat the living shit out of him to teach him a few manners. 

Inside his dream, he found himself outside. The theater only a couple of blocks away. He saw Smaug in the dark distance and this time he didn’t hesitate to go after him. He lifted him up into the air with ease and smashed him against the wall. He shouted and screamed at Smaug; wailing him with hard punches and cracked his nose. Warm blood gushed out of Smaug's nose and his mouth started to dribble with drool. Thorin gave him a few hard kicks where he heard a sickening yet most satisfying crack in his ribs. Smaug was unconscious but Thorin still grabbed him and heaved him against the brick wall. 

"You're going to listen to me you witless worm. If I see you coming near here or Bilbo again, I'm going to make you wish that you were dead before you even see me." 

He dropped him to the ground; leaving him slumped and barely moving, only an occasional twitch to still show that he was still somewhat alive. He turned around saw that Bilbo was staring at him with his mouth open. Bilbo wasn't saying anything and it was making him nervous. Thorin had always known that violence was in his nature; punch first then ask questions later. It was the main reason why rugby became such an easy sport for him because the violence of the game was natural for him. 

"Bilbo. I-I'm so sorry you had to see that. I just-" 

Bilbo cut him off by smashing his lips with Thorin's. The kiss was filled with such passion that it left Thorin breathless. _Wait...what's happening? This is real. He's kissing me._ His adrenaline kicked up even more. Thorin reciprocated back impulsively; mirroring Bilbo's lips with his. He quickly wiped his tongue to taste Bilbo's sweet pink lips. Bilbo obligingly opened his mouth with a moan letting Thorin's tongue explore the caverns of his mouth. Thorin gently nudged them both into a small dark alleyway, allowing no one to see them. He didn’t want the world to see Bilbo this way, this was only for him. He angled Bilbo's head to bring their kiss deeper. They both became lost in their fevered kiss. Eventually they both had to reach for air, but it was only for a moment before they pushed their swollen lips back to each other. 

"Look at me." Thorin growled. Bilbo looked up at him with his eyes shining, pupils dilated, and panting shakily. Even through the dark, Thorin could see Bilbo's face flushing red. He looked so delectable almost good enough to eat; then a dark thought ran through Thorin's mind quickly. What's stopping him from eating him? Absolutely nothing.  

Thorin grabbed Bilbo's hair and pulled his head up revealing his neck. Thorin dragged his tongue to Bilbo's neck. He tasted so good, smelled so good that he couldn't help himself by rubbing his nose chasing the scent in his flesh. He sucked on his neck hard knowing that it would leave a purple bruise the next day. Bilbo hissed and grabbed Thorin's head pressing his face harder into his skin. At this point Thorin continued to suck, bite, lick just about anything to taste Bilbo's sweet skin. 

"Ah. S-S-So good Thorin. Keep doing that." Bilbo whispered breathlessly.  

 _Don't have to tell me twice._  

He left Bilbo's neck bruised and Bilbo didn’t seem to mind it at all. Their bodies were squished close to each other and they tried to get closer, both feeling that they couldn’t get close enough. Their pants were starting to become too tight and Thorin felt one of Bilbo's hands unzipping his zipper. Thorin looked up at him with a surprising look. _Okay yeah, there's no way in hell that Bilbo would do this...wouldn't he?_  

"What's the matter big boy? Is it okay if I do this?" Bilbo whispered in his ear. Thorin shuddered as he felt Bilbo grasping his hard-on.  

"Thorin." Bilbo whined, twisting Thorin's cock even harder. Thorin's hips push up loving the twist and friction that Bilbo was giving. He bravely palmed Bilbo's hard prick and Bilbo immediately pushed up. They both grinded on each other until they both start to become too frantic and desperate for more skin on skin contact. Thorin unzipped Bilbo's pants and shoved his bottoms and underwear down his thighs. Bilbo opened his legs a little and Thorin placed his heated hand over Bilbo's thighs loving the feel of how soft and plush it was.  

"Oh. Please, please, please. Touch me where I need it Thorin." Bilbo begged. Thorin licked his palm and began to stroke both of their flushed cocks together. The friction was just enough for both of them to start panting and whispering filthy promises to each other.  

Thorin pumped faster; both cocks red and leaking with beady white precome. Bilbo's breath hitched and his body started twitching. 

"You gonna come for me Bilbo," Thorin growled, "c'mon baby cum all over my hand."  

Bilbo was panting to the point where it sounded like he was hyperventilating. Bilbo was about to cover his mouth but Thorin grabbed his wrist and pinned it against the wall. 

"Don't do that ghivashel. I wanna hear you. I wanna hear you say my name." 

"Ah! Fuck! Thorin!" Bilbo shouted while pulling Thorin's hair.  

Thorin woke up drenched in cold sweat. He gasped for air and wildly looked around his room. His dream still fresh in his mind and his heart still pounding. He twisted off the bed with a hiss seeing that he was still rock hard from his dream. He managed to get out of his bed and glance around his dorm to see if Dwalin was still there. But there was no sign of him and come to think of it, when Thorin came home he didn't see Dwalin at all last night. His prick was starting throb, begging for release. He went back to his room and shoved his pajama pants down to his ankle and yanked his boner. It was going to be a bit dry and raw but at this point he didn’t care.  

His dream still vivid in his mind with Bilbo shouting out his name. He pumped his hard cock, twisting the crown making precome tear up from his slit. His body felt too warm and his cock was heated and swelling by the second of only thinking of how roughly and desperately Bilbo pulled his hair.  

 _Thorin. Please. Please Thorin, make me cum again and again._ Thorin's imagination ran wild and his cock spurted out thick white cum all over his hand. His breath stuttered and his body tremored from the afterglow. Swallowing thickly, he looked at his cock which still bounced trying to milk out everything its got. He felt light headed and that was when he thought he was definitely not going to last long if Bilbo can make him feel like this.  

"Well fuck me, I think I really do like him then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words:
> 
> ghivashel- treasure of all treasures
> 
> PS: I just wanted to let you all know that if you're feeling down or pretty much feel like life has no meaning at all whatsoever. Just stop. If it's even possible, I want you to stop thinking like that because you are so valid. You are the most talented, the most beautiful, most handsomest, most specialist person in the entire world. It may not seem like or look like it, but you are. During the holidays I almost lost my best friend cause her depression became too much. Even though (for some reason) she doesn't want to speak to me or talk to me anymore and even though it makes me feel hurt and a little mad, I'm not going to let it get to me too much. So, I just wanted to let anyone know who comes across this fanfic and sees this PS note; please talk to someone. It doesn't even have to be your best friend, it can literally be anybody! Just please talk to someone and know that you are special and that life is worth living for. <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! It would seem that I have (like always) leave you hanging for, yet again, another two months. :D Ahahaha...yeah sorry about that. School is going good so far (even though I have no idea if I passed my College Mathematics class or not :))) ) and life is going smoothly. And to bring wonderful news, I feel like my depression is going away. I've been taking a lot of time for myself and letting things go with the flow and thinking much more positively about myself.
> 
> I have got to say, I'm really impressed with myself on how long this chapter is. It's almost 3k longer than usual, but I'm sure you guys don't mind when a chapter is just a bit longer than the others, right? ;) 
> 
> I am so happy to see how much of you guys are reading this story about two love stricken fools that just need to get on with it and fucking kiss already, thank you all so much!
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> PS: WOW! OK THE KUDOS THOUGH! JUST WOW! THANK YOU??!! THANK YOU!! T ^ T

Although Bilbo said that he deserved a lazy Sunday, he still went ahead to his dorm and studied anyway. Eyes quickly scanning his textbooks and scribbling down whatever he deemed necessary on remembering for his future exams. He was a Baggins of course, and a Baggins always was and will be studious. Ori came home later in the evening and continued talking about how Dwalin may be the one for him, how funny he was and how much of a gentle sweetheart he really is; Bilbo was quiet and just smiled and nodded at the right time when reality was he was tuning Ori out. It was usually the same thing; how perfect the guy he was seeing was, how handsome, how much of gentleman, blah blah blah. Bilbo hated to admit, but sometimes Ori could get annoying when it came down to new guys that he would be dating, but of course Bilbo would never say it to Ori's face. 

~ 

Monday arrived quickly with the autumn chill settling in and reddish brown leaves falling all over the campus. Bilbo and Ori were almost late to class because of Ori's late night texting and Bilbo didn't want to leave Ori behind, but they somehow make it without Professor Thranduil making a fuss. They both sat down at their seats and everyone noticed that their usual cranky professor was in a light mood. 

Throughout class, he complimented on the student's attentiveness and how wonderful they had done on their essays...which had never fucking happened in the history of the campus. Professor Thranduil Greenleaf complimenting his student's essays? Impossible. Something had to be up. There had to be a catch, he probably was giving everyone a false sense of security of being an actual decent human being then he would give out the hardest exam that this campus had ever seen. Everyone was in silent shock, including Bilbo and Ori. Everyone wanted to know what put their professor in such a good mood and hoped with all their hearts can muster that it continued like this throughout the whole semester. 

"I wonder what’s got him in such a good mood?" Ori whispered. Bilbo shrugged and continued to write down his notes. Their professor handed them their work sheets and told them to work on it themselves or in a group (which yet again leaves everyone in awe because Professor Thranduil absolutely hated group projects, he said it was too noisy and a waste of time). Bilbo and Ori worked separately, knowing that they worked better alone. Bilbo looked up from his work sheet and noticed something on his professor's desk.  A small note with a single daisy lying on top of it. The note and the flower was discreetly hidden on his desk, but Bilbo was positioned where he could see Professor Thranduil's desk clearly. _Ah. So, he probably has an admirer? Or maybe it's from his wife?_  

Then the next oddest thing happened...their professor let them out early. Professor Thranduil was always a stickler on ending his classes promptly at the exact time they should end or sometimes extended his lecture for five more minutes (which for some reason always felt like ten minutes had gone by). Everybody didn't question it aloud and quite frankly didn't care if they got to leave early. Bilbo was already done with his worksheet and handed it to Professor Thranduil. He couldn't help but peer over the small note on top of his desk. The only few words that Bilbo could make out was: 

 _To: Thranduil_    
_From: B. Bowman_  

 _Bowman? Why does that sound familiar?_ Bilbo exited his class and found Ori with his cheek blushing and fingers quickly typing away on his cell.  

"So. I assume it's Dwalin who's texting you?" 

"Mhm."  

And that was that. Bilbo knew that there wasn’t going to be much of a conversation with Ori from here on out with his eyes glued to his phone. 

"So... I guess I'll head to the library then, okay?" 

"Mhm." 

Bilbo didn't fight to roll his eyes this time. The autumn air was seeping through Bilbo's brown cardigan and he wished that he brought his scarf with him. He entered the library and walked straight to the literary section. He could still recall the first time when Thorin tripped over him while he was sitting on the floor. The thought brought a smile on his face. Bilbo pulled out a few books that he'd been meaning to read and searched for a table, but like always the tables were all filled with students quietly typing away on their laptops or hair-pulling students with their strewn of papers on top of the table filled with chicken scratch notes cramming for their next exam. He found a quiet corner and made himself comfortable.  

Bilbo was halfway reading through _Pride and Prejudice_ when his phone sounded. The notification startled him; he was so enamored with the story that he realized his bum was numb. He opened his phone and saw a text from an unknown number. 

 _Hello._  

Bilbo usually deleted and blocked unknown numbers if they ever come across his phone, but something was nagging him to reply back. 

 _Hello? Who is this? I think you got the wrong number. -B_  

Ping. 

 _No... I got the right number little thief._  

Smaug. 

Bilbo's heart dropped to the pit of his stomach. His palms became clammy and his heart hammered so hard he was half afraid it would burst out of his chest. His mouth became dry and it was hard to swallow. With shaking fingers, he replies back. 

 _How in the bloody fucking hell did you get this number? -B_  

Ping. 

 _Doesn't matter. All that matter is that now we can finally talk._  

_Why? Why would he want to talk to me?_

Ping.  

The notification ringer was becoming unnerving.  

 _So, let's talk shall we? We can talk about good old times that we've had together._  

 _No! I'm not going to talk to you. Whatever we had in the past is over. I'm done with you and your bullshit. Now I'm going to block this number and you and I won't have anything to do with each other. So fuck off. -B_  

Bilbo quickly went to his settings to block Smaug's number, but Smaug was a master of texting because his next reply came in what felt like seconds later. 

 _So what? If I could find your number what makes you think that would stop me from contacting you? I just want to talk. And so what would you do if I contacted you again? Send your rugged guard dog at me again?_  

Bilbo knew that Smaug was taunting him. He wanted to lure Bilbo into keeping up the conversation just to get what he wanted. But when he mentioned his 'rugged guard dog' he knew that he meant Thorin. So, he caved in. 

 _You leave Thorin out of this! -B_  

 _Oh? You're quick to loyalty for someone who doesn't know you that well, like I do._  

 _No of course not_ , Bilbo wanted to say. Of course, Thorin didn’t know that he was gay or that the piece of shit that was talking to him used to be his boyfriend. Thorin would take him for a fool if he ever learned that Bilbo dated his bully in the past.  

 _Doesn't matter. This conversation is over. So fuck off you piece of shit. -B_  

Bilbo ignored the text notification that kept ringing; not caring if Smaug was taunting or threatening him. He went straight for his settings and immediately blocked the number. The texts immediately stopped. He went to his messages and didn’t give into his curiosity when he saw the conversation on top of the list. He deleted it quickly and relished when the chat vanished forever on his phone. His book was entirely forgotten and he felt paranoid. In a strange hysterical way, he felt as if Smaug was watching him right now; he looked up, eyes scanning frantically around the library and saw students studying or scrolling through their phones. He breathed slowly trying to calm his heart and his nerves. He was going to need a real strong cuppa...no a hard drink sounds damn good right about now.  

Ping.  

 _Oh, dear Yavanna._  

He opened his phone again and stared at the green chat bubble signaling him that he had one new message. 

 _Fuck! Does he have more than one phone number?_  

He blankly looked at the screen and it took him a few moments until he decided to open it. 

 _Hey. I hope you have a good day today. I was wondering if you're not busy you can watch me practice? -T_  

Ping. 

 _You know, so we can meet up again in person and schedule a time where we can have our tutoring session. -T_  

Relief. Sweet and beautiful relief. A weight was lifted off of Bilbo's shoulders as he re-read the text again from Thorin. He was so happy that it was Thorin and what made it better was that he wished him a good day. His eyes almost threatened to spill a few tears, but he kept it inside. 

 _Hello._ _I hope you have a good day too. :)_ _I would be happy to see you practice, let me know what time. -B_  

 _~_  

Lunch came around and Bilbo was finally done with his classes for the day. Mondays were usually his easiest days with only having two classes and they were both over at lunchtime which left room for him to study for the rest of day. He didn’t bother texting Ori, knowing too well that he wouldn't get a quick response from him. In fact, he hadn’t touched his phone since he replied back to Thorin. The mere thought of the possibility that the next text could be Smaug had him on edge. Bilbo had to find time to squeeze in an appointment to get his phone number changed. Lunchtime often lead him to the cafeteria where they would sell delicious fatty cheeseburgers, spaghetti, burritos, and other savory delicacies that made Bilbo's stomach extremely happy. But he ignored the cafeteria and went to his dorm instead. He managed to hide them from Ori, but he had baby carrots and celery secretly stocked up.  

Bilbo couldn’t help himself. This morning as he was waiting for Ori to pick a damn outfit for the day (because lately ever since he'd been getting cozy with Dwalin, he'd been hyperaware of how he dressed), he looked at himself in the mirror. All he saw were his ugly eyeglasses, his ugly brown cardigan that made him look bigger than usual, and his ugly curly hair that never cooperated. Bilbo knew that the crash diet was unsuccessful and made him faint and snapped at everyone and downright miserable, but he didn't see any other choice. His schoolwork was always in the way so he had no time to go to the gym. Also with school being his entire life there was no room to have a healthy home cooked meal, so fast food became his toxic best friend.  

He opened the door to his dorm and went straight for the mini fridge. He saw the celery sticks and baby carrots and grabbed as many as he could. _Maybe if I eat more and drink more green tea I'll feel a bit fuller?_ He plugged in his small portable burner and filled his kettle with water. He managed to hide the green tea away from Ori.  

He looked at his 'lunch' before him and his stomach growled angrily at him, practically begging him to go back to the cafeteria and get a hamburger or at least a side salad with a lot of ranch on top. He ignored his stomach and begans to stuff his face with his vegetables. He ate the celery first since they were his least favorite. He loved celery in soups and stews, but something about eating raw celery didn't settle with him. The celery was crunchy and watery and to Bilbo it didn’t taste good. Bilbo was tempted to buy a dressing to mask the flavor but he read online that even fat free dressings were bad for you, filled with sweeteners and that it could make you hungry again within an hour or so. They recommend people to eat the regular dressing or at least 50% less fat while carefully measure the serving, so he thought he might as well eat his veggies raw; because he already knows himself, once he got a dressing he'd pour it all over the vegetables, so better safe than sorry.  

The kettle began to whistle and he poured the hot water into his mug and watched the teabag soak. It didn’t take long for green tea to brew, only a couple of minutes. Bilbo chuckled to himself a bit, thinking of his grandmother and if she ever saw Bilbo drinking tea that came from a small paper bag and in a mug no less, he would've had the biggest scolding of his life. _"Tea should be in the form of tea leaves, not in the form of sand in small cheesecloth like bags. And drinking from a mug! Why, that's simply blasphemous. Tea should be in beautiful tea cups and delicate saucers, not in a tankard! The nerve!"_  

He downed the green tea without any sugar or honey, hoping that its magic would burn up his fat. The tea was bitter because he steeped it in for too long, but he tolerated it. He ate his baby carrots a bit more slowly. The carrots were sweet and almost fruity in a bitter way, but the chewing of eating raw crunchy veggies became tiring and he was starting to feel like a rabbit. Afterwards, he chugged his green tea hoping that it would trick his stomach into thinking that it was full.  

Ping. 

 _My practice is at 3:30 today. So you can stop by whenever. -T_  

Getting a text from Thorin made Bilbo's heart thump like a hummingbird. 

~ 

The rugby team was inside the gym doing their squats and some lifting before they head out to train for their upcoming game. As Thorin was doing his Romanian deadlifts he, yet again, thought about if his texts to Bilbo were casual enough. _It's a good thing I saved myself in that last text,_ Thorin thought. Asking Bilbo to watch him practice didn't sound gay at all, right? Well it was a good thing he saved his ass from sending a quick response asking what time their next tutoring lesson will begin...yeah definitely a good save.  

CLANG! 

"Dwalin! Focus!" shouted Coach Bard. Thorin looked over to see Dwalin that he dropped a few metal dumbbells on the floor. Once Thorin finished with his reps he went over to Dwalin who was doing suicides.  

"Dwalin?" 

Dwalin panted and looked up at Thorin, his face was red and sweaty and his eyes glanced over toward his bag where his cellphone was. 

"You alright?" 

"Rasup ogamut men." 

"What's bugging you then? You're always focused when we stretch before we start playing on the field." 

"It's nothing! Why are you being so nosy?" Dwalin asked with his face redder than before and Thorin knew it wasn’t from working out. 

Thorin chortled, "You know just about a week ago you kept bugging the shit out of me who I was hanging out with and even set me up with Bilbo, which I still never thanked you for by the way, and now you're telling me that I'm being nosy? Ha!" 

"Shut up Durin! I'm just...nervous alright?" 

"Nervous? Who? You? C'mon you're joking with me." 

Dwalin grumbled and shoved Thorin to the side and started to do his lifting reps. Thorin sighed; it can come to such a shock to some people who didn’t know Dwalin like Thorin did, but Dwalin can be sensitive sometimes. Thorin looked around and grabbed two dumbbells so Coach Bard wouldn’t nag him for not doing anything.  

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry I was insensitive, but what do you got to be so nervous about? The game is still a month away so-" 

"It's. Not. About. The. Game." Dwalin said with a grunt as he was lifting himself on the bar. 

"Okay, so if it's not about the game then what is it? Since when did you get all secretive? Cause the only private one here is me. Am I starting to rub off on you?" Thorin smirked. Dwalin groaned as he finished his reps and came down from the bar. He didn’t look at Thorin in the eye and Thorin was becoming a little bit concerned.  

"I uh...invited someone over to watch me practice." 

"Pfft!" Thorin tried to hold in his laugh, but to no avail.  

"It's not funny!" Dwalin shouted. 

"I'm sorry! But it's hilarious! You've always been so confident whenever you date or even have a hookup with someone. Alright, who is she then?" 

"It's uhm.... it’s not...it's not a girl." 

Without missing a beat Thorin said, "Okay, who is **he** then?" 

Dwalin looked up at Thorin with disbelief. 

"C'mon Dwalin. You should know by now that I don't give a shit who you fuck around with, right? I know you're bi." 

"Well...uhm...it's that red head lad that I've been kind of seeing at the library lately." 

"Oh yeah? Well then don't be nervous, I asked Bilbo to come and watch me-" Thorin shuts up quick when Dwalin quirked a knowing brow.  

 _Why didn't I shut the fuck up? Why didn't I shut the fuck up? Why didn't I shut the fuck up?_  

"Oh ho, really? You and Bilbo getting cozy already?" 

It was Thorin's turn to grumble, "No! I'm done talking about this!" 

"No, no, no! Don't think you'll get away with this, you're the one who started all of this, so let it out." 

"You do realize that I have dumbbells in my hands and I could smack you with them if I really wanted to, right?" Dwalin raised his hands and whisperd fair enough, but still had that shit eating grin on his face. 

Dwalin walked over to do some more stretching before their training started; Thorin could still hear him chuckling over what he said. Angrily, Thorin lifted the dumbbells quickly repeating over and over in his heads, _WHY DIDN'T I SHUT THE FUCK UP? WHY DIDN'T I SHUT THE FUCK UP?!_  

~ 

3:30pm rolled by quick and Bilbo sat on the bleachers where he could get a full view of the field. He didn’t feel awkward that much since there were already a few students sitting on the bleachers taking selfies or snapping on their snapchats or simply enjoying the weather.  

 _It is a nice day to have a stroll._  

What Bilbo didn't expect though was to see Ori. 

"Bilbo? What are you doing here?" 

"Oh. Thorin asked me to come and watch him play, but uhm of course, what he really wanted was to ask me when will our next tutoring session would be." 

"Couldn't he just have told you that through text?" 

 _Ugh! Yavanna! He's so fucking nosy._  

"Uhm, so what brings you here anyways? You don't care much for any kind of sport." 

"Well neither do you." Ori said with a smirk. Bilbo could feel the tip of his ears turning red. He knew that Ori already knew that Bilbo had a crush on Thorin, but he was still going to deny it, even though he didn’t know why he wanted to deny it. 

"Oh look! They're starting!" Bilbo said hoping that Ori would drop the subject once he saw Dwalin on the field. 

Coach Bard ordered his team to divide so they would play against each other. Funnily enough, Dwalin and Thorin were on opposite teams. Each of them staring at each other both sharing an equal understanding that they were not going to be easy on each other (and to prove to their crushes on who was the biggest and strongest). Coach Bard blew his whistle and the drop kick strikes. Each team yelled and hustled at whoever has the ball.  

To Bilbo's shame, he had never been so turned on in all his life. It was like watching gladiators fight to the death with their shirts off and their chests oiled up. One of Thorin's teammates threw the ball in the air while he was tackled to the ground. Thorin jumped as high as he could and reached the ball. His team defending him from other tacklers, but none of them were strong enough as Dwalin rammed right through them like an out of control locomotive. Thorin sprinted with the ball in his hands and ran toward the opponent’s side. Dwalin was only inches away before Thorin touch downed the ball. Cheers from benchwarmers and even some of some of the people that were seated on the benches roared with excitement. 

Bilbo found himself standing from his seat and clapped. Thorin looked over and spotted Bilbo; he flashed a smile and dared himself to give a wink at him.  

Bilbo could swear that his heart broke out of his ribcage and flew. 

The smell of grass, the bleachers that had been warmed by the sun, the cheer of people brought flashbacks to Bilbo's middle school years and it overcame his mind which suddenly made him feel sorrowful.  

~   
_Middle school._  

 _Bilbo was always a bit on the round side since he was a child. But he was never obese, he was a healthy hefty child and throughout the beginning of his childhood he didn't have bullies. He always played in his mother's garden and loved to hear his father's stories and hope to become the best story teller in the world. Sure, his friends teased him every now and then about his weight, but Bilbo was too young and naive to understand that they were really making fun of him instead of laughing with him. As he grew older his weight never changed, but suddenly when puberty struck him everything seemed to matter. Now he was starting to see the imperfections that everyone saw and the two biggest things that made him practically hate himself were his weight and his hideous eyeglasses._  

 _Having middle school insecurities came with the package of being a teenager, but my goodness did Bilbo hate it. He hated it more than anyone. Suddenly his weight became a huge deal. Everyone could see his muffin tops and his bum was just a bit bigger than what a normal teenage boy should have, so he started wearing shapeless clothes so that no one could see his weight, but that also became another issue. Tight fitted clothes were in...and of course whatever Bilbo would wear wasn't and that added to the list of becoming a target._  

 _And if being considered "overweight" and having horrible taste in clothes was bad enough, the worst was still yet to come to Bilbo Baggins._  

 _When he was a child, he never cared for romance because that was considered yucky and girls had cooties. But as he got older he realized that boys grabbed his attention. Sure, he'd tried to date girls. He liked women, they smelled nice and have pretty laughs and they're down to earth and know what they want. He still remembered his first kiss with one girl from his class. She told him that she liked him and out of nowhere kissed him. Of course, he was in shock and the kiss did feel nice, it was chaste and sweet. As much as he tried to tell himself that it was good and there would never be a more perfect kiss coming from a girl, it didn’t feel right._  

 _He wanted something firm and women couldn't give that to him. Oh, Bilbo did try to date girls but he knew deep in his gut that they weren’t for him, but of course he never said that aloud until **he**  came along._ 

 _If someone ever met a person who knew Bilbo, they would probably tell them that Bilbo's first real bully was Smaug, but that wasn't the case. His first real bully was a sleazy character that gave everyone, including the teachers, the creeps. He had big round almost bulging like blue eyes; his skin was paper thin and he was sickly pale. He had greasy shaggy brown hair with curls at the end and he always had an awful cough that sounded raspy, making it sound like his lungs had a disease or an infection._  

 _His name was Smeagol._  

 _Smeagol was easily bullied because of the way he looked and the way he hacked and Bilbo felt sorry for him. So, he decided to befriend him. They would come up with ways to challenge themselves by giving each other riddles to solve. Oh, but Smeagol was cunning with his persuasion._  

 _"C'mon Bilbo, why don't you tell us what's going on your mind?"_  

 _Smeagol always said 'us' instead of 'me' and 'we' instead of 'I'. In the beginning, it was unnerving for Bilbo, but after becoming friends with him he'd grown used to it._  

 _"Tell you what?"_  

 _"Well, we see that you date girls here and there, but you never stay with them for long."_  

 _Bilbo was nervous to say the least, but he trusted Smeagol. He was just like Bilbo, always bullied by his appearance and not having any friends in the slightest. So, Bilbo sealed his fate and told Smeagol that he came to terms with himself out that he was gay and that he liked star athlete in-almost-every-single-sport in school, Hugh Proudfoot._  

 _In an instant, Smeagol told Bilbo to not hold back but to tell Hugh how he truly felt. He assured Bilbo that Hugh would be understanding and said, "Who knows! Maybe he'll even like you back. We never saw him with any girls before, so maybe he's like you."_  

 _And that was that. That gave Bilbo the confirmation and confidence he needed, so he decided to tell him that day._  

 _It was the pep rally that day and Hugh was, of course, the star quarterback player for football. Cheers and people stomping on their feet on the bleachers echoed the field. It was a lot of fun and once it was over Bilbo saw the chance to go up to Hugh and tell him how he felt_    
   
_The voice of Smeagol whispered in his head, **"Maybe he likes you too."**_  

 _Bilbo went inside the locker room where he saw Hugh all dressed out of his uniform and approached him with hope overflowing in his heart._  

 _He told him._  

 _He was crushed._  

 _He was in tears._  

 _And before he knew it, the entire team came in as he was confessing with Smeagol behind them._  

 _They laughed._  

 _They threw stuff at him and Smeagol was in the back laughing so hard that tears were on the brim of his eyes._  

 _"Even if I was fag like you, I would never date you. Look at you! Your eyeglasses are ugly to look at! And you’re fat like a pig. I couldn't even get my dick up if I saw your body!"_  

 _Bilbo ran out of the locker room and went straight home. His mother was about to scold him, but once she saw his tears and his panic she stopped what she was doing and cooed him to be calm. It took days to calm him down and he hadn't showed his face at school ever since. He was so terrified of telling his parents of how he felt when he thought about boys, but to his surprise they understood and they could care less on who he loved as long as he was happy._  

 _He went back to school, but throughout the entire week his locker was written with crude_ _graffiti such as: faggot, fairy, pussy, and penises drawn on his locker. His locker was always found wide open filled with garbage and his books tattered and thrown out. Bilbo knew it was the students from his class, but he overheard from someone that Smeagol was the one who planted the idea of the cruel pranks. He came home a mess and tears stained on his face. After that week, his mother pulled him out of school and home schooled him for the rest of the year._  

 _When high school came around he kept his sexuality to himself until Smaug came into his life. But after his time with Smaug was over that's when he saw Thorin. Tall, rugged, muscled, long mane Thorin Durin was the epitome of what a man should look like (at least in Bilbo's point of view) and he hadn't stopped gawking at him ever since._  

 _~_  

Rugby practice was over and both teams were tied. Coach Bard knew that his team was ready for the Arkenstone Tournaments. Ori hopped off the bleachers and ran to Dwalin; Bilbo was much more cautious and met Thorin half-way, away from the team. Bilbo felt warm and tingly all over after watching him train. 

 _Good Yavanna, if he's that intense for practice what's he like when he's playing for real?_  

"Hey!" Thorin panted; his face was still red and his neck gleamed with sweat. Bilbo gulped. 

"U-Uhm hey." 

"You alright? Your face is red, are you not feeling well?" Thorin asked with his brows down from concern. Bilbo cupped his face and laughed nervously. 

"Ah...haha. I'm fine," Bilbo began, "You did so well today. You're amazing on the field." 

It was Thorin's turn to blush, but luckily his face was already red from the practice game.  

"Uh...nah, I made a lot of fouls today...kept tackling too early." Thorin mumbled. 

"Oh, don't be so modest, you were brilliant Thorin...I mean that." Bilbo smiled sheepishly.  

"Thanks. I'm just worried about who Coach Bard is going to make team captain though." 

"Don't worry about it too much. I’m sure it'll be you." 

"How can you be so sure?" Thorin asked curiously, Bilbo sounded so sure of it. 

"Well, I may not know about rugby or any kind of sport, but what I saw out there today was something extraordinary. You gave your team the push that they needed and when you guys were so close to losing I saw you pull them back from their feet to keep pushing themselves. And if even nobody won, you showed everything on what it takes to be a leader." 

Thorin rubbed the back of his neck, certainly not thinking about how much he wanted to kiss Bilbo's plush red cheeks. "So uhm...about the tutoring." Trying to change the subject as quickly as possible because his heart was practically melting.  

"Oh yes! What time would you want to do it?" 

"I think the same time we've always done it.... still want to do it at the library?" 

"If that's what you like, I don't mind where we do our sessions as long you understand the subject." 

 _Oh really? Cause I'd love to study in my room...where we'll be alone and where we could sit closer to each other without having watchful eyes._  

"The library is fine." Thorin said instead.  

There was nothing left to be said so they go their separate ways. Thorin walked over to the locker room and changed out of his uniform. He headed into the showers; the spray of the warm water hit his aching body and loosens his uptight muscles. He lathered himself up and as he was showering he couldn’t stop smiling to himself. He was so hideously happy that him and Bilbo were getting along smoothly. 

~ 

Ori texted Bilbo that he wasn't going to come home anytime soon and Bilbo could understand why. He remembered seeing Ori all flushed and fidgety with his notebook expertly covering his lap. He walked straight to his dorm and thought that he needed a cold shower and a good wank before he took a nap. 

Ping. 

 _I need to change that ringer. It's going to haunt me for the rest of the semester I can feel it._  

He opened his phone and felt exasperated when he saw that it was from none other than Lobelia Baggins.  

 _I am happy to announce that Otho and I have set a date for our wedding. It's a suit and tie event, so please dress accordingly and fashionably. The date would be sent soon and you must bring a chaperone with you. Gifts are welcomed!_  

Bilbo scoffed when read the last bit. _Oh yes, I'm sure gifts are welcomed.... stupid bitch just wants my mother's best silverware._  

 _Oh...and Bilbo please bring a girl. Don't embarrass me. -Lobelia_  

"Oh, don't worry you fucking bitch...I'll definitely bring someone." 

 _That is if he says yes._  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words: 
> 
> Rasup ogamut men- I am not well.
> 
> PS: An update on what has happened to my best friend. We are no longer best friends anymore. She's cut complete contact with me and I still don't understand why, but you know what? Even though it still hurts, I'm not going to let this get in my way. I'm moving forward and it is a bit of a struggle but I know it's for the best. I just wish her happiness and that she'll take care of herself. 
> 
> PS: I hope everyone has an amazing day and may you pass all your classes and eat well.
> 
> PS: If you're dealing with bullying, please tell someone or call a hotline! You are certainly not alone in this world who struggles with bullies and it's best to stand together than face it alone. <3
> 
> PS: bitchykanon.tumblr.com (my tumblr in case you want to talk about anything. Literally anything! You can literally talk to me about how you danced to Frank Sinatra and I would say, "That's pretty rad, which song?" :D)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Oh my god, yet again I have left you guys for a while and I'm so sorry. The good news is that I'm back and feeling a whole lot better! I've cut out toxic people in my life, focused on myself (and given myself a lot of self-love and self-care), passed my math class last semester, I'm learning how to make new friends, and to wrap it all up I'm just plain ol' happy! 
> 
> For those of you who thought I was going to abandon this fic, I absolutely will never leave this fic until it is finished! I care about you guys so much and wow you guys really do motivate me to keep on going, so thank you so much for that. <3
> 
> Without further ado, here's chapter 13 with our love stricken fools.
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> Happy reading!

Throughout the entire week, Lobelia hadn’t stopped texting Bilbo left and right. He’s asked other relatives if they received the same treatment; the constant texts, direct messages, and blatant questions of what gifts they would bring to the wedding. His relatives replied that they only received the one text that she sent to everyone and the cream colored laced RSVP invitation in the mail. Bilbo figured as much, Lobelia had always been on his case since he was a child. Always telling him to lose weight, to get some laser eye surgery so he wouldn't have to wear his hideous eyeglasses anymore, and to find a nice girl to settle down with.  

The constant texts that Lobelia kept sending him sometimes made Bilbo lose focus. On a day when he was tutoring Thorin and helping him with an analytical essay, his phone vibrating non-stop caused him to be distracted on what he was talking about and in turn made Thorin confused. Of course, Bilbo apologized profusely and promised Thorin that it wouldn't happen again. Thorin didn't care as much, but was more concerned what was going on in Bilbo's head. It wasn’t like Bilbo to be out of focus; especially in a subject which was his forte.  

~ 

It was another crisp cool day on the campus. The air was filled with the scent of coffee and musk of the leaves that swooped its way down unto the ground. The chattering of students, as they talk about their week and what they’re going to do on the weekend, echoed throughout the campus as they walked on the crunchy concrete where the leaves had fallen. It was a perfect day outside and Bilbo wanted to do Thorin's tutoring lesson outside, where the birds would be trilling and the sun to warm them up from the cool autumn chill, but he knew that they had to use a printer to print out more essays that Professor Thranduil had given out to Thorin's class. 

"I swear! I think he hates us Bilbo! All these essays that he's giving us is fucking insane!" Thorin exclaimed. 

"Shh! We're in the library Thorin." Bilbo giggled. With tiny clicks and little thumps of keyboards being typed, both worked hard on finishing up Thorin’s essay that was due next week. Bilbo was glad that they both had grown more comfortable with each other. He started to care less and less of how he looked every time he helped Thorin with his English class. Of course, he still had his days where he overdressed a little too much to impress Thorin, but quickly learned that Thorin didn’t seem to care about how he looked; when Thorin himself sometimes came dressed in his sweats and a plain black tee or his gym shorts and stained rugby jersey with his hair in a messy bun or in a low ponytail. 

All through the week of spending time in the library with each other, one learning the basics of English grammar and how to make his essays stronger while the other still learning the harsh language of Khuzdul had grown closer to each other. They still talk of many things; their likes and dislikes. How Thorin missed seeing the mountains back home and how Bilbo missed the sweet smell of his mother’s garden. How Bilbo assured Thorin that he’d most likely be team captain for his team and how Thorin told Bilbo to not worry about his classes, as Thorin puts it, ‘You’re fucking smart! You’ll do fine.’  

The librarian noticed through the week that Bilbo had been tutoring Thorin and left a reserved sign each time they came to help each other. Their corner was secluded from everyone where you couldn’t hear the clacks of typing and frenzied fluttering pages from textbooks; it was surrounded by the must of old literature and art books. The only sound that could be heard was the quiet clicks of Thorin’s laptop. 

The exasperating text messages from Lobelia flooded Bilbo's phone. 

 _Bilbo! Answer me this instant! -Lobelia_  

Buzz buzz. 

 _Bilbo Baggins! I demand to know if you’re coming to my wedding. It wouldn’t be appropriate for you to miss this wedding. -Lobelia_  

Buzz buzz. 

 _Everyone from the Baggins family will be there. Don’t embarrass me on my special day, do you hear me?! -Lobelia_  

The buzzing stopped and Bilbo internally sighed with relief that maybe the texts had finally stopped. Thorin stopped typing and the creases of his brow showed that he was aggravated with what he wrote on the screen. 

“Alright, Thorin. Let me see what you wrote.” Thorin huffed frustratingly and slid his laptop toward Bilbo. 

“Ahaha, oh c’mon Thorin don’t be such a grump. What you probably wrote isn’t all that bad.” 

“I’m not a grump.” Thorin mumbled. Oh, if only Bilbo was going out with this man, he would’ve taken his phone out and taken a picture of Thorin pouting; it really was a bit cute.  

“Alright, Mr. I’m-Not-A-Grump, let’s see how you did.” 

“Prepare yourself, it’s pretty shitty.” 

Bilbo rolled his eyes, “Oh come off it Thorin it can’t be that- “ 

Buzz buzz.  

Bilbo sighed. The nonstop buzzing in the back of his pocket was aggravating him. Bilbo wanted to turn his phone off completely, but one of his relatives had told him that they were going to give him a call sometime during the day. _Why couldn’t you just fucking tell me what time you were going to call?_   

Thorin noticed Bilbo's phone going off like mad and wondered if Bilbo had gotten himself a girlfriend. What other explanation could it be if not having a special someone constantly texting his phone? Is she pretty? Does she smell nice? _Of course, you idiot! Most girls smell nice._ _Is she nice? Does she like to read literature like Bilbo?_ _Should I ask? What if he says that he does have a girlfriend? What in Mahal would I do with myself if he does? Change universities? Go back home?_ That's when Thorin heard that Bilbo had asked him a question. 

"Yes?" Thorin somewhat shouted. A hiss of shushing came from other students trying their best to study for their upcoming tests. 

A bit rosy on his cheeks Thorin replied 'yes' much more quietly. 

"Well uhm... I was wondering...that is if you're not busy. Or would even want to... what I'm trying to say is...uhm...uhmm-"  

 _Spit it out Baggins! What the hell is wrong with you? SPIT IT OUT!_  

"Bilbo." Thorin said gruffly.  

Bilbo swore that his heart dropped. One word. His name being said. That's all it could take to make his heart drop? _Oh Yavanna...you really must like him._  

"Y-Yeah?" 

"Whatever you want to say you can just say it, you know? Now, what are you trying to ask me?"  

Bilbo mustered up whatever courage he had and looked at Thorin. His eyes were so blue like the deepest and darkest ocean and Bilbo practically swooned. He hadn't noticed that he was moving closer to Thorin; their forearms brushed up against each other, the smell of Thorin's pine scented cologne flowed through Bilbo's nose, and his heat radiated off his skin. _What the fuck...when did I scoot over?_   

“I want to ask you if- “  

“Bilbo! There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!” Ori said with his red hair ruffled up and his cheeks red.  

“Ssshh!” students hissed. 

“Sorry.” Ori whispered, “Bilbo! I’ve been looking for you. Someone came by our dorm. She looked really upset.”  

 _No…it couldn’t be. She wouldn’t go this far to come over to his campus just because he ignored her texts…right? No. That would be crazy._  

“Ori…what did she look like?” 

“Well she had such an angry face, all red cheeked and she looked so flustered. She had somewhat dark brown curly hair. Dark brown eyes. Oh, and Bilbo she wore the gaudiest pea green dress with florals and a weird feathered over the top hat! Bleh! It was horrible! I almost showed her the nearest boutique to buy herself new clothes. Who is she?” 

Bilbo shook his head and felt that this day wasn’t going to end well. “Don’t worry about her Ori. What did she say?” 

“Well she wasn’t really nice. She had a nasty bitchy attitude. She said, and I quote, ‘Would you please tell Bilbo to come meet me by the fountain today. Can you believe the nerve of him to ignore my texts? Why I never-’ And I sort of tuned her out cause all she did was complain about how awful you were.” 

“Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. Sorry Thorin, can we cut our session short for the day? I need to take care of this.” 

Thorin hid his disappointment and his curiosity about this mystery woman. “Sure. It’s no problem. The essay isn’t due till next week.”  

“Ahkminruki astu” Bilbo said with confidence. Thorin’s blue eyes lit up and his face split into a smile. 

“Hey, not bad Bilbo. You’ve gotten better.” 

Bilbo’s confidence shot up high in the sky and his face turned red as a rose.   

“Uhm…thanks Thorin.” Bilbo said quietly as he was twisting his overgrown sleeves. He grabbed his things and somehow shoved them neatly inside his messenger bag. He waved back to Thorin and walked out with Ori who was still asking him many questions on who the woman was.  

Thorin looked out till he saw that Bilbo was gone. Thorin stared at his work. The cursor blinking at him mockingly. With a frustrated huff, he snapped his laptop shut and he was out of the library. 

Thorin hated being jealous, but he couldn't help himself thinking about this woman texting Bilbo nonstop. His friend did say that she was telling him how awful Bilbo was and that made his blood boil. He rewinds memories in his head thinking if he ever saw Bilbo with any woman in high school, but couldn't think of anyone aside from his friends hanging around with him. The girls in high school didn't seem interested in Bilbo, which Thorin to this day still can't imagine why. He was perfect, cute, smart, had a quick wit, adorably shy at times, and had the most gorgeous eyes and smile and arse. But at the same time Thorin was happy that they weren't intrigued by him so he could have him all to himself. It was a selfish thought, he already knew that, but he could care less. He wanted to have Bilbo all to himself. Thorin shook his thoughts and whipped out his phone daring to think that he should send a text message to Bilbo asking him to the woman was, but he stopped himself. Instead he went back to his dorm with an unfished essay in his hands inside his laptop. 

~ 

Bilbo couldn’t stop sighing today. The chill in the air couldn't soothe out his hot anger. _I can't fucking believe that she would go this far to just fucking talk to me! Unbelievable!_  There she was waiting by the fountain, and yup it was just like Ori said, she was wearing that ugly pea green dress with tropical flowers embroidered on the skirt and she accessorized herself with large jewelry (because of course she had to make herself known that she was rich) and topped off with a large feathered hat. She looked ridiculous. If Bilbo wasn't so frustrated with her, he would've laughed hysterically.  

"I don't like to be kept waiting Bilbo," she sneered. 

"Well I don't like it when one of my least favorite relatives comes to my school campus unannounced." Bilbo replied with a grin. Lobelia's cheeks grew red. 

"I didn't come here to make a fool out of myself-" 

"You already did by wearing that." Bilbo said. 

Lobelia scoffed, "How dare you! This is the latest fashion back home!" 

Bilbo laughed at that, "Oh really? Since when? Not even the women in the Victorian era would've worn such a hideous thing. But anyways, please do continue your useless rant."  

"Listen here you fat pig!" 

 _Ouch. Okay that one hurt a bit._   

"I came all the way here to this tacky campus of yours, to tell you that you will come to my wedding because the entire Baggins' will be there, and I won't have Bungo's son not attend a Baggins' wedding! And you will chaperone a girl, do you hear me! Throughout the entire years of the Baggins' line there hasn't been any fags! I won't be embarrassed by the entire Shire because of you, I won't! Do you hear me Bilbo Baggins? she shouted. Her chest heaved and her neck and face flushed an angry red.  

But she wasn’t wrong. There weren’t any gays in the Baggins family, nor had there ever been, Bilbo was the first. There were some in the Took family perhaps, but they either moved away from the Shire or lived in Bree; anything to stay away from the Baggins family in the Shire. How his father fell in love with his wild mother, he never knew, but it was a love that he admired and hoped that he would have that love that his parents had.  

"Don't you fucking dare bring my father into this, you bitch! My father has nothing to do with this!" 

"Oh, but he does you fat faggot! You're the only heir for the entire property of Bag End, which you know damn well that belongs to Otho and I!" 

"NO IT DOES NOT BLOODY FUCKING BELONG TO YOU," Bilbo yelled, "This conversation is over! I'll go to your tacky wedding and show up, but you're going to listen because Bag End will never belong to you, bitch! Now fuck off!" 

Lobelia twisted her dress in anger and stormed off screaming how she’d never been so insulted in all her life. Bilbo's hands were shaking with adrenaline and the sting of hot tears threatened to fall. _No... no. I'm not going to cry because of her. I'm not going to cry because she called me...fa-_  

"Bilbo! There you are! Did you fix everything with that...hey. What's wrong? What happened?" Ori says.  

"It's nothing. I don't want to talk about it." Bilbo shoved Ori aside and told him that he needed some time alone to think. 

~ 

The field was littered with rugby players tackling each other. Coach Bard had been keeping a sharp eye on who he wanted as team captain. Some managed to almost make the cut, but only one had stood out the most. Thorin was a strong player and he trained well. The team liked him and most of his ideas were well planned and successful.  

Coach Bard blew his whistle and asked everyone to go to the bleachers. The bleachers were warm from the sun and everyone was secretly thankful that they were.  

"Now as all of you know I have been looking for a team captain for this team. And I have found one." 

Whispers floated around the players, "Quiet." Coach Bard said, "The person that I choose as team captain must know that there will be responsibilities hanging on his shoulders; Thorin I think you can handle it."  

A roar of cheers swept through the field and Thorin was in a daze. _Why are they cheering? Did I hear that right? Me?_  

"Thorin! You son of a bitch! Congrats," Dwalin laughed. Coach Bard handed him the patch that would represent him as team captain. 

"I know you'll make us proud, yes?" 

"Yes." Thorin said quietly.  

"Alright everyone! We'll end our training early for the day, so head on out of here." The team go on their separate ways, each of them congratulating Thorin for becoming team captain.  

"Hey! We should celebrate! Let's go grab a drink and party with the team!" Dwalin whooped.  

"Y-Yeah. I'll catch up with you later." 

Dwalin left muttering to himself if he should bring Ori along to the party. Thorin was alone sitting on the warm bleachers and was still in shock, but he didn’t know why.  

 _This is what I wanted, so why am I not happy about it? I worked my ass off to get this position, so why am I not with Dwalin grabbing drinks? Why?! Why do I feel like shit?_  

He grabbed his phone from his gym bag and saw that Bilbo hadn't sent him a text almost all day since he went to see that woman. His face felt feverish with the pang of jealousy. _What the fuck? Why hasn't he texted me back?_ He almost sent him an angry text, but stopped himself immediately. He shouldn't be taking his angry jealousy on Bilbo when he hadn’t done anything wrong. He typed out a quick text telling him that he got the position and hoped that Bilbo would at least congratulate him.  

~ 

Usually when Bilbo goes out to think he would be in the library. The books were always filled with countless thinkers who put their philosophies in pen and paper and had helped many people. It even helped Bilbo sometimes on certain things. But today he was cooped up in his dorm with the lights off, the blinds shut, and his door closed.  

 _Fat pig, huh? She's not wrong there._  

Ping. 

Ori had been texting Bilbo nonstop wondering if he was okay or if he needed anything to eat. Eating was the last thing Bilbo wanted right now, no matter how much his stomach craved for a greasy burger that the cafeteria was selling today. He searched for his phone on his nightstand and the bright screen nearly blinded him when he unlocked his phone. His heart stopped a beat.

One new message from Thorin. 

 _I made team captain. -T_  

A rush of excitement raced through his body, making him feel alive when he had felt dead almost all day. He replied back: 

 _ASLKJDUFGVGN87! That's amazing Thorin! I'm so happy for you <3 <3 <3 See! I told you that you would get it! You must be so happy! -B_ 

Ping. 

 _Haha! You just made my day. Tbh I wasn't actually all that happy getting it. -T_  

 _"_ What? Why would he say that?" 

 _Why? Isn't it what you always wanted? -B_  

Ping. 

 _It was...I mean it still is...I mean idk! -T_  

 _Talk to me Thorin. What's on your mind? -B_  

Ping. 

 _I don't know! I wanted it so bad but now that I have it...what if I fail? What if I'm a horrible captain? Everyone is looking up to me even Coach Bard! I'm going to fail, I just know it! -T_  

"Oh no, Thorin." Bilbo groaned. Looks like Thorin wasn’t as perfect as Bilbo made him out to be because just like everyone else in the world, he was afraid to fail. He wasn’t going to stand for this. There was absolutely no way that he was going to let Thorin feel this way, he had to make it better somehow. Without even thinking he pressed the call button. With the second ring, Thorin picked up. 

"Bilbo?" 

"You listen to me Thorin Durin and you listen good! You know why Coach Bard chose you? Because he knows that you're the best! And besides you've been team captain in high school before, what's the difference with this one?" 

"Everything! High school was just that, it was high school. It wasn't anything serious! I played because it was fun, but this is college and there'll be scouts on the bleachers watching me if I make a mistake! And I-" 

"Thorin! Thorin, love. You don't have to worry about anything. Coach Bard chose because he knows that you'll do amazing. Your team looks up to you because they know that you're good at what you do. You shouldn't put yourself down when you've worked this hard to get what you wanted." 

"Did...did you just call me love?" 

 _Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!_  

"Bilbo? Are you still there?" 

"Y-Y-Yes! I'm still h-here!" Bilbo croaked. _Oh Yavanna, this can't get any worse, can it?_  

"You...you called me love, right? I heard that, right?" 

 _Oh no, no, no, no! What should I tell him? Okay, what rhymes with love? Dove? NO! That's even worse! Uhm! Think, think, think!_  

"Uhm... I have to ask you something!" Bilbo said, hoping that changing the subject would make him forget his stupid mistake. 

"Yes?" Thorin asked quietly.  

"It's actually the same question that I was going to ask you in the library. Well one of my relatives is getting married and they require that everyone comes with a chaperone. And I was planning on staying home for the weekend...and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me?" 

 _No...no, no, no, no, no! I take it back! I take it all back! Oh, I wish I could turn time and not ask him! He's going to say no, I just know it. He's going to say no. He's going to say no. He's going to say no. He's going to say no._  

"Yes." 

 _What?_  

"What?! Y-You said yes?" 

"Yeah, I know how boring weddings can be and besides it'll be nice to see your home. The way you talk about it seemed nice. And I need to get away from the city and from all of this. I think the weekend away with you is just what I needed honestly." 

"Really?" 

"Yeah. So, I guess I'll have to buy a suit and tie, huh?" 

 _Oh, sweet heavens...Thorin in a suit. I need to lie down._  

"Haha...yeah I guess so," Bilbo said weakly, "I'll let you know when to get ready, okay?" 

"Yeah thanks. I have to go now though." 

"Oh." 

"I kinda don't want to hang up." Thorin said sheepishly. Bilbo blushed and couldn't wipe off his goofy smile.  

"I'll hang up then." Bilbo mumbled, even though he really didn’t want to. He wanted to listen Thorin's husky voice all day. 

"Before you do...thanks." 

"For what?" 

"For calling. I needed it." Bilbo can easily picture Thorin rubbing his neck out of embarrassment. Ever since Bilbo had been hanging out with Thorin, he realized that Thorin was generally a serious person and didn’t express his emotions that much, but hearing him so vulnerable made Bilbo feel special. It was like having a shared secret.  

"I'll see you tomorrow Thorin." 

"See you tomorrow, love." Thorin said soothingly. 

Click.  

It wasn't Bilbo who hung up. He was too stunned on what he just heard.   

 _I'm going to need a cold shower and a good wank._  

Bilbo went inside his tiny bathroom and turned on the knob to freezing cold. He couldn't stop thinking Thorin's voice. 

 _He_ _called me love..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes cause I haven't written anything in a really long time and I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Khuzdul Words:
> 
> Ahkminruki astu- See you later ((I think. I forgot to bookmark where I found this, so if anyone can find it let me know so I can edit the true definition))
> 
> PS: bitchykanon.tumblr.com (my tumblr in case you want to talk about anything <3)
> 
> PS: I'm taking an Intro to Fiction class, so hopefully I'll get some pointers and some strong criticism on my writing skills so I can improve for not only myself, but for you guys too because you deserve the best. <3
> 
> PS: Happy Pride Day to everyone! <3 Remember love is love! <3


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I am not dead! :D 
> 
> I've just been busy working at my job, more self-care/self-healing, and organizing myself to be prepared for the semester. Hopefully when school starts the updates won't get any slower, but no promises. I'm taking three classes and one of them is statistics so my future home is going to be at the tutoring center. T^T
> 
> I want you all to know that I see all your wonderful comments and it makes me so happy to see that you guys are enjoying this story. And my goodness gracious, almost 500 kudos?!!! You guys are such sweet hearts!!!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> Happy reading!

_I called him love._ _What am I? A damn fool that’s what I am! Why in Mahal’s name did I say that?_ Thorin didn’t know what to think after the phone call with Bilbo. Aside from calling each other love, he was going to see Bilbo in a suit…a suit! _Would he wear a vest? Would he have a cute flower pinned to his suit? What color would he wear? Oh, maroon would look best on him._

“Fuck…I need a shower,” Thorin mumbled to himself.

Thorin undressed himself and looked hard at his reflection. He saw his long hair, his sharp nose (which he lowkey kind of hated), and his beard that needed a slight trim soon. He always carried an intimidating face which managed to make people stay far away from him, but he wasn’t an idiot though. He knew he was an attractive person and there were times where he used it to his advantages, but if Bilbo did like him, he hoped that it wasn’t because of his looks. He hoped that it was something more than his physicality; he hoped it was because he liked to listen to him and enjoyed his company, it’s honestly all he ever wanted from a person. He figured that he was never an interesting person, unlike his eccentric sister and brother. But Bilbo seemed to like him, so it was enough for Thorin.

He hopped into the shower and washed his thick black hair. He was in a daze for a bit, letting the hiss of the shower echo the small bathroom. It was then that he realized that he doesn’t have a suit.

“Mahal! Fuuucckk!”

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! “You’re not jacking off in there are ya?” asked Dwalin from outside the bathroom door.

“No, you arsehole! I’m just frustrated!”

“Wow what a fucking surprise.” Dwalin laughed. Thorin rolled his eyes and continued bathing. He heard Dwalin pounding on the door again.

“For Mahal’s sake! What do you want?!” Thorin shouts.

“Hurry up in there! I need to take a shower too, ya know?”

“What? I just got in here! Fuck off!”

He heard nothing, but he waited a minute or two before he resumed back to what he was doing.

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

_Mahal, shits on my dinner once again._

“Mahal help! WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?!”

“Nothing. Just wanted to bother you.” Dwalin said. He snickered off into the other side of the dorm.

Thorin decided that he should buy his suit today, yes definitely today! After this shower in fact, so he would stay far away from Dwalin.

~

As soon as Ori found out that the woman who was cruel to Bilbo was one of his relatives set his nerves on edge. He couldn’t believe that a relative would be so cruel to their own flesh and blood, but he didn’t elaborate too much about it towards Bilbo. He knew that Bilbo had enough problems to deal with once he goes home.

“So, she said that you needed to find a chaperone? A chaperone, seriously? What is this, this Victorian era?”

“Haha, yeah that’s what she sent to everyone.”

“So…who is your chaperone. Don’t tell me you found a girl to go with you because I know you Bilbo Baggins. Girls aren’t your thing.”

“I think you know who I asked, Ori.” Bilbo said with smirk. Ori’s eyes grew and so did his smile.

“You asked him?!”

Bilbo’s blush gave it away as he nodded. He couldn’t help but giggle like a schoolboy.

“Oh, Bilbo! I’m so happy for you! You finally asked him out!”

“Wait what? No! I just asked if he wanted to accompany me.”

“Uh-huh sure. So, quick question…where’s he gonna sleep?” Ori asked with a cheeky grin.

“That’s obvious he’s going to... he’s going to sleep at… oh no. I don’t know! Oh, dear Yavanna, where is he going to sleep? Ugh! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why didn’t I think of this sooner? Ori! Where is he going to sleep?!” he asked Ori as if he knew the answer. His friend just laughed at him.

“He’s going to sleep with you of course.” Ori said winking at him. Bilbo could feel his face blushing and imagined what would it be like to have Thorin sleep beside him. Does he steal the covers? Does he sleep on his back or stomach? Does he like to cuddle? Does he like to be the big spoon or the little spoon? Does he sleep without a shirt on? Bilbo sure hopes he doesn’t sleep with a shirt on. Would he be warm like a furnace? Does he snore? Does he put his hair into a ponytail or let his hair down?

Bilbo heard Ori calling out his name, “Hm? What?”

“I lost you there for a sec.” Ori said with a smirk, “Listen. You can worry about Thorin rooming with you later, the most important thing is finding a suit for you.”

“I have a nice suit! See?” Bilbo went through his closet and took out a suit that had been protected by a vinyl garment cover. He took it out and showed it to his friend. Ori stared at it blankly and Bilbo started to get nervous. When it came down to fashion, Ori was as brutally honest as Michael Kors from Project Runway. The suit had a muddy brown jacket that had seen better days. The shirt was and off white color that had a frilly tie. The pants were the same color as the jacket and the vest was a mix between an orange and maroon color. Overall, it was horrible.

“Bilbo… this looks absolutely hideous. Who the hell gave this to you?”

“My father. Does it really look that bad?”

“I’m not gonna say what I really want to say because it’ll hurt your dad’s feelings. So, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going out shopping to get you a proper suit. Cuffs and all!”

Going out shopping with a friend did seem fun to Bilbo. He doesn’t remember a time where he went out shopping with someone else other than himself. He knew it was going to be fun, but this wasn’t book shopping. This was shopping for clothes, a thing that Bilbo still wasn’t used to. Finding clothes for his size was going to send his mind with dark thoughts or hearing the sinister whispers from the bullies and relatives telling him how fat and ugly he’d look or laughing at him for trying on clothes that weren’t made for him.

“Uhm… I don’t know Ori. You sure this suit won’t be fine? I mean it fits me nice and I won’t stick out as much with it, you know?”

“Seriously? You’re going to wear that shit looking jacket at the wedding? Because it fits you and it makes you magically invisible? I think the fuck not! We’re going suit shopping together and you’re going to be cracking necks when they see you!”

And that was that. No one could change Ori’s mind, especially when it came down to fashion. They both grabbed their wallets and keys and went straight to the bus station.

~

They both arrived at a shop that had many nice suits. There were walls of different styles and colors of suit jackets hung with wooden hangers. Three long and big wooden tables were laid out and had a glass top where customers could see the shiny hand-crafted cufflinks. Each of those tables had countless drawers filled with different sizes and colors of ties. It was overwhelming and Bilbo felt sick to his stomach. The no-face mannequins were all tall and fit something that Bilbo wasn’t. He wanted to leave so badly. Why did he think this was going to be fun?

“Ori? Can we go?”

“What? We just got here. This is one of my favorite stores too. You’re going to find a better suit here.”

“Well, all of this looks expensive.”

“How would you know if it’s expensive.”

“Easy, they have wooden hangers instead of plastic.” Bilbo said with his arms crossed.

_I want to leave. I want to leave. I want to leave. I want to leave. I want to leave._

The sound of the bell alerted that another customer walked in. Bilbo knew who they were once he heard their accents. He turned around and saw Thorin and Dwalin. Both arguing in Khuzdhul; Bilbo knew a few words. The only ones he could make out was ‘idiot’, ‘shut up’, ‘stop’.

“Dwalin?” Ori said. Dwalin stopped talking and went straight to Ori with a bright smile on his face. Bilbo wasn’t sure if he remembered ever seeing Dwalin smile before, but even he had to admit that he looked handsome when he did.

“I didn’t know you were out shopping.” Thorin said standing beside Bilbo. _When did he get this close?_

“Ori wanted to take me out shopping since the suit I have isn’t proper enough.”

Suddenly, the knots in Bilbo’s stomach stopped from being inside the classy store. He felt much more comfortable with Thorin beside him.

_Just don’t get too comfy you fat idiot._

Whoa. Okay where the hell did that come from, Bilbo wondered. Ori grasped Bilbo’s arm and dragged him to the back where he met the associate. He had tape measure around his neck and a pen tucked behind his ear. Ori explained to him that Bilbo needed a new suit.

“Something that’s going to be comfortable for him to wear and I think a maroon color would do nicely on him.”

Bilbo felt like bacteria under a microscope. The associate was looking at him up and down as he walked around him in a circle. His eyes squinting at him and lips pursed. Yes, he didn’t like this one bit. He knew that this man was judging by how big he was. Probably thinking how on earth was he going to make one of the suits fit into a pig like him.

“I’ll think of something for him. Who’s the other client that needed help?” Ori pointed to Thorin. Now the associate’s eyes sparkled because, yes of course, Thorin was bloody perfect. His body was designed by gods and his face was blessed with perfection. He walked around Thorin much more slowly and Bilbo did notice that he was eyeing Thorin’s thighs and ass. Did that make him jealous? Unfortunately, yes.

“I know the color for this young man right here,” the associate said. He immediately took Thorin’s measurements and went to the back. It didn’t take him long to come back out with a blue jacket and vest with silver buttons and a and crisp white long sleeved shirt with a navy-blue tie. He gave the outfit to Thorin and ushered him into the fitting room. Even though Bilbo knew that the associate wasn’t going to help Bilbo, he was still happy that he was going to see Thorin in a nice suit.

It took Thorin a while to get dressed but once he came out Bilbo knew he wasn’t going to make it through the weekend. Thorin clad out in a full-on suit with the tie hanging loosely around his neck had Bilbo’s stomach twisting in on itself. The blue pants hugged Thorin’s thighs too well, in fact everything about the suit seemed a bit tight, but Thorin didn’t seem to think it was a problem.

“C’mon Thorin you don’t know how to tie a tie?” Dwalin asked gruffly. Thorin’s cheeks grew a bit red.

“I do. I don’t do it right is all.” Thorin pouted.

“Don’t worry, I’ll help you tie it,” said the associate. He was about to go up to him when Bilbo suddenly cut in front of the worker and grabbed Thorin’s tie and started tying it for him.

“You’re so silly Thorin. You don’t know how to tie a tie properly.” Bilbo muttered. The height difference between Bilbo and Thorin was astonishing. Bilbo was only up to his collarbone if he were a bit taller he could maybe reach his lips. Thorin smelled so good and he almost leaned to his chest. Once Thorin’s tied was properly tied Bilbo stepped aside and said, “Now you look better. Very dashing.”

Bilbo didn’t know what came over him. To block someone who was going near Thorin wasn’t Bilbo’s intent.

_Holy shit. Why the fuck did I just do that? I just stopped an employee from doing his job. Yavanna what the fuck is wrong with me?_

“Well now that Thorin is all taken care of, we’ll start with Bilbo, yes?” Ori said icily to the employee. The associate cleared his throat and looked away.

“Now as I said before. Please find a suit that’s comfortable for my friend over here. Alright?”

The employee hastily went through the store to find a good suit for Bilbo. But Bilbo knew that none of them were going to fit. Once the associate had a handful of different suits and was about to give it to Bilbo, Ori stopped him.

“Seriously? These colors are the ones you chose?”

“The styles I’ve chosen would seem to look very good on him. They’re from the Winter collection.”

“No. This won’t do. That color would make him look tacky and the others look cheap as if they came off the clearance racks. Look, you’ve done your job for Thorin, but it looks like it’s up to me to find what’s good for my friend. So, you can stand behind the register and wait for us to purchase, alright?”

Everyone was shocked at Ori’s response. The associate knew that Ori knew that he didn’t want to help Bilbo because of his weight. They both knew that most of these clothes weren’t made for Bilbo’s body type, but Ori was determined to find one that was going to look and make him feel good. Dwalin and Thorin sat down on the cushioned bench in front of the fitting rooms and waited. Bilbo was following Ori around like a lost duckling.

“Bilbo go sit by Thorin and Dwalin please. I’ll be done getting your suit for you since someone wasn’t helpful.” Ori said loud enough for the associate to hear. Bilbo did as Ori asked and sat next to Thorin who was still wearing the blue suit. It took all of his strength to not stare at Thorin’s flexing thighs that were trapped in tight pants.

“You really think I look okay?” Thorin asked.

_Okay? Just okay? What kind of question is that? You look so fucking good! I just want you to eat me up or I eat you up or we’ll eat each other out! Damn! Fuck, I don’t know how your pants haven’t ripped yet just by you sitting your firm ass down!_

“You look really good Thorin.” Bilbo said instead of what he really wanted to say.

“Okay chit chat later, Bilbo go inside the fitting room and try these on.” Ori said. He shoved Bilbo into the fitting room and closed the curtain.

Bilbo stood there with arms full of good quality fabric and a full-length mirror with his reflection looking back at him. He turned around from the mirror, not wanting to look at himself, not wanting to see the imperfections, the fat… all the fat that would shout and scream at him begging him to look at it… to make himself feel like shit. He tried on the white long sleeved shirt and took a deep breath as he started buttoning it up.

It fit perfectly.

Bilbo honestly couldn’t believe that the shirt fit him. He was tempted to look behind him to see his own reflection, but chose not to.

 Next was a wool grey vest that had gold buttons sewn on them and it somehow magically fit him as well. The maroon pants were next and this was going to be his worst nightmare if they weren’t going to fit over his hips, but the pants hugged his body well. This time Bilbo looked behind the mirror and saw that, yes indeed, the pants made his ass look huge. He had mixed feelings, in a way it made him feel, dare he feel it, sexy? And yet it made him feel self-conscious. Guys weren’t supposed to have huge butts only nice firm ones like Thorin’s. He wore the maroon jacket with gold buttons and the last thing he needed to do was tie his black bow tie. Once that was all set and done he looked hard at himself. He fantasized that the person who was looking straight back at him was a confident person who was proud of his body and didn’t care what anyone thought of him. He wished he could be that person, but he wasn’t. No matter the mixed feelings of feeling a bit sexy, the whispers and laughter of his past still echoed inside his head. Now Bilbo started to look at every single imperfection that was cursed on him.

His ass was too big for a man, his tummy still showed a bit, and his eyeglasses was still the cherry on top to make everything worse.

“You done in there Bilbo?” Dwalin asked.

_No._

He didn’t want to come out. He didn’t want to stand side by side with Thorin who was going to outshine him with his blessed perfection and make him feel like a tub of lard.

_I don’t want to come out. I don’t want to come out. I don’t want to come out. I don’t want to come out._

_I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home._

“Bilbo? I’m coming in okay?” Thorin said.

_No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!_

“No! Don’t come in.” Bilbo shouted. He could see his fingers grasping the curtains firmly, but not moving even though he could see that Thorin was itching to open them.

“Are you still undressed?”

“No.”

“Are you done then?”

“Yes. Just don’t want to come out.” Bilbo whispered.

There was a pause on the other end and Thorin said, “Bilbo, you know you’ll look fine. I mean Ori is damn good at choosing clothes and either way even if he didn’t choose the clothes I know you’d still look good. Okay?”

Bilbo started twiddling his fingers and didn’t say anything. All he wanted to do was change out of the suit and go home.

“I’m going to open the curtain, okay?”

He opened the curtain and looked at Bilbo who was almost, ashamedly, crying. Bilbo could feel him looking at him up and down. Studying him as if he were a frog on the dissecting table.

“I think you look handsome, Bilbo. I truly do.”

Bilbo looked up at him with glassy eyes and with shock saw that Thorin was blushing like mad. If Bilbo could make Thorin blush like that, then he’d start dressing like this all the time.

“Really?” Bilbo whispered.

“Yes.” Thorin whispered back.

“Let me see!” Ori shouted. Thorin stepped to the side so Ori and Dwalin could see Bilbo’s suit. Dwalin nodded his head in approval and Ori couldn’t stop bouncing.

“Yes! This is absolutely perfect! Maroon is definitely your color. AH! And that bow tie is adorable. I’ve really outdone myself. You have to buy it Bilbo! You just have to!” 

Bilbo couldn’t help himself smiling. If everyone seemed to like it then why shouldn’t he?

“Okay. I guess this is the one for me.”

~

Both Bilbo and Thorin bought their suits with a discount. Dwalin told Thorin that Ori practically threatened the associate to give them a huge discount before he told the store director on how rude he was towards his friend; apparently, Ori was close with the store director.

Thorin was so close to punch the employee square in the jaw for ignoring Bilbo, but he was so happy that Bilbo bought the suit that Ori chose for him. How was he going to keep his hands to himself knowing that his ass was so plump and begging to be squeezed and spanked?

_Shit, calm yourself Thorin._

Dwalin and Ori told both Thorin and Bilbo that they were going out to eat together; Dwalin hinting to Thorin that he wants to be left alone.

Thorin and Bilbo decided to head back to the campus, both tired from their shopping day. The sun was setting and the crickets chirped; the air becoming cooler and the sky turning orange like a calm flame. The string lights lit up the town square and the hustle of the town awoke with the night life. They walked to the bus station together with shopping bags in hand. Thorin was a nervous wreck. Bilbo’s hand was so close to his that if he just had the guts to reach out and hold it while they walked to the station together, he would’ve held it so gently and know that Bilbo’s hands would be soft. But it was too late, they both already reached the station together.

“So, what’s your relatives like? I hope they’re not like that horrible woman that talked with you.”

Bilbo chuckled, “No, some of them are not all that bad. The Took family is the most fun while some of the Baggins family is a bit uptight, but there are some that are nice. So, nothing to worry about too much. Just be yourself and you’ll be fine.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

“So, are there any inns that I have to check in?”

“Nonsense! You’re staying with me, remember? My house is pretty large and there’s a lot of guest bedrooms so you can choose whatever you want.”

“Is there a guest bedroom that’s close to yours?” he said with a wolfish grin. He couldn’t help himself but to chuckle from seeing Bilbo’s face flush. _He blushes so easily…damn that’s fucking cute._ The bus arrived and they inserted their bus cards and took their seats. Sitting beside each other, feeling each other’s warmth, and shoulders brushing always made Thorin feel good inside. Everything with Bilbo felt so right to him and he couldn’t stop himself from saying,

“I can’t wait to spend the weekend with you.”

Bilbo blushed but smiled from ear to ear.

“I can’t wait either.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> Thorin's suit:
> 
> https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/db/ea/61/dbea61cb05aa03f77e15ddd5c38702c6--wedding-suits-blue-men-suits-wedding.jpg
> 
> Bilbo's suit:
> 
> http://stylemann.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Maroon-Suit-2-650x650.jpg
> 
> PS: bitchykanon.tumblr.com (my tumblr in case you want to talk about anything <3)
> 
> PS: Some of you who have been with this story from the beginning knew that it was present tense before and suddenly switched to past tense. I changed the tenses because holy shit present tense is super hard! So I rewrote everything in past tense so the words would flow easier, plus to cut some slack on myself haha.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I hope everyone's September has been good and filled with happiness. It makes me so happy that I'm updating quicker than usual. School has been hectic, I won't lie, but I've organized myself and things in life are going smoothly. My journey of self-love and self-healing is still progressing and I'm feeling better than ever!
> 
> As always it thrills me to see the heart warming comments that you guys leave for me and the kudos rose to a number that I didn't think it was possible to reach. You are all my kerosene and light the fire within me that I feel, at times, have dimmed but all of you (and my close friends) push me to become better. I can't say anything else but thank you! 
> 
> So without further ado, here is Chapter 15!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> PS: IT'S ALMOST HALLOWEEN WHICH IS THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR! I cannot wait to dress up and get some delicious candy and watch Hocus Pocus over and over again! Do you guys celebrate Halloween? If you do, who are you going to be this year? :D

“So how uptight are they?” Thorin asked.

Scattered notes filled with Bilbo’s brail-like curled writing along with Thorin’s heavy inked Khuzdul alphabet and phrases laid on top of the table. They were both in their usual corner inside the library; instead of Bilbo being the tutor it was Thorin’s turn to tutor Bilbo in his Khuzdul.

“Pretty tight, I’m afraid. Like I’ve told you before, the Baggins’ are the most uptight while the Took side is more fun. But unfortunately, not a lot of the Took family will be there. Majority of them will be Baggins’.” Bilbo sighed. He honestly didn’t want to go to the wedding, knowing all those snobs would be there looking at how fat he’d gotten. He wasn’t ready to hear the lectures of how he should exercise more or go through a special diet. It’s not like he doesn’t exercise at all. He walked almost every day and on occasion he helped the librarian lift some new book packages on the shelves; it may not be lifting weights or running through a treadmill at the gym, but at least it was something. And honestly, he was tired of special diets. He’d tried them in high school when Smaug was telling him to lose weight. They had no flavoring at all from their small portioned packages and some of them made him feel a bit sick.

But he knew that Bag End was at stake. Lobelia always wanted Bag End all to her greedy self, which was why she did her best to marry within the family to see if she could take it. Bilbo reminded himself that he would need to see the family attorney to double check if Lobelia would find a loophole to take away his home.

“Well it’s a good thing that I’m going with you this weekend, huh? So, you won’t have to face those horrible people yourself.” Thorin winked which caused Bilbo to blush.

“Thanks. I hope they won’t be too…uptight when they see you.” Bilbo whispered. Not only did he worry about his insecurities sky rocketing once he headed back home, he worried deeply for Thorin. He knew that once the Baggins’ would see Thorin’s hair they would surely gossip. They were, well…uptight. Uptight was the most fitting word to describe the Baggins’, all except for his grandmother. He loved both grandmama Baggins and grandmama Took. Both grandmothers were, surprisingly, close the more Bilbo thought about it.

“It’s nothing that I can’t handle. I’ve dealt with my fair share of dreadful family reunions.” Thorin remembered times where he had to scrape up his sibling’s mistakes and take the blame for it because what are big brothers for? Or the time Dwalin and him rammed his grandfather’s car into a ditch simply to get away from his annoying siblings. Facing some snobs at a wedding should be a breeze.

“Thorin, did I write this correctly?” Thorin peered over to see what Bilbo had written.

“No. You drew an extra line. There needs to be two. Here I’ll show you.” Thorin scooted his chair closer to Bilbo. He gently took Bilbo’s pen and had to withhold the shudder than ran across his spine. He crossed off the incorrect Khuzdul character and wrote it properly. He could feel Bilbo’s cheek brushing his forearm.

_Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm._

“Ah. I see,” Bilbo carefully rewrote the character over and over again till it was neat and perfect, “Is this better?”

He showed it to Thorin who hummed in approval.

“If you keep this up you may be fine going to Erebor without a problem.”

“Really?” Bilbo asked with hope. There it was, the sparkle in his eyes that made Thorin’s heart explode. “I would love to see your country. What’s it like?”

Thorin leaned back in his chair and thinks. Erebor is hard to describe, it’s…perfect. It’s home.

“Erebor is mostly well-known to be mountainous. The most famous one is called The Lonely Mountain.”

“The Lonely Mountain.” Bilbo whispered.

“It stands 3,500 meters tall. It was said that many kings have lived inside the mountain with their people and lived well. Their main trade were gems and gold because Ereboreans at the time, and some still are today, were known to be the best miners in the world.”

Thorin looked at Bilbo who gave his utmost attention with his eyes telling him to keep talking. In some way, it unnerved Thorin to have this much attention. He usually liked to stay in the background as much as he could, always trying to avoid the spotlight (unlike his siblings). Thorin cleared his throat and continued.

“Erebor still has a monarch ruling with a king and queen and a prince. It’s mostly cold, except of course in the summer which is when most of the festivals are held. It has its fair share of cities and country-side. Of course, the main language is Khuzdul but the second language is English. Uhm let’s see…we’re known to be industrial with our inventions and architecture. We’re always building something, be it buildings or skyscrapers or even houses that can be livable on the mountains. Erebor at night is the best though. All the stars are out and the night sky is always clear. On a special day, the entire country would turn off their lights and watch the stars. It’s so clear that you could sometimes see the Milky Way at night and during winter the Northern Lights light up the skies.”

Thorin then realized that he was babbling and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“I rambled, my bad.”

Bilbo with starry eyes was enraptured by his talk of his home.

“No. I love it when you talk. I need to learn more Khuzdul so I can become an expert and visit Erebor myself. I’d love to see the Northern Lights.” Bilbo said with a smile.

_I’d take you anytime you want, Bilbo._

~

Beep, beep! Beep, beep! Beep, beep!

_Why’s my alarm sounding? And why did I put it so early?_

Bilbo smashed his alarm clock to silence it. He sloppily searched for his glasses on his nightstand and read the time.

_Bloody hell… 6:30am? Really? Why the fuck did I do that?_

He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and checked his calendar on top of his desk. A big red mark circled around Saturday…which was today.

“Oh…it’s only Saturday.” He tossed his glasses back on the nightstand and plopped right back to bed. Sleep almost dragged him till he remembered why he circled this specific Saturday.

“SWEET YAVANNA IT’S FUCKING SATURDAY!” He fell out of his bed with a loud thud. He grabbed his glasses from the nightstand and put them on his face which fell crooked. He opened his closet and saw only a few of his clothes neatly hung up. A note was left on the inside of the closet door.

_Bilbo. I chose the most suiting outfits for your weekend trip. They’re all folded in a bag in the left corner and remember that your brown suitcase is on top. -Ori_

_PS: I left a little surprise inside the case. ;)_

Bilbo was so fortunate to have Ori, he must’ve known that he would’ve struggled with picking an outfit for the weekend. But he does wonder when Ori had the time to do all of this for him.

_I’ll have to thank him later._

He managed to find his suitcase and opened the faded gold locks and lifted the suitcase. He slammed the case shut with a hot face once he saw a package of condoms and lube inside.

_Never mind…. I’ll have to kill him later._

He took a deep breath and shoved all his clothes that was inside from the bag inside his case. He didn’t need any hygiene essentials knowing that all that he left inside the house was still going to be there. He changed out of his pajamas and randomly chose a plain grey shirt and worn out jeans. He checked himself in the mirror, and yes, he should wear his cardigan or else Thorin was going to see those chubby arms of his.

“Shit! Almost forgot about you.” Bilbo said as he was grabbing a cardigan. He got his suit that was still sealed inside the garment cover. He was still in disbelief that he has one outfit that made him feel good. If that’s what it felt like to feel good in an outfit, then he would wear clothes like the one Ori had chosen for him all the time.

Bilbo opened his desk drawer and took his wallet and keys, then made his way out with his suitcase in hand. Thorin was going to meet him at the bus stop.

~

Thorin was already waiting for Bilbo once he arrived at the station. Bilbo was relieved when he saw that Thorin was dressed just as casually as he was. He carried his suit with one hand and his large navy blue rolling suitcase with the other.

“I’m sorry I was almost late! I kind of forgot that today was the day we were supposed to leave.”

“It’s alright. We made it anyway.” Thorin motioned to Bilbo to look at the bus that was coming near. The smell of diesel wafted the air and the screeching halt of the bus stopped in front of the young men.

“After you.” Thorin winked.

“Thank you, kind sir.” Bilbo faked a courtesy. Inside the bus was cold as ice and Bilbo was thankful that he was wearing a cardigan. The bus driver didn’t greet them as they entered the bus. He looked tired with his heavy dark circled eyes, already tired from the long day ahead of him. Bilbo reminded himself to tip the driver if he had spare notes in his wallet. There were only a few people inside the bus. One was way in the back slouching with his hoody up and covering his eyes. There was a mother with her two children up at the front. With her morning coffee in hand and two children trying to sit on one seat nestled together.

They both took their seats and the driver took off.

“Are we getting there by bus?”

“No. We have to go to the train station and ride the train. From then on we’ll be in Hobbiton Station and my friend will be picking us up from there.”

“What friend?”

“Hamfast. He’s been my closest friend since I was a kid.”

Good ol’ Hamfast had never let Bilbo down. He’d been with him through thick and thin when he broke up with Smaug. He never judged him and he always made him feel better by being a good listener. Bilbo almost thought that he might have had a slight crush on him, but he could only see him as a close friend and nothing more.

“By train? I thought you lived close to the school like the rest of us.”

“Haha, no. I live in the countryside so I had to leave my house early to get to school on time when we were in high school.”

“That must’ve sucked. You always looked so awake and happy all the time in school.”

“I will admit it did fucking suck, but I saw the sunrise every day and I had a strong cup of tea to wake me up. So, it wasn’t all bad.”

“You have a filthy mouth Bilbo Baggins.” Thorin rumbled. Bilbo was lucky enough that inside the bus was still dimmed or else Thorin would’ve seen his red hot cheeks.

~

The bus ride was surprisingly quick and they made it to the train station on time. Bilbo was thankful that he found a few notes in his wallet and gave it to the bus driver.

“Get yourself a strong coffee, alright?” The bus driver gave a soft smile and whispered his thanks. They grabbed their baggage’s and headed towards the main train station. The main train station was huge but inside only a handful of people were working or waiting for their train to arrive. Every pillar was bronze. The floor was the color of peach marble and the colorful mosaic skylight hung above railroad tracks. They both went to the ticket stand and the vendor printed out their tickets. The vendor directed them to wait on platform 11.

“I always still hope that there would be platform 9 ¾ waiting for me.” Bilbo said.

“Platform nine and three what?”

Bilbo almost dropped his suitcase and was stood dumbstruck.

“Are you serious? 9 ¾…from Harry Potter.”

“I’ve heard of Harry Potter just haven’t read the books or watched any of the movies.” Bilbo stood there blinking at him with a blank face.

“Well that is going to have to change once we get to my house. You sir, are going to watch every single Potter film and that’s that! I won’t take no for an answer.”

Thorin chuckled, “Alright Master Baggins, have it your way.”

It was then that they both sat down on a copper bench and waited for their train to arrive. Throughout this time, Bilbo began to explain to Thorin about the different houses from the wizarding world and all his theories about the books.

“So, what house would I be in?” Thorin asked with amusement. Bilbo looked at him and thought for a moment.

_He’s gentle and loyal to his friends and most likely his family. Oh and he’s so smart too and cunning. And definitely handsome…so fucking handsome. But…he’s brave, competitive, and has amazing leadership._

“Gryffindor. Yeah, most definitely Gryffindor.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“Yes, I would like to say it is…. but Hufflepuff is so much better.” Bilbo smirked.

“Ha! I’m assuming it’s cause you’re a Hufflepuff?”

Bilbo nodded. He couldn’t wait to get home and have a Harry Potter marathon with Thorin. It was basically his most perfect date. But then the sinking feeling of knowing that it was never going to be a date sank in Bilbo’s head. _Why am I getting ahead of myself? Why am I allowing myself to indulge in this unhealthy fantasy that will only hurt me in the end?_

“I want to be in Hufflepuff then.” Thorin said suddenly.

“Wait, what? Why? Gryffindors are practically the chosen house and everyone likes them. They’re the center of the whole saga!”

“Well… if Hogwarts was a real place and we were both in that school then I wouldn’t see you as often, would I? Nah, I’d rather be a Hufflepuff so I can stay with you.”

_You blundering idiot… you are making this so difficult for me. Ha! You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you? Right? RIGHT?! Dammit why do you have to be absolutely fucking perfect?_

“Hahaha, you’re just saying that. Don’t joke like that.” Bilbo chuckled a bit bitterly.

“My jokes are terrible, so I’m very serious.” Thorin said looking at Bilbo straight in the eye. It made Bilbo nervous every time those ocean blue eyes looked right through him. He felt so exposed and his stomach twisted in knots.

The chugging of the train alerted both young men that their train had arrived. The screech of the train halted to a stop and the conductor shouted, “ALL ABOARD!” Nobody was getting off the train because it was way too early in the morning to go anywhere. The only passengers would be Thorin and Bilbo. They grabbed their luggage’s and walked up the tiny steps into their coach. All the seats were a deep mahogany and they were all red cushioned. Bilbo and Thorin took their seats.

“This looks pretty fancy.”

“They remodeled the whole coach it seems like. It certainly didn’t look like this when I graduated.”

The conductor asked for their tickets and they both gave it to him. He grabbed a hole puncher and gave them back their tickets.

“How long is the train ride going to be?”

“I’d say about a good two hours or so.” Bilbo said.

“Mahal…and you woke up two hours early just to go to school? I would’ve just been homeschooled.”

“I was homeschooled during middle school.”

“Really? I didn’t know that.”

“Yeah well it’s not important. What do you want to do first when we reach the Shire?”

“I don’t know. Show me anything you’d like.” Thorin smiled.

“Well we could stop by the Prancing Pony. Hamfast and I would always hangout there.”

Thorin did his best to hide the anger bubbling inside him. He believed when Bilbo said that they were nothing but friends, but how close were they? Were they too close?

_Am I going to be a third wheel when we get there?_

~

The train ride was peaceful. The train horn from time to time would blare and the calming lullaby of the clangs of the wheels hitting the railroad tracks soothed Bilbo. He didn’t realize how much he’d missed the sounds of the train from going home to school and vice versa. The sun was shining and he knew that they were getting closer to the Shire. He could see the rolling green hills as if they were calm ocean waves. He couldn’t wait to see his home, his garden, the wildflowers with their sweet scent, and to see his parents again.

Bilbo was thinking over and over on how he could entertain Thorin while staying the weekend. Harry Potter movies could only last so long before Thorin would probably get bored of it. And there weren’t many things to do in the Shire. Sure, there were a few shops here and there and even some cafes, but nothing extravagant like in the city. Thorin was nodding to sleep and before Bilbo could even react his head landed on his shoulder.

Bilbo tensed up immediately. He wasn’t sure if he should gently nudge Thorin to wake up so he wouldn’t embarrass himself when he saw that he leaned over to Bilbo, but the thing was that he didn’t want to wake him up. This felt nice. It felt strangely intimate. It felt extremely nerve wrecking!

_Oh, sweet Eru, I should wake him up!_

“Thorin.” Bilbo whispered. Thorin grunted and mumbled something in his sleep. His face scooted closer to Bilbo’s neck.

_Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Please not there!_

His breath was warm and moist. He was mumbling in his sleep and his soft voice vibrated through Bilbo causing him to have the most uncomfortable boner. Bilbo covered the tent in his pants and his mind was scrambling to think of something.

_If I wake him up now what the hell am I going to do with this?_

He looked outside the window and saw the cattle grazing and a tall billboard that said HOBBITON STATION ONLY 8 MILES AHEAD!

“Shit. We’re getting close to the Shire,” Bilbo whispered to himself, “I have to wake him up now.”

He looked at Thorin and didn’t have the heart to wake him up. His hair smelled like earth and musk, just what Bilbo liked. He fought rolling his eyes because of course Thorin smelled so perfect. Of course, he just had to sleep on his shoulder like they were both in some cliché romcom. He twiddled his fingers quickly because the Shire was getting closer and closer with each passing green grove. He hated to admit that he loved the feeling of his weight against him. Bilbo indulged himself to fantasize that Thorin’s muscled weight on top of him in bed would be nice. A throb from his prick signaled him to stop these naughty fantasies because it certainly wasn’t helping trying to calm down his boner.

_Horrible things. Think of horrible things. Uhm. Math. My relatives. Lobelia with her shitty looking hats. Smaug. Oh! That did the trick._

With his boner finally gone this was the perfect time to wake him up. He was about to nudge him when he looked at Thorin’s face. He realized that he was never this close to Thorin’s face at all. He knew the blue orbs that were pierce, cold, and haunting yet gentle and warm were hidden in the blanket of his lids. His dark beard neatly trimmed, his strong nose gently breathing, and his long dark mane cascading down his shoulders. He was so fucking handsome that Bilbo didn’t want to wake him up. Thorin looked so peaceful when he was sleeping but they were about to reach Bilbo’s hometown soon so he had to wake him up.

Bilbo nudged him softly and waited. Nothing. Bilbo poked him on his face this time and the only response that he got was a grumble and his face nuzzling deeper towards his neck.

_Fuck that feels really nice but this ends now._

“Thorin, wake up!” he shook him and this time Thorin woke up with a jolt.

“W-What? What happened? Did I pass that damn English test?!” He looked around and found that he was inside a train with Bilbo and not inside Professor Thranduil’s classroom with a 500-paged final essay.

Bilbo busted out laughing. His stomach pinched and the tears were slowly seeping through his eyes from laughing too hard while Thorin pouted with amusement.

“I’m sorry, I’m not laughing at you. I just didn’t expect you to wake up like that.” He wiped the tears from his eyes and erupted in giggles every so often. Bilbo stopped chuckling when he saw Thorin’s face staring at him.

“W-What are you looking at?” Bilbo asked nervously.

“You know I don’t think I’ve ever heard you laugh like that before… it’s nice.” Thorin smiled warmly. The sun was up and this time, Bilbo didn’t have the shadows to hide his blush. It was Thorin’s turn to chuckle.

“If I knew complimenting you would fluster you so easily, I’d do it all the time.”

Bilbo huffed and whispered, “You’re such an idiot.” His head leaned against the window that was warmed from the morning sunshine. Bilbo recognized a grand oak tree that had been rooted to the ground before he was born and he smiled to himself. He was almost home.

~

“HOBBITON STATION! HOBBITON STATION!” the conductor shouted. Bilbo and Thorin grabbed their belongings and headed out to the station. It was older than the train station in the city. The skylight above the railroad tracks had vines weaving their ways on the glass. An old big golden clock rusted down from the weather hung from the ceiling. The smell of grass and flowers hit Thorin’s nose. Did Bilbo’s home always smell like this? If it did, how long did it take him to get used to the smell of the city? All those fumes from the cars, the diesel buses, and the hot pavement. For Thorin, it took him almost a year to get used to the city smells. Erebor’s air was so fresh from the mountains that when he moved to live in the city his head was light and spinning.

“Do you have everything?” Bilbo asked. Thorin nodded and followed Bilbo who looked so eager to be back home. And who could blame him? Thorin had his days of feeling homesick. He missed his mountains so much.

“You know, I wish you would’ve stayed away throughout the trip.”

“Oh? Miss me when I’m awake?” Thorin said with a sly grin.

“Stop that,” Bilbo playfully smacked his shoulder, “no I wished you could’ve seen the Blue Mountains.”

“Y-You have mountains in the Shire?”

“No. They’re miles away from the Shire, but maybe if we find time we can visit them if you– “

“Yes,” Thorin exclaimed and realized how quick he agreed to his offer, he cleared his throat, “I mean yes, I would like to see them.”

Bilbo held his laugh and they made their way outside of the station. They were both greeted by a young man with red curly hair and red cheeks. He was tall and big boned with a full tooth smile.

“Hamfast!” Bilbo shouted. He ran up to him and gave him a large and long hug.

“Long time no see Bilbo.” Hamfast said. Thorin didn’t greet him, he just stared at Hamfast coldly.

_Mahal have mercy on me, this is going to be one long weekend._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Thank you again! <3
> 
> PS: bitchykanon.tumblr.com (my tumblr in case you want to talk about anything <3)
> 
> PS: Thanks to @WikdSushi for giving me the inspiration about Thorin's hair. You already know that his relatives are gonna have a riot when they see his glorious mane. ;)


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR!! How was everyone's holidays? Mine was alright, not too shabby. Haha, I'm back! Let me tell you, this chapter gave me the biggest headache of all time, which is why it took longer than my usual two month update! I had to scrap countless of rough drafts on how to workout this chapter to make it flow and to make it a bit longer than usual. But now that I finally got it down and have this updated for all of you, I hope that you enjoy the long awaited Chapter 16.
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> PS: OH MY GOODNESS ALL THE KUDOS! THANK YOU EVERYONE!!

You’re usually supposed to be happy for the people you care about. You’re supposed to feel good when they feel good. You’re supposed to feel happy when they see their best friend that is, yes, hugging them for way too long for Thorin’s taste. Thorin knew that he was supposed to be happy and he tried to swallow the lump of jealously down his throat, but it all rose up again when Bilbo’s best friend, Hamfast, reached for Thorin’s hand for a handshake. He grasped his hand and squeezed hard and smiled tightly. Hamfast’s eyes squinted a bit but it vanished quickly and he returned Thorin with a genuine smile. 

“Oh! You brought your beetle! You still a nasty driver?” Bilbo jested.

“Oi! I ain’t no nasty driver. It’s you the one who's terrible at driving. Remember? You almost ran into old Bracegirdle's fence. It's you that we need to watch out for.” Hamfast put away their luggage, even though Thorin persistently offered that he can load them all himself, and started to make their way to Bilbo's hometown.

Throughout the drive they continued with their light banter and Thorin was getting sick of it. He tuned them both out from looking outside of his window. 

Green.

That was pretty much all Thorin could sum up when he saw the Shire. Everything was a lush and healthy green and there were so many hills. His thoughts wandered back to how on earth Bilbo managed to cope with living in the city. Bilbo lived inside the country, where the air was always fresh and the sky was always bright. He could already tell that here in the Shire the nights would be quiet and the only thing that anyone would hear would be the field crickets chirping; whereas in the city the hustle and bustle of the city with their sirens blaring from the ambulances and police cars and the screeching of buses stopping at their routes would fill the city air. There were times where Thorin considered himself a city slicker, so he blended in with the city well, but his true home would always be in the mountains. He’d wondered if Bilbo would be willing to take him to the mountains that he was talking about. He missed the mountains from home so much that maybe seeing other mountains may help ease his home sickness. He heard Bilbo laughing at one of Hamfast's jokes and it was nice. He loved hearing him laugh, but he would've preferred if he was the one that made Bilbo laugh and not the driver.

Have mercy, Hamfast sure was a chatterbox. He wouldn't shut up about his gardens or the gardens that he'd done for the people in the Shire. Or how he wanted to start a business that dealt with gardening or some bullshit like that. Thorin's temples were starting to throb. 

_Ugh! Please stop. Please shut the fuck up._  Thorin fought rolling his eyes to the back of his head. Was this person always this light-hearted? Always so cheerful? Always so…smiley? It wasn't till Thorin realized that Bilbo was talking to him.

"Thorin?"

"Hm? You're talking to me?" Thorin grumbled. Bilbo's brows furrowed. Thorin didn't mean to sound bitter, but he couldn't help but mope just a little. He knew that he should let Bilbo catch up with his best friend, after all Hamfast had been there for Bilbo the longest so Thorin knew that he didn't really have a say in anything. But he couldn't help how he felt. 

"Well, Hamfast and I were wondering if you wanted to go to the Prancing Pony for lunch, does that sound alright with you?" Bilbo asked carefully. 

"It's alright with me. It's your hometown, so you can do whatever you want."

~

The ride to the Shire was to say the least a bit awkward. Bilbo thought it was going to be amazing coming back home and he was so sure that Thorin was genuinely excited to see it all; but ever since Hamfast had driven them out of the station Thorin's mood had changed dramatically. He wasn't himself that's for sure and Bilbo couldn't tell what was wrong. Had he done something to upset him? Was he frustrated that he didn't wake him up when they passed the Blue Mountains? Maybe Thorin was just feeling grumpy because he hadn't eaten anything.

The Prancing Pony was still the same with its rustic cottage aesthetic and inside was no different. The main desk where the greeters stood was wooden and showed its age. Pictures of the people in the Shire hung on the walls. The pictures carried fond memories of people passed out drunk and people singing on top of the tables and some couples snuggling side by side with a tankard in their hands. There were many long wooden tables inside the pub with long benches to accommodate it. A fireplace in the back of the restaurant was filled with dozens of oil paintings of landscapes. A long table bar with many wooden tall stools and shiny liquor bottles that glistened in the sun. A few booths were by the windows and upstairs led to many rooms for travelers. Bilbo explained to Thorin that it's not only a pub but a bed and breakfast inn. 

"Do you remember Hamfast? When you and I hid in Mrs. Kanker's favorite room so we wouldn't have to go to Sunday school?"

"Aye, I do. She was such a rat that ol' bat. I don't know why we'd always went inside that room when we knew she was gonna squeal on us."

"If I remember correctly it was because she stashed the best biscuits in there."

A portly jolly looking man came from the kitchens with three menus in his hand.

"Well bless me. If my eyes aren't deceiving me it's little Bilbo. How are you lad? It's been a long time since I've seen you. You aren't here to take any of Mrs. Kanker's biscuits, are you?" 

Bilbo's ear tips were red and giggled, "Hello, Mr. Kanker. No, but if she has any can you take some for me, please?" He pouted his lips and gave him his best puppy eyes.  

"Those puppy eyes ain't gonna work on me. You've done that trick since you were a little fauntling. But anywho, come over I'll set you up with the best table." Mr. Kanker guided them towards one of the booths by the window. The view was fetching and it really was like how Bilbo remembered it. The multicolored flower bushes and bumblebees buzzing. The view of the Shire and everyone's homes and even the small newly painted white church was in site. He could picture him and Hamfast sneaking out the window from the church and ran all the way here. Nothing had changed at all whatsoever and it comforted him.

"And who's your friend boys? Never seen him before." Mr. Kanker said.

"My name's Thorin. Thorin Durin. Pleased to meet you." Thorin said extending his hand.

"Your accent is strong lad. Where are you from?"

"Erebor." 

"A fine country. My wife and I have always wanted to go. Do you know what you lads want?"

"We'll have our usual," said Hamfast. Hamfast handed him the menus, but Thorin was still looking over on what he wanted. Bilbo knew that something was up with Thorin, so hopefully a good meal would lighten his mood a bit. Bilbo leaned over the table and said, "I would definitely recommend this one. It's one of my favorites." Thorin looked up at Bilbo and smiled softly. His eyes were deep as the ocean and his smile was bright. Yes, this was the Thorin that Bilbo wanted. The one that smiled sweetly, the one where his eyes were warm instead of cold, and where his laugh was genuine. Thorin went closer to Bilbo's face and suddenly he felt warm all over. He did his best to control the shudder that ran down through his body, but failed tremendously. 

"If you insist Bilbo." Thorin said. 

Mr. Kanker gathered their orders and headed to the kitchen. 

"The leaves will be changing soon, I reckon." Hamfast said. 

"Oh yes, it is almost autumn. Afraid I'll miss the colors of the leaves." Bilbo said. 

"Aye. They certainly are beautiful when autumn comes. I must say though, the old tree by your house is the prettiest." 

Bilbo sighed and remembered back when he was small and how he would climb the oak tree. Its strong limbs never faltering when he would bounce on it trying to make the colorful leaves fall. His father would always scold him because he would have to rake the whole yard again. His mother would encourage him to jump on top of the pile of leaves that his father had just raked and spread it all over the yard.

_Honestly Bungo. The leaves are beautiful!_ _Let's add_ _some spice into the front yard! That's it Bilbo, jump!_

"Yes. I would definitely have to agree with you Hamfast." Bilbo said.

Thorin was quiet and it didn't go unnoticed with Bilbo.  _Maybe he feels left out?_

"Thorin! When we get back home, I insist that we should watch Harry Potter." He smiled when Thorin chuckled.

"I'd like that." Thorin said with a grin. Mr. Kanker brought their food in a jiff. Hamfast and Bilbo had their order of mashed potatoes smothered in butter and chives, buttery home baked biscuits with a side of cinnamon butter, two large cold chicken sandwiches stuffed with the good fixings, and seed cakes. Thorin had huge helpings of gooey mac and cheese, two mutton minced pies, mixed vegetables seasoned in herbs and salt, and a fried apple tart that had a crystalline glaze of sugar.

Bilbo and Thorin both ate with enthusiasm. Bilbo had almost forgotten how good the food was at the pub and he smiled to himself when he saw that Thorin was eating with a gusto. The conversation was light and easy even though it was mostly between Hamfast and Bilbo, but Bilbo could tell that Thorin was listening intently. 

"Yes, I remember when we did that. We were only fauntlings back then, it's no wonder the Sackville's hated us." Hamfast giggled finishing up his seed cake.

"Mr. Kanker said that word, 'fauntling'. What does that mean?" Thorin asked.

"In the Shire it's a slang that the folks here use for the word kid or child. Kind of like how you told me in Erebor they say pebbles." Bilbo said. 

"I actually can't believe you remembered that I told you that bit." Thorin said leaning in closer to Bilbo.

"I-I... well it's just that I like listening...to you," Bilbo could feel his face turning red, "Mr. Kanker, check please!" 

_Dear_ _Yavanna_ _, please hurry up with that check before I make myself even look more like a damn fool._

~

Once they were all done with lunch, Mr. Kanker gave Thorin and Bilbo two doggy bags for dinner. Bilbo pleaded to Mr. Kanker with those puppy eyes of his to see if he can snatch some of his wife's biscuits. But he shooed Bilbo away. Thorin wanted to ask how Mr. Kanker had a firm fist when it came down to Bilbo's puppy eyes. If Bilbo so much as ever pouted his lips he would've turned into a puddle and given him whatever he wanted, but he didn't ask because why would he refuse any request from Bilbo? The lunch had been delicious and Thorin was too full and warm from the gleaming sun to even care about Hamfast's ramblings about more gardening or the girl he'd been trying to ask out for over two years. 

They'd passed many houses each having lovely vegetable gardens or flower bushes. Bed sheets were hanging from clothes lines clipped with laundry hooks. He saw some kids running and playing and neighbors relaxing in rocking chairs. Everything was so peaceful and he wondered why Bilbo ever left the country. They drove up a hill that was sprinkled with small wild flowers. Hamfast put his car on park and pulled the emergency break. 

"Welcome home Bilbo." Hamfast said with a big smile. All of them got out of the car and grabbed their luggage from the trunk. Thorin had to admit that Bilbo's home was odd looking. On top of the roof wasn't shingles but grass and the large oak tree that Hamfast spoke of during lunch. In a strange way the home looked as if it was underground. Hamfast opened the wooden gate for both boys and closed it.

"Well, I best be heading back home. Mum's ill again and she'll nag my ear off if I don't help her in the gardens today."

"Is she alright? Should I bring anything for her?" Bilbo asked.

"Oh, don't you worry Mr. Bilbo. She's a tough cookie. Just a bit of a nasty cold she got from a week ago." 

Hamfast went back inside his beetle and waved to them as he drove off.

"Well... this is my home." Bilbo said. In front of Bilbo's home was a magnificent vegetable garden that had potatoes and all kinds of squash. A sturdy bench was at the bottom of the stairs that was surrounded by flower bushes and flower pots. They both went up the stairs that was somewhat covered with grass and a bit of moss. Closer to the front door were more green bushes and colorful flowers in bushes and some were inside pots. The door was a round emerald green that was outlined with bricks with a golden doorknob that was speckled with age smack dab in the middle. 

Bilbo opened the door and Thorin was greeted with the smell of hearth and earth. He expected the house to be small and cramped, but it was spacious with wooden beamed arches and long hallways. An eight-legged chandelier was hung above the entrance of the doorway. To the left was what would probably be considered a breakfast nook with a fireplace and two separate pictures of a man and woman. Even further down was the kitchen, but Thorin couldn't tell if it was big or small, but assuming how extensive the house was he wouldn't doubt if the kitchen was large. 

"I'll show you to your room, yeah?"

Bilbo's house was like a maze and he wondered if he was going to get lost for finding the bathroom. 

"This is going to sound really stupid, but is your home truly underground?"

"Oh yes, it is. My dad built this house for my mom and I don't know what gave him the idea to make it underground, but it's cozy. It's nice and it's not like how most people envisioned when they first see it."

"How do they usually see it as?"

"A hole in the ground that's wet or filled with worms and oozy smells. But as you can see it's quite the opposite. My father wanted to put a lot of windows so there'll be sunshine throughout the rooms."

Bilbo led him to his room which was furnished with plain décor. A simple nightstand with a lamp and alarm clock. A window with light olive-green curtains and a queen bed that was in matching olive-green comforter and fluffy pillow sheets. 

"My room is right in front of yours and the bathroom is on your right down the hall. Just make yourself feel at home."

~

Everything was settled. Bilbo had everything unpacked and organized. He hid the condoms and lube that Ori gave him inside his night drawer with a heated face. 

_Now what?_ _Oh,_ _dear_ _Yavanna_ _what the fuck now? Should we watch Harry Potter now? Or save it for later? I'd never thought I'd feel this awkward in my own home!_

Bilbo did what any sensible 'hobbit' would've done in a situation like this which was to bake. He went straight to the kitchen and rummaged through the pantry. He mindlessly grabbed whatever ingredients he could find and laid it all out on the countertop. Eggs, butter, flour, sugar, vanilla extract, baking soda, chocolate chips. "Guess I'm making cookies." Bilbo mumbled. 

It didn't take long for him to make the batter because he'd baked hundreds of cookies with his mother before so it was almost second nature. The cookies were lined up and he placed them inside the oven. He reached for his mother's timer that was cutely shaped like a cow and twisting the knob for fifteen minutes. 

Bilbo pulled out his chair from the kitchen table and began to wait for the cookies. The smell of home baked cookies spread through the halls of Bag End. It was quiet and he felt as if he should turn on the telly to have some background noise, but he found himself to be a bit lazy to grab the remote inside the cupboard. A memory rushed through his mind. Lobelia causing a scene in Bilbo's campus. Shouting at him how Bag End should've belonged to her and her future husband. Who knows what she'd been plotting as soon as she left. He worried that she had found a way to make the house officially hers. 

He could envision the horror now. The walls would be covered in over the top wallpapers. The furniture would be thrown out and placed with modern sleeked décor. The rugs would be torn to pieces and place with fluffy faux fur rugs. She'd been dying to paint the green door into a blood orange. The only thing she'd keep would be his mother's silverware or just about anything that belonged to his mother. She was always envious of his mother's belongings. 

He unlocked his phone number and dialed the family attorney's number.

"Bolger's attorney's office. This is Shelly speaking; how may I help you?"

"Hey Shelly, it's Bilbo. I need to talk to Fred if he's in for the day."

"Oh, hello Bilbo. It's been such a long time since I've heard your lovely voice, how are you?"

"I'm alright. I'm here for the weekend, but is Fred there?"

"I'm sorry sugar cube, but Fred isn't here for the day. I can leave him a message if you'd like."

"Yes please. Tell him when he finds time to call me tomorrow."

The cookies were baked through and were laid out in front of the window to cool off. Thorin came out of his room looking like as if he'd woken up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take a short nap, but everything felt so comfortable that I closed my eyes for a minute and woke up half an hour later."

"It's no problem. I told you to make yourself at home and I’m glad that you find your room comfortable. My mum would've been very pleased."

Thorin saw the cookies and was about to reach them, but Bilbo lightly tapped his hand while shooing him away. "You have to wait till their cool."

"But I want them now." Thorin smiled. 

"Later. Instead you can help me get some tea from the garden out back."

"You have a backyard?"

"Well not really, it's more like on top of the house I should say. My mum made a tiny tea garden near the oak tree. I went through the pantry and there's not a lot of tea so we'll need to restock."

"And then cookies?"

"Yes Thorin and then cookies."

Bilbo opened a small drawer from the kitchen and pulled out two clippers. 

Outside on top of Bilbo's grassy roof was the small tea garden that was well taken care of.

"Hamfast has been taking care of the gardens. I can tell cause he always leaves a signature," Bilbo pointed to a small white stone near a tea plant, "He always leaves a small white stone. I guess it's his way of marking? Probably? I'm not sure. But I should make him or get him something for keeping up with the house and its gardens."

Bilbo explained to Thorin which leaves to cut and which leaves to leave alone. For a while there was only the sound of snipping. Sometimes Bilbo would leave little facts about the tea garden every now and then, but the majority of the time was in silence. It wasn't awkward at all, it was quite comfortable. For Bilbo it was nice. He liked that he didn't always have to find a way to keep up a conversation and he'd always had to remind himself that Thorin wasn't much of a talker anyways, so he must be enjoying not talking. 

With their knees all dirtied up from the soil and the smell of tea in their hair, Bilbo decided that they've gathered enough tea and started to head back down inside his home. He placed the tea leaves near a sunny window to let them dry. The cookies were cooled down and already Thorin had taken four chocolate chip cookies to himself. 

Since it was autumn, the night came by fast. The stars were out and the moon was bright and fat. They both fixed up salty snacks and more chocolate chip cookies. Their relaxed silence was soon broken by Thorin. 

"Can we watch Harry Potter now?" 

"Yeah. I'd like that." 

Bilbo went to his room and rummaged through his shelves to find his Harry Potter DVDs. 

"Damn. Where the hell is it?" 

He searched under his bed, inside his closet, inside his drawers that was filled with more DVDs and loose-leaf papers. He went out and checked the office and scoured its shelves and drawers. He finally stopped by the mini library and finally found it on top of his father's desk.

"Why the bloody hell were you here?"

He went into the living room and saw white fitted sheets that were hung over a few chairs and lots of pillows from the guest bedroom and the pillows from his room.

"We used to do this at my home so I thought it would be nice to do it here while we watch the movies?" Thorin rubbed the back of his neck and looked anywhere else except Bilbo. Bilbo couldn't help but smile and turned on the telly. He inserted  _The_ _Philosopher's_ _Stone_  inside the DVD set and went to the linen closet. He grabbed as many blankets as he could carry and saw the fairy lights that his mother bought for parties next to the dishtowels.

"A proper fort needs blankets and a little bit of lights, don't you think?" 

Thorin laid out the fairy lights on top of their fort and some spilled a bit in front of the entrance while Bilbo prepped their tiny nest of blankets and pillows inside. Thorin switched off the lights leaving the blue glow from the telly and the soft yellow hue from the fairy lights. Once the fort was all set they grabbed their snacks and squeezed in together. 

The main song of Harry Potter began to play.

~

Thorin had to remind himself that this wasn't a date. This was just two guys hanging out with each other...in a small fort...with fairy lights...and a lot of cozy blankets and pillows...and marathoning a movie. 

_At least it's not a romance movie._

Thorin knew that he couldn't fool himself. This truly felt like a homebound date. The setting of the lights and how close they were to each other. Their shoulders touching each other and feeling each other's warmth. Oh, how he wanted Bilbo to lean his head against his shoulder so badly or at least throw his arm around him. But it can't be like that. They're not dating and he's not even sure if Bilbo is gay or even cared about dating at all! Suddenly everything felt too warm and his nerves got the better of him. He never talked during movies and even when his nerves did get the better of him he would never start talking. He'd usually find a place to stay hidden, but his uncomfortable case was that he didn't want to hide but to stay close to Bilbo, so talking was his only option.

"Does Harry and his friends ever do schoolwork?"

"Yes, they do."

"Really? Because it really doesn't seem like they do much of anything except almost getting themselves killed. And why are Slytherins always portrayed as snooty aristocrats? Surely, they're not all that bad."

Thorin kept asking small questions here and there, but he told Bilbo that he overall liked the series so far and can't wait to finish up the rest of them. They finished up  _The Prisoner of Azkaban_ till Bilbo decided that they should wait to finish the rest of them tomorrow. 

"It's getting a bit late. The leaves should be dried up by now, would you like some tea?"

"Yes, tea sounds nice."

~

"Do you think there's life after death?" Bilbo said suddenly. The telly was off and the kettle was heating up on top of the stove. They were both lying down inside their cozy little nest inside their white sheeted fort and looked up at the fairy lights. 

"Like an afterlife or do you mean reincarnation?" Thorin asked.

"Hmm...both?"

"In my country, it is said that when we die our spirits will ascend to the halls of our fathers and their fathers before them into the Great Halls."

"So, you believe in an afterlife then?"

"I think so? I mean I would like to believe there's something more out there for me. You?"

Bilbo had to ponder this. He honestly didn't know what to think, but soon his mouth got the better of him and started to blab.

"In the beginning, like most countries they were all pagans until the Christians took over and started to kill the cultures of the lands. The people here were pagans and worshipped their gods and goddess. The main goddess was the Green Lady or more well-known as Yavanna. She's the one who made us and in some books, it's said that my people derived from faeries. Other settlers would call us fae-folk or hobbits. I don't know where the word hobbit came from. Maybe it's from a dead language and we don't even know it. Or maybe my people were high as a kite from smoking or possibly from being too drunk? Haha, goodness knows how that word came to be." Thorin was now laying on his side keeping his head propped up with his hand listening intently.

"Keep going." Thorin whispered. 

"I guess my people thought that they were safe from intruders because according to our histories we'd been safe and living in peace for centuries. But, unfortunately, like the majority of other places the Christians did come and they killed and raped and maimed the people of the Shire. They forced them to believe in their faith and eventually time numbed the hobbits. And soon the majority of the people truly believed in the Christian faith and adopted it as their main religion."

A solemn silence settled inside the fort. Both boys looked at each other in the silence. The warm yellow glow of the fairy lights wrapped around them.

"That's sad," Thorin said, "Do you think they even tried to fight?"

"I'm sure they did. Despite the majority of the Shire now being Christians or Baptists or Evangelicals or whatever the fuck they want to call themselves now, but all wasn't lost. Some families saved the old books with traditions and some festivals that were celebrated by our ancestors are celebrated today. My mother's side of the family, the Tooks, are considered pagans because they still worship Yavanna."

"Are you pagan?"

"Uhmm..."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to pry, you don't have to answer." 

"I'm afraid that if I do answer you're going to look at me differently." Bilbo said looking down while playing with the loose thread on his quilted blanket.

"My people believe that we were carved from stone by our creator Mahal. We were like many other countries when invaders came into our land. They tried to shove their bullshit down our throats, but my people were stubborn mules and fought and drove them all away. Some Ereboreans believe in the outsider's faith, but it's not much."

Bilbo remained quiet and looked at him expectantly. 

"So, if it's any consolation to you I won't see you any differently, whatever your answer may be. The more I think about it, the more I believe that there is an afterlife. It's comforting, you know? It's nice that there's something out there waiting for me when I die."

Bilbo could only smile softly. He could never talk about these things to Hamfast and especially to his relatives. He heard the kettle whistling and got up quickly to turn off the stove. He poured the boiling water into their mugs and placed the tea strainer inside. The swirl of steam hit Bilbo's face and the tea was hot with Early Grey leaves that he plucked from the garden with Thorin. 

"Do you want any cream or sugar in your cup Thorin?" Bilbo asked. 

"Just four spoonful of sugar please."

"Really? Four? I really thought you were the kind to take your tea straight like your coffee."

"It's because tea is bitter and to put it plainly, coffee is better." Thorin said as Bilbo handed him his mug filled with sugar. 

"That is probably where we'll never ever agree with each other." Bilbo replied. He sat down and took a sip of his tea and felt immediately better. His toes were warming up and his tummy was comfortably warm.

"What about universes? Do you believe there's another universe out there?" Bilbo asked.

"Yeah, there has to be. I know there are people out there who believe that there isn't and that we're the only universe, but I don't know we can't be the only universe. What about you? You think there's more out there or that we're the only planet with human life?"

"Nah, I think there's more out there. There has to be. I mean, isn't it a fact that ninety something odd percent of the ocean is undiscovered? So, who's to say that there aren't any mermaids or Atlantis?"

Thorin laughed sloshing his tea.

"What? What's so funny?" Bilbo giggled.

"Mermaids and Atlantis?"

"What about them? You don't believe in mermaids?"

"No. I believe in the spirit of the sirens but physical mermaids, no."

"Not even Atlantis?"

"Of course not. How can a whole city still be thriving underwater?"

"I don't know. I'm not an expert at these things. Haha, oh well, believe what you want but I believe in mermaids. And if you drown because a pretty siren sings sweetly to your death don't come crying to me for help."

Thorin snickered.

They spoke of many things. Emotions, universes, aliens, faeries, reincarnations, hobbits, and Ereboreans. Their mugs were empty and Bilbo unplugged the fairy lights. The fort inside was now dark with only the moon illuminating the room. Both boys settled in their nest of blankets and pillows. Both their stomachs full with salty snacks and sweets and tea. Thorin's eyes were closed and Bilbo could tell that Thorin was slowly drifting into the lull of sleep and before he did he gathered enough bravery inside himself and went closer to Thorin.

"I am a pagan." Bilbo whispered. 

With his eyes still closed, Thorin smiled and whispered back, 

"I know."

~

"Thorin," Bilbo whispered but Thorin didn't move, "Thorin."

He shook Thorin slightly and heard him grumble. He pulled his pillow closer to his chest. 

"Thorin. We have to go to sleep in our beds and not on the floor."

"Screw the bed, we can sleep here."

_Oh Thorin, please don't tempt me. It's hard enough as it is._

"Please Thorin?"

He heard him sigh deeply and managed to get up. They left their fort and headed down the hall near their rooms. Bilbo saw that Thorin's hair was mussed a bit.

"Thorin your hair."

"Hm? What about it?"

"It's kind of messy. Here I'll fix it a bit." 

Bilbo patted down the strands that stuck up from Thorin's bed head. He didn't realize how close he was to Thorin till he smelled his scent and saw how close he was to his lips.

It happened so unexpectedly.

So quickly.

It was only one small kiss. A touch of dry lips that sweetly grazed each other. Bilbo stood there frozen, he knew that he made one of the biggest mistake of his life. Why did he do that? He wracked through his brain trying to understand what he had just done. This wasn't supposed to happen, this was never supposed to happen. He slowly backed away, mumbling his apologies and the door was so far away, he'd wish his feet wouldn't feel like lead so he could dash into the night and hide somewhere where Thorin could forget about him. Then he felt Thorin's large warm hands grasping his shoulders and felt his strength pulling towards his broad chest. 

_Okay, he's not beating me up yet so that's a good sign._

"Thorin?" Bilbo whispered. That was all he could manage to say before Thorin brought his own lips towards Bilbo's. This kiss wasn't chaste. It was hungry. His hand cupped the back of Bilbo's neck to angle his head just a bit higher. He felt Thorin's tongue lick a swipe to his lips and he couldn't help but moan at the feel of it. Bilbo opened his lips and he felt Thorin's tongue explore the caverns of his mouth. It felt so good. This all felt too good to be true because this can't be true, right? Thorin is too good, too warm, too perfect to be doing this to him. But when he felt Thorin's other hand going down to his waist and pulling him in to be as close to his body as possible, Bilbo suddenly didn't have a care in the world of his doubts. Bilbo couldn't help himself by letting his hands wander around his strong chest and from the sound of Thorin's moan he didn't mind it either. 

Their bodies writhed in a rhythm. His strength made Bilbo feel soft and pliant while he felt his spine zipped with electric sparks. Thorin was, in some manner of speaking, eloquent in his own way and it didn't surprise Bilbo that he kissed like fire. The taste of Thorin was heavy on his tongue and the scent of his musk was overwhelming. His body couldn't control himself nor did he care. He felt the blood running to his erection through his sweatpants. He knew Thorin had to feel it because he wedged his thigh between Bilbo's legs. His body moved on its own by doing sharp dry humps on Thorin's thigh. It wasn't long till Bilbo felt Thorin's throbbing hard on. He could feel the hard rod through Thorin's soft pants and he wished he could have more courage to just yank his pants off and blow him right there and then, but he knew this had to stop. No matter how touch starved he was or how much his body screamed to be with Thorin, this was going too fast. He had to stop this before they would do something they both regret.

"Thorin." Bilbo mumbled through the kiss. Thorin was too much in a daze to hear his name being called out to him. He moved away from Bilbo's now swollen lips and kissed his cheeks and forehead and nose and went back to his lips again. He was tasting him and he tasted so sweet. Bilbo gasped and said his name louder this time.

"Hm?" Thorin said and pulled away from Bilbo's face. Their eyes met and for an instant Bilbo had forgotten what he was about to say. Like always he could only describe Thorin's eyes like the ocean and it was easy to get lost in. He didn't remember how he found his voice but all he remembered was saying to Thorin, "The wedding's tomorrow. We should probably get some sleep."

Thorin's shoulders sagged and his grip loosened. 

"Yes. Y-You're right. We should get some sleep." The boys shuffled away from each other, now too shy to look at the other in the eyes. Bilbo didn't know what to say after that and how could he? His crippling doubts and insecurities washed over him like ocean waves crashing against cliffs. And it was to Bilbo's horror that he now realized that Thorin had touched his waist. His fat waist. Thorin could probably feel the soft cushion of skin through his sweatshirt. Bilbo wanted to throw up; it was a strange feeling but he even felt disgusted for Thorin. How could such a handsome man like Thorin have the desire to touch him? Even though having felt Thorin's strength and lips and all its brash hunger of lust felt the most natural thing in the world to Bilbo, but his mind was telling him that men as handsome as Thorin will never go for boys that looked like him.

"I—" Bilbo started. 

Thorin still hadn't moved and he spoke quietly, "Yes?"

_I'm sorry._

"I was thinking we should get up early so I could make us some breakfast."

"Oh. Yeah that sounds pretty good. Can you give me a wake-up call?"

"Yeah sure." Bilbo said as he looked down at his feet. He felt embarrassed, he didn't know what to say. It wasn't like before after they had finished watching a few of the Harry Potter films when Bilbo's word vomit wasn't viewed as annoying and realizing that Thorin wasn't like his relatives or the few friends he had in high school where they would've scoffed at his ramblings about afterlives and universes and emotions. Thorin contributed his opinions and it was...nice. Everything was easy after the mess that he had made. There wasn't any awkward tension like now nor were there any hurt feelings. 

_W_ _hy did I have to fuck this up?_   _Why couldn't I_ _have controlled_ _myself better? Why_ _—_

It was quick and scratchy. The kiss on his cheek. He looked up and saw Thorin half smiling.

"Good night Bilbo." Thorin walked off into the dark hallway. As soon as he heard the door shut, his legs gave out. He crumpled to the floor like a rag doll and his hands were trembling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes I am still trying to get back into the swing of things. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> It was about fucking time that these boys started kissing! 
> 
> Ahahahahahaha, I left you all with (yet again) a slight cliffhanger, sorry. Let's hope that the next chapter won't give me any trouble so I can post it as soon as possible.
> 
> Hello to the few new people that found this fanfic of mine. I hope you all enjoyed it and will be kind enough to be as patient as you can with me, thanks again for reading. <3 
> 
> PS: I know that for some people 2017 was the worst year ever, but I want to let everyone know that 2018 can be great as long as you make it great! A new year is like a clean slate and you can start anew or your personal resolutions! Mine is to write more, exercise in my mind and body, and to travel as much as possible!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I am back! Work has been so stressful, but hey at least I'm getting hours and getting that money! >:D I hope all of you have been well so far and doing well with all the things that you are doing this year.
> 
> I want to thank you all, yet again, for reading and commenting on this piece of work and I hope you will continue to enjoy   
> it as much as I enjoy writing it!
> 
> Prompt idea: http://otpisms.tumblr.com/post/130813575118/otp-idea-239
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> PS: YET AGAIN!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE KUDOS AND COMMENTS THEY REALLY DO LIFT UP MY SPIRITS AND MAKE ME HAPPY! YA'LL ARE TRULY THE BEST <3

Bilbo, begrudgingly, rose early before his alarm. He stared out the window and heard the small mourning doves cooing. The sun rays baring slowly inside his room. Flashes of what had happened last night was fresh in his mind. The unexpected kiss he gave to Thorin, Thorin kissing him back, touching Thorin’s chest, their cocks becoming hard — his mind stopped, the sudden rush of shame flushed his face.

“Oh, bother.” Bilbo rubbed his face. As much as his mind was screaming at him to stay hidden beneath the covers of the soft quilted blankets and to never show his face ever again to Thorin, he knew he had to get out of bed. After all the wedding was today and he wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. He wasn’t thrilled to go to the wedding and face his gossipy relatives. Bilbo already knew that the moment that he would come in with Thorin will be the moment that they will bombard him with pestering questions about his ‘friend’. “Who’s this Bilbo?” “Why is his hair so long? That’s strange, he’ll be much more handsome if he cuts it.” “My, my is he single? I’d love for my daughter to meet him.”

Bilbo got up and made his bed. He then opened his closet and brought out his suit that was neatly pressed, he laid it out gently unto his bed. He half expected Thorin to be already up, but when he walked to the kitchen he wasn’t there. The living room was still decorated with their blanket fort and the empty bowls and mugs were scattered everywhere. He could practically hear his father telling him, ‘A Baggins would never leave a mess like this.’ He began to clean up and organize everything. It took a while, but the living room was back in order.

He thought that he would make some breakfast for both him and Thorin. He grabbed two plates when a small creeping thought crawled through his mind telling him that if he ate breakfast he would surely bloat and he would look bigger than he already was.

“But I’m so hungry though…” he whispered to himself.

_No, you’re not. You’re not hungry. You think that you are, but you’re not. Just fill up with some tea or water, that’ll make you feel better. Do you want to look fatter than you already are in front of your relatives and especially in front of Thorin? No, you don’t._

Bilbo stocked his plate back to the cabinet and decided to cook breakfast only for Thorin. _I’ll just say I already had breakfast, that’s a good excuse, right?_

Thorin was a strong and big man, his gut told him that he probably always woke up hungry. He decided to make him a proper full English breakfast with the works: bacon, sausages, grilled tomatoes, buttered toast, fried mushrooms, baked beans, and hash browns. It took strong will power to not save a plate for himself once he smelled the sausages and bacon sizzling on the iron pan. Instead, he had his mug ready for some hot tea to “fill” his hungry belly.

~

Thorin woke up from the smell of breakfast. He could smell bacon and sausages and eggs. His stomach fully woke up with a growl and he knew that he had to wake up. He trudged to the bathroom and cleaned his face. He looked at his reflection. His hair was mussed from tossing and turning all night. He couldn’t stop thinking about how he behaved in front of Bilbo. He wasn’t usually forward with his feelings and actions. He didn’t know why but when Bilbo kissed him last night it triggered something and he couldn’t help himself to kiss him back. He’s wanted to do that for so long. He remembered how Bilbo touched him and it reminded him how lonely he was. He recalled the countless flings that he had with other men. It was fun meaningless sex. The euphoria of having countless orgasms and figuring out what he liked in bed was amazing, but soon the faces started to become faceless. The bodies were just warm things to keep the other side of the bed warm. It became a cycle, the faceless people always wanted something more than just sex, they wanted feelings involved. The cycle was vicious and mentally exhausting, so he stopped having one-night stands because he knew that sex was an intimate thing and feelings will always find a way to be caught. Back then he didn’t have time for feelings. Feelings made you vulnerable and wearing your heart on your sleeve was asking for trouble.

Thorin always had a serious façade that could make the toughest person shrink away, but Bilbo saw passed that. He wasn’t frightened of Thorin’s demeanor even from the way Thorin previewed his violent nature when Smaug came out of nowhere that one night. Bilbo was different and Thorin wanted him so badly, but as much as he wanted him, he knew that Bilbo needed time. There was something that Bilbo was going through. Ever since Bilbo had told him there was something going on with himself and how he didn’t like to talk about it made Thorin wonder what it could it possibly be and if it was high chance that Bilbo wouldn’t want to be with anyone romantically till he sorted himself out.

He sighed deeply.

He knew that he had to face Bilbo and he was thinking of what he was going to say. Thorin didn’t want to go out there and make everything awkward. He was unsure of what to do. He always had a plan, but this time logic wasn’t on his side. He went back to his room and brushed his hair, procrastinating a bit longer before heading to the kitchen where he knew Bilbo was preparing breakfast.

“Have to face this sooner or later, might as well be now.” Thorin said to himself.

~

Thorin walked to the kitchen and saw a full English breakfast that was ready for him with a mug of hot coffee. Bilbo already sat down and was fully interested in a book that he was reading with an empty mug in his hand.

“Good morning.” Thorin said. Bilbo gave a small yelp not fully realizing that Thorin was there.

“Oh, uhm yes! G-Good morning.” Bilbo blushed.

“Have you eaten?”

_No._

“Yeah. I already ate.” Bilbo lied smoothly. Thorin’s eyes narrowed, the pans that Bilbo had used to make breakfast was still on the stove and the sink was spotless and the dish rack was empty. Thorin decided to let the lie slip just this once, he had bigger matters to talk about, but first breakfast was waiting to be devoured.

~

Thorin ate with a gusto and complimented how amazing the food was.

“Are you sure you want to be an English major? You should really become a chef and have your own restaurant, this is really good.”

Bilbo laughed, “Well I’m glad you like it.”

Thorin’s plate was soon emptied out and he got up to clean his plate. Bilbo immediately shot up, “Oh no, don’t you dare. You’re the guest and I’m the host. I’ll clean.”

“It’s fine. I don’t mind.” But Bilbo insisted that he should be the one cleaning till Thorin offered that he would wash and Bilbo can dry. Bilbo frowned but still agreed. He gathered the pans and brought them to the sink. Neither spoke to each other, the only sound was the faucet running and clattering plates and utensils. Now the tension waved over both boys. They were so close to each other and when Thorin handed Bilbo a plate, Thorin’s wet soapy fingers brushed his dry hand. The touch wasn’t anything special, they knew that it shouldn’t but it was. Bilbo’s heart hammered and a pang of anxiousness awakened inside his chest.

Thorin sighed, “Are we going to talk about what happened last night?”

Bilbo hitched a breath. Oh Yavanna, he most certainly did not want to talk about it, thank you very much!

“I thought that you would’ve wanted to forget about the whole thing.”

Thorin was quiet for a while and he switched the faucet off. He watched hard as the soapy water went down the drain. Bilbo stopped drying the plate and gripped it so tight that he thought it might break.

“I…” Thorin started

Bilbo held his breath. _This is it. This is where everything ends._

“I don’t…want to forget about it.” Thorin said it so softly that Bilbo almost missed it.

“Y-You don’t?” He refused to look at those blue eyes.

“No.” Thorin simply stated.

Bilbo tucked the dishes and pans away slowly. He felt Thorin’s eyes on him; he knew that Thorin wanted him to say something, but he wasn’t sure what to say. Everything was put away in their rightful place and this time Bilbo knew that he couldn’t run away from this. He turned around and crossed his arms protectively on his chest and didn’t look at Thorin.

The only thing that he could say was a question. “Why?”

“Because I like you Bilbo Baggins. I like you a lot.”

“You shouldn’t though.” Bilbo said quietly.

Thorin was confused and asked, “Why?”

“Because…”

“That’s not an answer. Why?”

“Because, that’s why!” Bilbo’s temper flared, but Thorin was stubborn.

“Bilbo! That’s not a real answer! Why? Why can’t I like you?”

“BECAUSE I’M ME! DON’T YOU GET IT?” Bilbo shouted. The silence was deafening. Thorin’s brows furrowed still not fully understanding.

Bilbo scoffed, “Don’t you get it? Guys that look so good like you don’t go out with guys like me! I’m not perfect like the others! I’m too short, too fat, and too ugly! I’m too ug—”

“Bilbo, I swear to Mahal if you say that word one more time I swear—”

“But it’s true though!”

“No, it’s not! I don’t know who told you that but they’re wrong! Whoever told you that is a piece of shit and a nobody that doesn’t deserve your time or your attention or your tears! You deserve everything that is good and lovely. You deserved to be spoiled! And if we were back in my home, by Mahal, you would be spoiled rotten. I would give you anything you want! Books, tea, diamonds, anything you desire because you deserve more. You deserve all the love and happiness simply because you are you and that’s what I love about you! You’re not fake like the rest! You’re real and genuine! I love the things that you hate about yourself. I love your body, I love the way you scrunch up your nose, I love your curls, I love when you talk about your favorite stories, and I love when you wear your glasses! I think you’re the most intelligent, wittiest and most beautiful person I’ve known in my entire life!”

Bilbo’s arms were uncrossed and he stood there dumbfounded. Thorin was panting from his long confession and he gave a somewhat manic chuckle.

“I…I’ve had the biggest crush on you since high school Bilbo Baggins and I wish you could see how perfect you are to me and how long I’ve always wanted you.”

Bilbo blinked and said dumbly, “Y-Y-You like my glasses?”

“What?”

“Do you like when I wear my eyeglasses?”

“Yeah?” Thorin said as if it was obvious, “Maybe my confession wasn’t clear about how I love literally everything you do.”

“And…you’ve had a crush on me since high school?”

“Oh my…Yes! For Mahal’s sake yes! Are you deaf?!”

“No…just flabbergasted.”

“Bless you.” Thorin said. They both stared at each other and burst into a fit of laughter. This was all so awkward they couldn’t help themselves but laugh at one another. Bilbo’s sides were starting to hurt and his eyes were watery from laughing too hard.

“I can’t believe this! You, Thorin Durin, like me? Since high school? Oh dear heavens, I went through all that trouble for nothing!”

“What trouble?”

The fitted laughs slowly died down, “The trouble of having all those thoughts on how unworthy I was for you if I were to ever confess to you. I think you still don’t understand, but you were popular and I wasn’t. You were the strong big handsome athlete that everyone loved while I was the one hiding behind dusty bookshelves and had my nose in a book or hiding behind the bleachers watching you play rugby. You should know that back then someone like me wouldn’t have a chance with someone like you; it simply wasn’t done. You could have had anyone you wanted. The pretty girls or even the pretty boys with their perfect bodies and hair. But now I see that you’ve liked me all this time and you know what? I’ve had a pretty big crush on you too since high school. I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t know if you were gay or not. And if you weren’t gay, I thought that you were going to be like everyone else and make fun of me. But I like you too.”

There was a pause and Bilbo started twiddling his fingers, a nervous habit that he could never get out of.

“I remember the day I first saw you.”

“What? Really?”

“It was third period and I couldn’t stop staring at you for some reason. I don’t remember what you were talking about with your friends, but your laugh was so light and contagious that I couldn’t help but laugh myself. And every time you talked about what you loved, I swear your eyes sparkled. To me you were perfect in every way.”

“Really?” Bilbo said softly.

“Yes. I even remember when I was in the library because my grades were slipping and I knew that I had to pass some stupid class or else they wouldn’t let me play rugby. I saw you by the window. Your table had two stacks of books and you were reading something, I think it was King Arthur. I remember everyone telling me how you were the smartest kid in class and the cleverest. I thought to myself, ‘If I want to get him to notice me, I have to be smart like him maybe then he’ll be impressed.’ That obviously didn’t work. I even tried to read the books that you were reading, but you read so much that I couldn’t keep up. So, I watched you from afar. I saw how the kids at school would tease you and every time they did I would beat them up after they were done with you and told them not to say anything, but I guess that still didn’t stop them from teasing you, I’m sorry.”

Bilbo’s mouth was open in disbelief. “I can’t believe it. You’ve been standing up for me since the beginning. How can I ever thank you for that?”

“A kiss wouldn’t hurt.” Thorin jokingly said, but Bilbo took it seriously and kissed him sweetly on the lips.

“So, what now?” Bilbo asked breathlessly.

“Before I devour you, I think we should start getting ready for your relative’s wedding.” Thorin kissed Bilbo’s forehead and went straight to his room.

_Devour…me? Why can’t I breathe?_

~

They both were ready. Bilbo had to control himself from looking at Thorin. His long dark mane was neat and tidy. His suit fit him perfectly and he could smell his musky cologne.

“You look damn good Bilbo.” Thorin smirked. Bilbo’s face was red as his prized tomatoes and muttered something that Thorin didn’t catch.

“W-W-We should head out now so we can get this over with.”

“Is your friend going to come with us?”

“No. He’s most likely already there as well with everyone in the Shire. It’s not that far from here anyways so we can walk. Trust me, it won’t be hard to miss.”

Bilbo and Thorin were out the door. The sun was bright and the weather was crisp and cool, a perfect day for an outdoor wedding. Thorin gave his arm to Bilbo, “Lead the way. I have horrible sense of direction.” Bilbo linked his arm with Thorin’s and they both began walking.

_So, this is what this feels like._ Bilbo had to admit that walking around his town with a handsome man like Thorin was nice. His arm was strong and comforting; Bilbo was half tempted to lean his head on his shoulder as they continued their walk.

“Your hometown is so peaceful…and green.”

Bilbo snickered, “Green? Is that really all you can think of?”

“Yes. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so much green in all my life!”

“I’m assuming they don’t have that many hills in Erebor then?”

“No, it’s mainly mountainous. We have dense forests, but even then, the trees aren’t as green as here.”

“Shame.” Bilbo whispered.

Both boys walked a bit further till they saw many people in dresses and suits to the wedding. Colorful balloons, flowers, and ribbons were seen. The colors were so bright and gaudy that Bilbo had to force himself not to roll his eyes because, yes of course, Lobelia had to have the boldest and ugliest colors at her wedding. The Victorian gazebo was dowsed in colorful flowers and what appeared to be lace. The seats had baby pink cushions and were all decorated with ribbons. Across the gazebo were probably over forty long tables in a row with many chairs and orange tents that had the main courses all set and ready for the guests after the ceremony. Many people flocked to their seats; the ladies wearing different feathered hats and unnecessarily fanning themselves while the men were sitting uncomfortably in their starchy suits. All the men were dressed in black tuxes while Bilbo and Thorin were the only ones that stood out the most with their choice of colors.

“Wow…” Thorin whispered, “Now I’ve been to my fair share of weddings, but this is something else.”

“Really?”

“Yeah… it’s so ugly.”

Bilbo burst into a fit of laughter, “You sir, I definitely not wrong. Oh Yavanna, look at those poor bridesmaids! What color even is that? Pink or salmon?” All fifteen bridesmaids wore long length-shoulder-capped-salmon dresses where the edges of their skirts were dipped in silver glitter. All and all the bridesmaids looked terrible and didn’t look happy being part of this whole ceremony. Bilbo knew that Lobelia had to have chosen the ugliest dresses so she would outshine everyone.

“You were very smart not to bring Ori along with you, he would have a heart attack if he saw this.” Thorin said.

“You’re probably right on that.”

“Bilbo? Bilbo Baggins is that you?”

~

Thorin saw Bilbo closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. With practiced ease he smiled widely and shook whoever it was that greeted him.

“Well, shouldn’t the groom be out on the gazebo waiting for his, uhm—”

_Hideous, horrible, tackiest, bitchiest, the most disgusting piece of shit that ever lived—_

“L-Lovely bride?” Bilbo managed to finish.

“Oh, well you know my sweetie pie loves to take her time with her hair and makeup. Anywho, I was just wondering who this was that you brought along, could’ve sworn my darling said you were bringing a girl.”

_Ah. Yes, this is what Bilbo was talking about; the uptight relatives._ Thorin’s temple started to throb.

“Ah... haha yeah she did tell me to bring a girl, but you know me Otho…” Bilbo looked everywhere else but Otho, “By the way, what’s the theme of the wedding.”

“Oh, beats the hell out of me,” Otho looked at Thorin then to Bilbo, “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your ‘friend’.”

“Thorin. Thorin Durin,” Thorin said reaching for Otho’s hand for a handshake. Otho squeezed Thorin’s hand and Thorin, purposefully, tightened it and smirked as soon as he saw Otho tugging for his hand back.

“Ah, quite a strong grip you got lad.”

“Yes, I play rugby. You need a good grip to tackle and beat down your opponents.” Thorin smiled menacingly. Otho twiddled his fingers and began to straighten his already straight tie.

“Well, as you said Bilbo I best be getting to the gazebo to wait for my lovely bride. See you after the ceremony.”

Otho walked away quickly. Bilbo guided Thorin to the last row. Bilbo knew that he was being petty because he knew that when Lobelia would walk down the aisle she would see him with Thorin instead of a ‘pretty girl’ like she asked of him. Was it petty? Yes. Was it going to be absolutely worth it? Hell yes.

“Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but did you subliminally threaten my relative?” Bilbo whispered.

“No of course not. That would be rude.” Thorin smiled wolfishly.

“You’re such a bad man, Thorin.”

“True, but I’m your bad man.”

~

The small band began to play the classic “Here Comes the Bride” theme. The flower girl, who looked exhausted with having to walk down the aisle with a heavy looking poofy princess dress, threw rose petals on the ground. Everyone stood from their seats and applauded as soon as Lobelia walked down the aisle.

“Mahal…. she’s absolutely hideous.”

“Sshh! Thorin! If you keep this up I’m never going to stop laughing,” Bilbo snickered, “But you are right though, she looks horrible. I mean who wears a feather netted hat on their wedding day? If that’s what that even is!”

“Well if you think about it, she’s doing everyone a favor so we don’t have to see her face.”

Lobelia walked down the aisle and saw Bilbo. Her face flushed with anger and her eyes were narrow slits. Bilbo could see the slight snarl on her lips and have her a triumphant smirk.

_Oh yes, this is going to be a wedding that she’s never going to forget._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed it and please pardon any grammar mistakes. I would love to see feedback from you guys cause I'm sure that would really lift my spirits. :')
> 
> Phew! I'm so glad that I got this chapter in. I'm happy with it because our boys are finally starting to realize that they were made for each other and that they should just keep kissing and cuddling and being happy and yet at the same time I'm not too happy with how rushed it all felt. I promise you we'll get to the juicy stuff with the wedding in the next chapter. <3
> 
> LOVE YOU ALL <3


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